Best thing to do? SOA

Badsaver

Re the packed lunches, I'm going to take a stab in the dark guess that you probably make your son a sandwich but then put in cartons/bottles of juice, packet of crisps, packet of biscuits, packaged cheese etc. I used to do this and it cost a fortune. Get rid of the prepackaged stuff and it will be ALOT cheaper. A few ideas are :

Leftovers from dinner the night before (if they can be eaten cold)
Pasta salad
Crackers and cheese or ham (just cut cheese from the block you have in the fridge or take a couple slices out of a pack of ham you have at home and stick it in a tuppereware with some tomatoes and cucumber etc)
Salad bowls made from stuff in the fridge
Homemade biscuits and cakes. super quick and easy to make and far more cost effective. Maybe your partner could make these during the day.
Instead of buying individual fruit baggies (if you do) just chop some up from home or pop a few grapes from a large punnet into a tupperware or sandwich bag.
Buy a reuseable bottle and fill it with either water or diluting juice.


Sorry if you've tried this already just thought it may help

Thanks - yes I will try this. I do have to give 2 weeks notice at school first though, he is quite a fussy eater, although he has improved loads recently and we have started eating a lot more variety - still struggle with fruit & veg though!!

Bedsit Bob:

Quit Sky ASAP.

Check out Uswitch for a better deal.

I am always a little wary of trying new broadband providers, Im happy with sky and my OH is very particular on his Broadband, he plays on his Xbox a lot and its not proved very ggo when we have tried a new provider.

£25pm seems a lot of pocket money for an 8 year-old.

Yes, it may be a little high, but I have set it now, its £5 per week and to be fair, he doesn't always get it, just when he remembers, I may actually make him 'earn' his pocket money though now he is older!

oopsadaisydoddle

I don't mean to sound harsh but you are making excuses re: a couple of the suggestions. Others have said about getting rid of sky but you won't because of the broadband.

You are still going to give an 8 yr old £25 pocket money AND all the other activities? You simply cannot afford to live this lifestyle.

My kids get a bit spent on them if we go to indoor play areas but I have found a really good value one where we get in half price and a ju if juice and coffee we spend about £10 - £15 for a whole afternoon. We try to do this only once a month and when it is raining. And yes, I believe your child should be earning that amount...I uses to work a month at a saturday job to get that (although that's going back a while). My eldest DS gets his phone paid for (very heavily discounted though) and I give him £10 every pay day. He earns these by doing jobs and babysitting his younger siblings.

We have recently started geocaching which is a great activity for all the family and no cost involved. On phone and can't do links but if you google geocaching, you will find details.

Badsaver

oopsadaisydoddle wrote: »

I don't mean to sound harsh but you are making excuses re: a couple of the suggestions. Others have said about getting rid of sky but you won't because of the broadband.

You are still going to give an 8 yr old £25 pocket money AND all the other activities? You simply cannot afford to live this lifestyle.

My kids get a bit spent on them if we go to indoor play areas but I have found a really good value one where we get in half price and a ju if juice and coffee we spend about £10 - £15 for a whole afternoon. We try to do this only once a month and when it is raining. And yes, I believe your child should be earning that amount...I uses to work a month at a saturday job to get that (although that's going back a while). My eldest DS gets his phone paid for (very heavily discounted though) and I give him £10 every pay day. He earns these by doing jobs and babysitting his younger siblings.

We have recently started geocaching which is a great activity for all the family and no cost involved. On phone and can't do links but if you google geocaching, you will find details.

No - I do sound like I am making excuses, I know where you are coming from. I give in quite easily and paying 10 a month for a decent broadbrand, way outweighs the constant moaning about the bad quality of the new provider. I seem to be living on eggshells at the moment, due to the nature of OH's illness so the less 'stress' for want of a better word, the better.
I will cut down little ones pocket money. We have done geocaching before and will be going on bike rides as soon as I get my bike fixed (should only be about £15)

I will compromise on stuff of course, I am happy to cancel my TV package, reduce my mobile when I can. I am buying cheaper cuts of meat and now use my slow cooker a lot. Cubs helps my son learn lots of things, gives him activities outside of school and he goes on camp, he never stays away so camping away from home helps!! Swimming is a great source of exercise for him and its obviously a valuable thing to know. It would cost more per month for me to take him swimming than it would for his lessons. Music lessons, okay, not much of a need to know thing, but I was always brought up with music lessons, as was my partner and he enjoys doing them. I would much rather me cut down on stuff than him.

