Marriage Split - HELP!

andy9

Hi,

2 weeks ago my wife dropped a bombshell and said she was leaving me, didn't love me anymore and has been having an affair! We have been married just over 4 years and have 2 young children.
After the hurt and anger and once I calmed down, we sat to talk about stuff and have agreed to be as amicable as possible about the split. We will share custody of the children 50/50.

But then the conversation turned to money, and as I have savings and she has nothing, it turned a bit nasty.
We have a house together with about £100K left on the mortgage. House value about £220K.
I have about £30K in savings.
She has already found a house to rent and is talking about a final settlement. She is also talking about a seperation. I would be grateful if anyone knows the answers to the following:

How much is she entitled too?
Is there anyway of protecting my savings?
If she runs up any debt when she moves out, will I be liable?

Thanks for taking the time to read.
Andy

paulineb_2

There are people on here who can advise you, but the best advice would come from a lawyer.

fluffnutter

andy9 wrote: »

Hi,

2 weeks ago my wife dropped a bombshell and said she was leaving me, didn't love me anymore and has been having an affair! We have been married just over 4 years and have 2 young children.
After the hurt and anger and once I calmed down, we sat to talk about stuff and have agreed to be as amicable as possible about the split. We will share custody of the children 50/50.

But then the conversation turned to money, and as I have savings and she has nothing, it turned a bit nasty.
We have a house together with about £100K left on the mortgage. House value about £220K.
I have about £30K in savings.
She has already found a house to rent and is talking about a final settlement. She is also talking about a seperation. I would be grateful if anyone knows the answers to the following:

How much is she entitled too?
Is there anyway of protecting my savings?
If she runs up any debt when she moves out, will I be liable?

Thanks for taking the time to read.
Andy

My first thought is that you don't have savings, and 'she has nothing'. You're married, your savings are hers too (as would be the other way round of course). Has she given up work, or taken extended breaks to bring up the children you have together? Having children can seriously impact a woman's earning potential and the idea that the man earns and keeps the money, the 'savings' as you say, is not something that's supported by the law.

Even if you brought these savings to the relationship, they became shared once you married. As to what she's entitled to, that will depend on a number of factors, but the starting point for any negotiation tends to be 50/50 in the UK with particular emphasis on ensuring that the children are supported properly. As to whether she can run up debts that you're liable for, only if said debts relate to a joint loan. For example if you remain on a mortgage together and it's agreed she pays for that mortgage, if she doesn't, you'll both be liable. However, she can't create new debt that you're liable for, e.g. if she takes out a loan in her name alone, it won't be yours to repay if she doesn't.

As in any divorce where you can't agree, get legal advice.

Gigglepig

As a starting point, 1/2 of the total assets (pensions, equity in house, savings....) Plus, to stay in the marital home until the kids are 18 or finish secondary education.

zzzLazyDaisy

andy9 wrote: »

How much is she entitled too?
Is there anyway of protecting my savings?
If she runs up any debt when she moves out, will I be liable?

Thanks for taking the time to read.
Andy

Hello Andy, sorry to hear about your situation. As Paulineb says, the best person to advise you is a divorce lawyer. Many still give a free half hour advice, and seeking advice does NOT mean that you have to start divorce proceedings right now.

Having said that, you may find it helpful to have an idea of how these things are worked out in a divorce.

The first thing to understand is that the law does not look at what is 'yours' and 'hers'. All the matrimonial assets are put into the pot. This includes the house and the savings, regardless of whose name they are in. If you have a pension, this will also be taken into account.

The starting point is a 50/50 split, but there is very often variance from this, depending on the circumstances. You'd need to get legal advice about this, as each case is different.

You should also be aware that, even where care of the children is shared 50/50, there is still one parent who legally has care of the child. That is the parent who receives the child benefit. So if your wife has moved out taking the children with her, and is claiming CB, you will still be liable to pay child maintenance, although this will be discounted by the number of nights the children stay overnight with you. You should check out the CSA website for the calculation, and working on that basis, you may wish to come to an amicable arrangement with your wife to support your children without involving the CSA (bearing in mind either parent can choose to involve the CSA at any time).

You don't say the age of the children, but if there is one child under 5 and your wife is the parent with care, as a single parent she can claim income support and help with rent etc if she is not working. Any child maintenance you pay is ignored for the purposes of tax credits and means tested benefits.

EDIT - you asked about debt. In law any debt that she takes out in her name is her responsibility. However, if you have a joint mortgage or bank account, then you are financially linked so if she defaults it will trash your credit record as well as hers. As far as the financial settlement on divorce is concerned - if the reason (or one of them) for her getting into debt has something to do with your conduct (eg refusing to pay child maintenance) then this may be taken into account when assessing the financial settlement, and the figures can be adjusted to cover or contribute towards those debts

Alpha58

Andy, I have no advice to offer as I have no experience of this and hope I never do - but I'm sorry to hear about it and I wish you the best of luck in resolving it as quickly and painlessly as you can.

I_try

Have a look at the Wikivorce website. That should give you a lot of the answers you are after.

Get all the information you can before doing anything.