Save The Date cards - will people reply?

Cuilean

When we ordered our DIY invites, they came with a free pack of pre-printed Save The Date postcards, which were lovely. I sent them out yesterday. Obviously, I should have got myself in gear sooner, as the wedding is only three months away. In my defence, I am new to this, and since the plan is to have a minimal wedding, wasn't even planning on "extravagances" like Save The Date cards. Ah well... :silenced:

Anyway, the plan is to spend my evenings this week making up the invitations, with a view to posting them out in a couple of weeks. There's only about 40 to go out, so that seems doable. However, I'm not sure of the etiquette here, so I'm hoping you guys can help me.

1) Do people reply to Save The Dates? I'm thinking specifically if they can't come. We have a reserve list, just in case.

2) If they tell you they can't come after receiving their Save The Date, would you still send an invitation? I don't want to be seen to be angling for gifts, but also (Perhaps a little naively) I didn't order many invitations, so I don't really have spares to send out.

LEJC

Some might reply as its not far off the wedding date...however I think most will wait for the proper invitation

If someone tells you they cant come as a result of the save the date,then personally I would leave it at that and theres no need to send an invite

I have to admit though ive never replied either way to a save the date.....im one of those who waits for the invite!

gadgeteer_2

No-one replied to our save the date cards. To be fair we never expected them to either.

Saver_Karen

We haven't had any replies to our save the dates but we have had a few people letting us know they'd arrived and saying how much they liked them (I was really pleased becasue I designed them myself).

I assume if anyone couldn't come for sure then they'd let us know now rather than wait for the invite.

lisajane8482

We had people tell us they had received them and were looking forward to the wedding. We also had one couple tell us they wouldn't be able to make it as they were on holiday. When we sent the invitations out we didn't send one to them as we knew they couldn't make it. If i received a save the date i would only reply if i wouldn't be able to go.

74jax

I wouldn't reply to a save the date. They tend to be just that 'hey save this date' if it said 'if you can't make it let me know' then I'd reply.

If someone I knew couldn't attend (either in general conversation or after a save the date) I wouldn't then invite them.......

TeganB_2

I think what I will do is send out save the dates a month or so in advance, then create a Facebook Event where people can say they are attending or not on there, then 4 weeks before the wedding ring anyone who hasn't replied to confirm their food order and that they are coming. Mission complete!

daisiegg

No one replied to our save the dates and we didn't expect them to.

I laughed (affectionately!) at your comment 'I'm new to this' - so are most who plan a wedding unless they have been married before! :rotfl:

Birdie85

People generally don't reply to Save the Dates and TBH (although it's too late since you've sent them) I wouldn't have bothered sending them since your wedding is so close, I'd have just sent out the proper invites. With the cost of stamps as it is it's a shame to spend more than you have to!

The point of a Save the Date is so that people can book the date (if it's during a peak holiday period or mid-week) with a view to receiving a proper invitation with full details nearer to the time. Tegan, If you're not bothering to send a proper invite then it's not so much a Save the Date, more of a not very infomative invite, IYKWIM! By all means do a Facebook event with venue details and area to RSVP but just send proper invites so people know exactly what they've expected to do with it!

RainbowDrops

A few people replied to our save the dates, one or two asking if they needed to send a proper reply confirming they could make it.
It's still a relatively new idea, and a lot of the older generation were confused by it!

katie1812

Save the date cards aren't invitations so in theory they shouldn't really reply! Well nobody replied to mine lol! I think they are mainly just literally so,people know in advance when the wedding is incase they need to book the day off etc. as for whether to send an invitation, I don't really know... I guess it's a waste of time if they and you know they can't come, but would they feel,left out if you didn't. To be honest I don't think I would but it depends on your guests!