How to survive!

kirsti13_2

This isn't so much a question more a need to vent!

So when my OH and i decided to buy a house we thought it would be reasonably straight forward!

We put an offer in 15th Jan and we still haven't even exchanged when we offered we were told the vendors were chain free but a few weeks later we were finally told they were buying somewhere else...then the house they are buying is due to a marital split so that will obviously take longer...but now the searches are done on both house, all mortgages are sorted and still nothing!

I understand things take time but hate not knowing what is happening, only being told the bare minimum of info and having our lives on hold for over 4 months...

The thought of starting this all over again terrifies me so have no intention of walking away but how to you cope with all of the stress, worry and uncertainty??

Think i will just have to try and completely forget that we are even buying a house and not think about it at all

So how to you keep yourself happy and not go crazy?

mummyroysof3

Oh wow no wonder you are stressed. I hope it all comes together for you soon

dotdash79

3 - 4 months is standard for a house buying process, the estate agent should be keeping you informed.

How much pressure are you applying to people, some people deal with the ones that shout loudest first.

ruggedtoast

Man up.

.....

mjdh1957

kirsti13 wrote: »

So when my OH and i decided to buy a house we thought it would be reasonably straight forward!

This was your first mistake.

Almost everyone I know who has bought a house has found it stressful. It ranks up beside divorce and bereavement as one of the most stressful things you can do.

At least you aren't selling one at the same time. Double the stress and heartache....

kirsti13_2

ruggedtoast wrote: »

Man up.

.....

haha i figured that would be the answer. I think it is because we have moved so many times (5 times in 7/8 years) in rentals i am so used to things happening so really quickly. I am far to much of a control freak for house buying. When i get the keys i am never ever moving again!:D

knightstyle

We have had similar time frames. The only thing you can do is to ring your solicitor and the estate agent every week to push them. Often the delay is caused by them not getting or passing on vital information.
We had a solicitor sitting on replies to searches for 6 weeks before passing them on!
Also get chatty with the solicitors clerk, they can really speed things up!

lessonlearned

As above.

Pick up the phone and get chasing.

The solicitor will generally not take too kindly to being "pestered" however their assistant/clerk will be able to tell you everything you need to know.

Also your lender/broker and the Vendors EA.

When you phone them ask for updates and always ask them the same question

"Is there anything you need me to do at this stage".

Be pro-active and push, push, push.

You have already spent a lot of money, don't let your purchase slip through your fingers.

And yes, once you've got your keys you will be able to laugh at this.

One day you will have forgotten all the pain and you will move again.

Yes moving is well up there on the stress-o-meter of life. As others have pointed out at least you are not trying to juggle a sale and a purchase at the same time.

One transaction at a time is easy peasy........:rotfl:

antw23uk

Best thing i ever did when we had our offer accepted was to send a 'Thank you' card to the owners we were buying from ...(Thank you for accepting our offer on your beautiful home blah blah blah)
Happened to put our phone number in there as well so when they phoned to say what a lovely gesture it was we stayed in contact and kept each other informed regardless of what utter bull the estate agents kept coming out with! :mad: Eg. Vendors were told we couldnt complete on so and so date because we were on holiday!!! ... Which was suprising as we didnt have a holiday booked!

We have been in the house three years in September and still stay in contact with them which reminds me its our turn to invite them for dinner

Good luck, and if its not too far why not pop round and chat to them direct?

hazyjo

mjdh1957 wrote: »

Almost everyone I know who has bought a house has found it stressful. It ranks up beside divorce and bereavement as one of the most stressful things you can do.

At least you aren't selling one at the same time. Double the stress and heartache....

Sold my my house and my (now ex) husband's flat in 2011 and bought a house together. Over the next two years, both our lovely dads died, my beloved cat had to be put to sleep, we got divorced and re-sold the house (I have just bought another one).

So, yep, I can confirm it's about as stressful as it gets! :eek: Still managing to keep a smile on my face (just!).

FIVE LONG MONTHS to buy our house together. Painful and stressful beyond belief. 16 weeks for the sale to go through. 11 weeks for me to buy mine (thankfully just about caught up with the sale and completed on both on same day (last week)).

Good luck!

Jx

R_P_W

antw23uk wrote: »

Best thing i ever did when we had our offer accepted was to send a 'Thank you' card to the owners we were buying from ...(Thank you for accepting our offer on your beautiful home blah blah blah)
Happened to put our phone number in there as well so when they phoned to say what a lovely gesture it was we stayed in contact and kept each other informed regardless of what utter bull the estate agents kept coming out with! :mad: Eg. Vendors were told we couldnt complete on so and so date because we were on holiday!!! ... Which was suprising as we didnt have a holiday booked!

We have been in the house three years in September and still stay in contact with them which reminds me its our turn to invite them for dinner

Good luck, and if its not too far why not pop round and chat to them direct?

How odd. You sent them a card thanking them for accepting your money?