Issue with work colleague

tryingtocutback

Not sure where to post this really - hope you can offer some advice.

I had an issue with a work colleague today which resulted in her asking to speak to me away from the team. I was astounded by this since I hadn't done anything wrong - merely asked a question of her that I was asking of everyone in the team (work related). I was then told by her that she was "sick of this inquisition" etc - it turned into a rant which ended with her saying "we shall discuss this with together our respective managers" - I said "good luck with that" since I know for a fact my boss won't be interested in discussing it. This issue really is actually so petty it is unbelievable.

She came over to my desk a bit later to start the whole thing again - raising her voice and saying "we need to sort this out because its upsetting both of us" - I said "Im not upset, I am annoyed". (Actually this "discussion" was really embarrassing to be having in an open plan office.)

This followed her going straight to ask to see her boss - she asked me if I would like to go and discuss this matter with her boss and I said "no thank you".

I have seen her boss since and she said nothing to me.

I have honestly thought about this and hand on heart I am absolutely certain I have done nothing wrong.

What I want some advice with is how to handle her now - its a fairly small team so obvious when there is an atmosphere.

(By the way, this person has some kind of crisis practically weekly and has, to my knowledge, been to HR previously to complain about 2 other people in my team).

Thanks for any advice you can offer.

Rottensocks

If they're a serial complainer, do nothing.

How to handle her now? Exactly the same as you did before.

Person_one

What was the issue? What does she think you've done wrong?

tryingtocutback

Its a bit difficult to explain because its work related but I need to ask people their plans in order to schedule things and she sees this as an "inquisition"

It's the same thing as everyone else is asked though and have been for the last couple of years that she has worked here.

Pixiechic

I agree with rottensocks advice.

It's Friday, hopefully it will all have blown over by Monday morning

Tropez

You're in the same team but have different managers? I would take that to mean that this "team" is either a temporary arrangement (temporary merging of departments, for example), or one of you is superior to the other and so reports to someone different.

It's really quite difficult to say how best to approach things with her specifically without knowing more details. If, for example, you are from a different department and you're questioning everyone in the team on a specific matter, she could be (whether warranted or unwarranted) seeing that as a criticism, depending on the question. I know I wouldn't be too chuffed if someone went around every member of my department asking "Are we REALLY doing things this way?"

But that's just a scenario based on pure speculation.

In general, for work purposes, the best thing to do is just to get on with your work and if she carries on complaining, or pulls you up again just be professional about it but I can't really comment on how to deal with an individual without knowing anything about the grievance.

tryingtocutback

Thanks - actually Im annoyed that it has upset me but wasnt going to admit that to her!

mysk_girl

Is there a chance she hasn't done her planning and is trying to cover up? I have to do this at work, every week provide my forward estimated time plan to the project managers. It's part of my job so others can do theirs? Has she provided the information you require yet?

How very odd...

tryingtocutback

thanks Tropez

She reports to her boss (obviously!) but I report direct to her bosses boss (if that makes sense).

tryingtocutback

my personal view is that she is paranoid - if anyone asks her anything she feels she is being "picked on"

Florence22

It sounds to me as though she is struggling and perhaps has work and home issues which are nothing to do with you.

To cover yourself, start a note for case/diary to remind yourself of how things have unfolded and as a courtesy to your Line Manager email it to her/him for info so that he/she is up to speed with the situation should it escalate.

She is probably just lashing out due to her own issues and unfortunately taking it out on you.
Smile sweetly and ignore....hopefully she will rest up over the weekend, as has been mentioned, and see how childishly she's reacted.

Good luck with her!