Not inviting family members...

lindsaygalaxy

I wont be inviting my sister and her bf to my wedding, should it ever happen. I know it will upset people though they will still come. But, we are not friends, we never talk, haven't for years.

Stephb1986_2

I'm not inviting my brother either because he always spoils any family occasion this is one day he isn't going to spoil!

ska_lover

I would never invite this person in a million years.

scotsh

Whatever you decide make sure you will be happy on your day as you don't want to be worrying about what might happen and not enjoy it.

Bella73

I invited my parents because people told me I would regret not having them there. God how wrong people can people be, they were their usual ...... Like selves and even four years on I wish I hadn't invited them.

So if I had my time again I wouldn't invite anyone I didn't want.

RuthnJasper

Nope - your day, your way. That's what I personally believe, anyway.

I have an unpleasant aunt and her even-more unpleasant daughter, who have revelled in creating "atmospheres" at family events for years. They regularly reduced my mother (aunt's sister) to tears even in 'phone conversations - which is something very rare for my mum, who's built of strong stuff.

They managed to upstage another cousin's wedding by standing up immediately after the bride's father's (mum's brother) speech and announcing their OWN "good news" that the nasty cousin was pregnant by someone who was already married. Awful, totally inappropriate and embarrassing.

They just about behaved themselves at my brother's wedding a few years ago, but that was only because they were in awe of the wealthy (and REALLY lovely) family into which my brother was marrying and because my brother's big and strong university friends were all there as ushers, so they didn't dare start anything. In the event, they just sat at their table, muttering darkly together and complaining about the food (which they had chosen from the menu before-hand! :wall: )

DubPrincess - it sounds like you and your fiance are in agreement on this, which is an excellent starting-point. Play to your intuitions, don't invite them. It will prey on your mind and spoil your preparations for your special day - EVEN if they DO behave themselves on the day itself. You are right - it is YOUR special day, for you and your fiance to celebrate your marriage and the love that you have for each other. If some people cannot see through their own petty grumblings in order to celebrate sincerely along with you and all those who genuinely care about the both of you, then that is THEIR problem, not yours.

And if they ask why they weren't invited, you can either tell them exactly why or mumble something about being "strictly limited as to numbers". It's inevitable that some problems will always come tapping at your door throughout life - but that DOESN'T mean that you have to open the door and welcome them in.

I wish you every success and happiness for a lovely day and a long and successful marriage. xx

DubPrincess

Thank you so much for even more lovely helpful replies! I was fairly set on my decision but hearing other people having the same issues makes me feel not so much the villain in all of this! Thank you xxx

sexybabe1982

It's a hard decision to make but ultimately it's YOUR wedding day and you should be able to invite who you want to.
We had exactly the same situation - I hardly speak to my mums brothers children (cousins), in fact they go out of their way to avoid me, make me feel awkward and treat my mum, nan and the rest of our family like dirt, only ever showing their faces when they want something. So it seemed an easy decision to not invite them to our wedding, as they would have made everyone feel awkward and resulted in closer family members (and myself) having the day spoiled. As a result my uncle (their dad) decided he wouldn't come in protest. This upset my nan a bit, but it was his decision as he was invited so not my problem.
It certainly didn't spoil our day, everything was perfect and all the people who I wanted to be there, were there. If they had have been there I am sure they would have done something to spoil it!

Sorry for writing so much, I just wanted to tell you my experience and the outcome, so it will hopefully help you. Good luck and whatever you decide remember - it's YOUR day!