Putting an end time to garden drinks party

Counting_Pennies_2

I wonder if you can help. I am in the process of arranging a garden drinks party. The house is undergoing renovations and our children will be asleep, so we are restricting it to the garden only, with access to the kitchen and downstairs loo.

I thought to save our neighbours the noise at bed time, and also to allow people to book babysitters and politely inform people of the time to leave I might put an end time on the invite.

Do you think that is too rude?

Thanks

LameWolf

I'm no expert on etiquette by any means, but it sounds reasonable to me. I've heard of invitations saying something like "8 til late" so I don't see why "8 til 10:30" or whatever your proposed times are should be a problem.:o

Good luck, I hope it's a great party!:o

chase_the_ace

No it's not rude, think it's ok and also gives your guests a time frame to work to.Stops people thinking they can turn up 2 hours late and of course your neighbours (if your not inviting them) will appreciate the cut off time.
Only negative I can think of is it might put an end to a really great party if it's going really well.
Have a great time!!

FairyPrincessk

Not rude at all! I almost always do this as I have limited energy and fade quickly at night but don't really know how to "end a party" when its going on. If you're worried about it, then just made a little joke in the invite---something like, "8-10 so we can stay on good terms with the neighbours" etc. Some people might stick around, but most of the time I find people respect it. If you have a closer friend coming, you could have them lead up the ending of the party, a lot of people drift at the same time. Make sure you have taxi numbers on hand and have a great time!

BitterAndTwisted

No, not rude at all. I would send everyone a written invitation, either by hand, post or email. Put a start and end-time on it and call it "an early evening drinks party". Then there's no chance of a misunderstanding or people feeling unwelcome when you try to wind things down. I'd also be thinking about removing access to more drinks about 30 minutes before you want the last stragglers to be gone.

Butterfly_Brain

Not at all rude, I do this when we have a barbecue. But do let your neighbours know as well at least they will be aware of what is going on and know a time that it is finishing

jackyann

I always do this, partly because I turn into a pumpkin at 11pm, partly because I don't want to annoy neighbours - I usually invite immediate neighbours if appropriate, but our previous house backed on to several houses (sounds odd, but it was the way roads turned) and it was too many to invite!).
I would inform the neighbours anyway, most don't expect to be invited unless they are friends anyway or it's obviously "open".
I actually think most people really like an end point - saves worrying about what time it seems polite to say you are leaving!

I usually put 10.30 for an evening do: I reckon people tend to hang about for half-an-hour or so. 11pm is the usual time for environmental health to expect normal social noise to cease in residential areas.
However, I have done a few "open house" events (though admittedly you have to feed people) that begin the afternoon so people can bring kids and end at 9 - 9.30. Suits me a lot better.

I love the expression people used to put on formal invitations: "carriages at 10.30pm"!!!!

pigpen

Just put your pjs on and sit yawning.. people will soon get the message!

JodyBPM

Am I the only one who thinks this is really rude? It would make me feel very unwelcome and uncomfortable, and I'd probably take a rain check.

Each to their own, I guess, but I tend to have a "mi casa es tu casa" approach to entertaining, and wouldn't dream of chucking guests out at a specified time. TBH if I wanted a set/earlier end time, I'd probably suggest a pub/restaurant rather than entertaining at home.

kittycat204

I would set an end time, wouldn't cross my mind not to, if i wanted to. You are entertaining, they are your friends and should be thankful just to see you. If they don't like it they don't have to come and TBH I would wonder what kind of friends they were.

BitterAndTwisted

JodyBPM wrote: »

Am I the only one who thinks this is really rude? It would make me feel very unwelcome and uncomfortable, and I'd probably take a rain check.

Yes, it appears that you are in a minority of one here.

If folks are doing a BBQ lunch or whatnot they most probably don't want people still sitting there drinking at 11 o'clock at night.

It's never been considered rude in the past to tell people when you expect them to show up and until what time said event is lasting for. Some people need it spelled out or they're harder to shift than a case of boils!