Pregnancy related sickness and other complications

amyloofoo

Hi, I work in the NHS (in maternity services) and am currently around 9 weeks pregnant with my first baby :j This is a much wanted and planned baby, but unfortunately I have had some complications with my pregnancy and have already been off work for almost 4 weeks. I have had severe morning sickness, dizziness and fatigue (which at one stage was also accompanied with bleeding and cramping - fortunately that's now settled). I am due to go back to work on Friday, but I just don't think that's going to be possible. At the moment I am unable to function without vomiting or feeling lightheaded, and am just not able to safely care for newborns and Mums in the way they should be.

Our shift patterns at work are either long days or nights, so a total of 12.5 hours per shift with an hour's break for 3 or 4 shifts a week. We often don't get any break at all, and I certainly wouldn't be able to take 15 minutes for small snacks every couple of hours which is what I'm having to try for now. At the moment I struggle to be awake for that amount of time, and certainly aren't able to not vomit or complete the tasks that would be required if I returned to work. Just leaning forward makes me sick, so bathing babies and changing beds is a definite no-no. If I return to work and then am signed off again, this counts as two separate episodes and could be used against me in terms of disciplinaries and sickness records.

My problem is that my manager (who also happens to be a midwife ) is incredibly unsympathetic and seems to think I'm making all of this up. I have explained in detail to her what's happening, and she is also aware that I have Bipolar and issues with anxiety, but she makes comments like "you need to see your GP and get some pills because the ward's understaffed", "you need to come back because you'll be on half pay soon" as well as baldly and repeatedly asking "are you having a miscarriage" without any hint of empathy. She has been this blunt with other staff members who have been off ill, but I can't help thinking that she knows I'm an easy target for bullying because of my anxiety. I understand how difficult it is when the ward's understaffed - it's often me who ends up covering - but I'm not doing this on purpose and I'm already doing everything I can to get better.

I've had 4 calls whilst I've been off, along with 2 answermachine messages - this is after I've let the ward know about my sickness and how long I've been signed off for. I know your manager is entitled to get in touch whilst you're off, but when does this become excessive? It doesn't feel as though she's calling to see how I am, or if there's any way an earlier return can be facilitated - she's simply asking when I'll be back (which she knows) and then is trying to bully / guilt me into returning before I'm well by telling me that the ward is understaffed and that I'll be facing meetings with her when I return. I don't want to cause problems, I love my job normally and would much rather be there than vomiting at home, but how she's behaving is really making me nervous about when I do return.

[Deleted User]

Put yours and the babies health first. Get signed off, and if this woman calls up tell her firmly, or put someone else on the call, that you are unwell and will return on the date given unless further issues. If she doesn't get the message, tell a superior about her rude manner and calls and how it is stressing you at this vulnerable time, and you will hold them (your work) accountable if you miscarry due to stress I can't believe you are being treated like this when you work in maternity services!!

harrys_dad

The NHS will have clear policies on this, and pregnant women have more protection under employment rights than almost any other category of employee. Have you seen the managing staff sickness policy? If not, ask for a copy. Do you belong to a Union? If so, get them involved.

milliemonster

As an NHS nurse myself, I can totally believe how you are being treated, they don't expect us ever to be off sick but when we are working with sick people all the time and having to work long shifts with no breaks you do get run down and pick up anything that's going.

Anyway what I would say is that pregnancy related sickness does not normal count towards your sickness record in the NHS, having said that, of course you want to be reliable and not return to work only to have to go off again after a couple of shifts.

You should have the option of altering your shift pattern to work shorter shifts, discuss this with your line manager if you feel shorter days will enable you to return to work earlier, also if nights are going to be a problem you sould be ale to come off these while you are pregnant.

I sympathise totally, I endured significant pregnancy sickness with my first that didn't pass til 16 weeks and then started with spd at 28 weeks so went off again, being on your feet all day for 12 hours is just totally impossible when you feel so cack.

If your manager won't entertain your ideas for returning to work then just get signed off for longer until you feel well again, it will pass in a few more weeks.

amyloofoo

Thanks guys, I think you've pretty much just confirmed what I thought anyway - I'm going to have to ask for some more time off and / or see what adaptations they're prepared to make to enable me to return. They've not been flexible at all with others who've been off sick (we're not allowed to do shorter days, or reduce the physical aspects of the job), but I am a member of a union so they may be able to intervene on my behalf. As it is, I spent all last night being ill and have only just managed to keep down some water so I don't think I'll be returning on Friday in any case. It just annoys me because I know they're all saying 'pregnancy isn't an illness' and they're right, but I feel pretty ill!

pinkshoes

I suppose you could always turn up and puke all over your manager!?

Or go and see the doctor and get signed off, as your health comes first!

harrys_dad

This is precisely the sort of thing you pay your union subs for. Ring them tmorrow and get them on the case.

amyloofoo

I don't believe it! She's just been back on the phone demanding that I be more forceful with my GP and come back to work now because I have a full time contract and it's inconvenient for me to be at home being sick. Union have been informed :mad:

harrys_dad

Your manager is seriously out of order here. Contact with employees off work through sickness should be covered by some sort of managing staff sickness policy. Do you have a copy? If you are signed off work as ill, and especially as you are pregnant, you should not be allowed to be at work at all, let alone "encouraged to be forceful with your GP".

Hopefully you will receive the support you need from your union.

Bangton

I really feel for you. I'm currently 21 weeks pregnant and have found it really hard with sickness and extreme fatigue lasting up to 16 weeks of pregnancy.
I too found it hard to be off work with anything pregnancy related simply because of the attitude that pregnancy is not an illness. Actually many women are so very poorly. I know my sickness was like nothing I have had in my life. All I could do was lie facing the back of the sofa in a ball till the sickness faded. I didn't take time off work and my productivity was rubbish as I'd be in the toilet or just sitting at my desk feeling like my shoulders wouldn't support my head I was that tired.
I had this constant fear I'd get into trouble over my lack of work/mistakes and I'd be too afraid to say it was down to my pregnancy. So, whilst I don't have practical advise I wanted to offer some support because I do know how you feel. Hopefully you will start to feel better soon. I stopped feeling sick at 13 weeks and the horrific fatigue stopped at 16 weeks. Now though, at 21 weeks I've had small amounts of bleeding and think I have a UTI. This pregnancy lark is hard work and I am sick of people saying it's not an illness when frankly it can cause illness and discomfort!

Morganarla

Takeaway_Addict wrote: »

Whilst I feel for you I do also feel for employers, can you imagine having to pay someone for months of sick pay followed by months of maternity pay, holiday pay etc and for very little to no productivity over what could be a 21 month period and then most likely they request less hours.

That's a lot of money for no work.

What a helpful post.

But please, do go and take your 'advice' elsewhere. I'm sure you can understand how comments like that will not be welcomed.

As a woman who has suffered severe hyperemesis gravidarum, and has been harassed by managers while off sick (which concluded in a criminal record for the manager and a successful official greivance hearing in my favour), you need to stop this for the sake of your baby.

Write to your superior at work and inform them of what your manager is doing and insist that any further contact is in writing and that any uninvited phone calls will be recorded. Speak to to your doctor about the stress you're feeling because of this (you'd be inhuman if you weren't stressed) and get that on record. And speak to your union.

Don't allow petty authority to treat you like this. They have absolutely NO right. None whatsoever.