School politics and a headmistress who couldn't care less

Broken_hearted

My youngest son was due to go on a school trip on Wed and parents were invited to go too. So me and my son organised to go.
Then on Friday there was a disagreement with the class teacher and suddenly there isn't space for me on the school trip. My little one has cried his heart out all night, so we tried to speak to headmistress tonight and she just blanked us. Infact she was downright rude. Claims to have known nothing about me going which is funny because I go on every trip and it was on the forms we sent back plus we confirmed it with the school secretary again last week.
I think it's spiteful and childish of them to do this, using a five year old to punish a parent for complaining.:mad:

Nenen

What was the disagreement with the class teacher about?

Broken_hearted

Nothing much DS was acting up on a breaktime and upsetting other children so I asked the teacher to keep him in on a breaktime. I wanted him to understand that if he didn't play nicely then he couldn't play at all. The answer I got back was she was entitled to her break. So I said fine 'make a rod for your own back' and walked off', round to see headmistress I even offered to come and sit with him so they didn't have too.

stamford

Broken_hearted wrote: »

My youngest son was due to go on a school trip on Wed and parents were invited to go too. So me and my son organised to go.
Then on Friday there was a disagreement with the class teacher and suddenly there isn't space for me on the school trip. My little one has cried his heart out all night, so we tried to speak to headmistress tonight and she just blanked us. Infact she was downright rude. Claims to have known nothing about me going which is funny because I go on every trip and it was on the forms we sent back plus we confirmed it with the school secretary again last week.
I think it's spiteful and childish of them to do this, using a five year old to punish a parent for complaining.:mad:

You could consider complaining to the School Governors about the actions and attitudes of both members of staff

Nenen

Broken_hearted wrote: »

Nothing much DS was acting up on a breaktime and upsetting other children so I asked the teacher to keep him in on a breaktime. I wanted him to understand that if he didn't play nicely then he couldn't play at all. The answer I got back was she was entitled to her break. So I said fine 'make a rod for your own back' and walked off', round to see headmistress I even offered to come and sit with him so they didn't have too.

Was this said in front of your ds or other children?

poe.tuesday

straight to the governors if I was you and put it in writting too

Carmina_Piranha_3

in our school they all have to sit in the hall, facing the wall and not speaking - evenly spaced out. even the 4 year olds :eek:

they don't actually have supervision, but the staff room is adjacent and there are always staff walking through the hall so nobody dare misbehave.

i can see why a teacher would want her break rather than detention duty but perhaps if they put all the detention kids together they could have a supervision rota.

but .... if you argued publicly with a member of staff they wouldn't want you as a parent helper i don't suppose.

Broken_hearted

I didn't argue publicly there was only DH, DS's and myself there. As a teaching assistant I spent plenty of time supervising children doing lines or unfinished classwork so I know what its like to give up your break. It never bothered me thats what i was there for.
I'm just very worried if she can't control him on the yard how can she control him in a strange place. He is still frightened since he got lost at Easter and won't go to strangers so it would need to be the teacher he stayed with.
Even if they thought I behaved inapropriatly (I didn't) then they could have been honest and said we don't want you there.
DS is very upset as are the rest of the family, we are waiting to speak govenors leason officer this morning.

MortgageMamma

This sounds very unfair to me - the teacher was somewhat unreasonable in my opinion. My best friend is a school teacher and they have a rota of who looks after the children who are kept in a break times. You are quite right to complain about the way you have been treated.

spoilt_BUT_appreciate_it

Why is it they we are made to feel like we're the child being told off, like we're the ones in fact back at school.. and then you feel terrible for the rest of the day!

I have wondered before whether it has been the tone in which I have said something that has upset someone before... you know perhaps I come across as a bossy parent telling the teacher how to do their job.. who knows

Nicki

Perhaps the teacher felt you undermined her in front of your son? Even so, there should be better ways of her dealing with it. Alternatively if you go on all the trips, perhaps other mothers have complained about being left out, and they had already decided you couldn't go and the timing of telling you is coincidental. In my child's school there are always a lot more parents who want to go on trips than there are places, and we have to share it out between us.

If your child will be unable to go on the trip without you, due to either special needs, medical needs or extreme anxiety, then I think it is fair enough that you should be allowed to go. If its just that he will have to be in the teacher's group rather than one of the other groups, then its more difficult to argue you need to be there. One way to make yourself feel better might be that if he does go without you and enjoys it, it will have helped him with his self-confidence.