I seem to spend a lot of money at work, lunch, fizzy drinks (I actually believe I am addicted to a certain brand of drink... so cutting back on those would save a fortune. I am trying but need to take proper steps rather than baby ones

bouncydog1

Sorry but I have to be a little harsh here. You are working your socks off, whilst your OH sits at home, plays Xbox, watches Netflix, complains about broadband speed and appears to do little else, whilst you walk on eggshells worrying about your financial position! Oh and you pay for his phone.

Does he help whilst you are working by doing the housework, cook from scratch, collect your child from school to go swimming, cubs, music?


He could be doing stuff like online surveys, search on the net for best value broadband, utilities etc. I do have sympathy for those who are ill, but equally I also believe that there has to be a will to get better and it does seem as if he is comfortable with the current state of affairs, whilst you are not. Time for a little chat methinks!

[Deleted User]

Badsaver wrote: »

and paying 10 a month for a decent broadband, way outweighs the constant moaning about the bad quality of the new provider.

Why do you believe Sky to be superior to all other ISPs :huh:

Pop along to the Internet Access Board, and ask people's opinion of their ISP.

Then choose one that a lot of people recommend.

[Deleted User]

Badsaver wrote: »

cubs will stop over the summer but I still have to pay the £12.50!!!

So, you will continue to pay, even though your child isn't attending?

Summer break is what, 3 months?

So really, you are paying the Cubs group £16-66 per month, not £12-50.

Not trying to be nasty, but you are currently living beyond your means.

If you are going to get this sorted, you need to cut back, a lot.

That means at least the following:-

Get rid of Sky, and move to a cheaper ISP. That could save you as much as £38-50pm.

Cut back on child related activities and pocket money. Cutting out music lessons, and halving pocket money, would save you £52-50pm.

With one 8 year-old child, do you really need to spend £600pa on presents? Halving the presents fund will save you £25pm.

These alone add up to an extra £116pm.

That would pay off Capital One in the 1st month, Wonga in months 2 to 6, your overdraft in months 6 and 7, and your family in months 8 and 9.

You could be debt free by the end of January.

The first sentence, of your opening post, says:-

"I'm not in huge debt by any means".

That's true, ATM.

However, if you keep on living beyond your means,

you will end up in huge debt.

[Deleted User]

Badsaver wrote: »

I have just realised I have missed a few things too, Xbox Live x 2, Netflix x 1

Get rid and get rid.

You can't afford them ATM.

[Deleted User]

Badsaver wrote: »

My partner is not really well at the moment...

...although he has just registered for a full time open uni course

He's not well enough to work, but he's well enough to do a full time OU course :huh:

No offence, but I think he's taking you for a fool.

And how much is this course costing?

redpete

Badsaver wrote: »

cubs will stop over the summer but I still have to pay the £12.50!!!

That's just the way they spread the cost over 12 months instead of 9. It might be worth seeing if they could reduce the cost for a period whilst you get things together - I know our local group are happy to make allowances for real financial hardship, have a word with the leader. (But only if you control the other expenses, I wouldn't consider reducing the cost for someone if I knew they also spent £85 a month on swimming, music and pocket money.)

I have just realised I have missed a few things too, Xbox Live x 2, Netflix x 1

Get rid of these, partner's planning on OU course so won't have time for these.

RAS

Badsaver wrote: »

No - I do sound like I am making excuses, I know where you are coming from.

Cubs helps my son learn lots of things, gives him activities outside of school and he goes on camp, he never stays away so camping away from home helps!! Swimming is a great source of exercise for him and its obviously a valuable thing to know. It would cost more per month for me to take him swimming than it would for his lessons. Music lessons, okay, not much of a need to know thing, but I was always brought up with music lessons, as was my partner and he enjoys doing them. I would much rather me cut down on stuff than him.

Your son is 8 years old. He has a whole life time ahead of him. He does not need swimming lessons all the time, nor does he need music lessons at the time.

Right now you are in a financial mess. Either he has swimming or he has music, not both. You can re-start the other subject when you have got your finances sorted out, or when he is a strong enough swimmer, stop lessons and re-start music.

Why have you got 3 phones for 2 people?