The Samaritans - has anyone ever talked to them?

ognum

C_Mababejive wrote: »

I am lost as to the point of phoning up someone only for them to listen and hum and had every now and again without providing any useful input. I might as well talk to my Teddy !

Interesting point, that is exactly what most people say until everything around them crumbles, then sometimes not always they need some outside help.

Of course I hope this will never happen to you but I have worked with many many people who have said exactly what you are saying now so as I said before if you do need it then it's there!

iamashoppingaddict

Crikey, I didn't realise this thread was still going. Its been really lovely to read other peoples experiences and know that the samaritans helped them.

Last week they did help me. I didn't go any further in finding any other service as actually after I had a sleep last week I found myself waking up a bit less fraught. The stomach churning feeling had gone away and found that off loading onto someone who didn't want to chip in with their opinion every time I finished a sentence (like some family members want to do) was really actually what I needed.

I went to the samaritans charity shop the next day, was only really passing by chance to be honest. Never really looked at it before, but I went in and bought a lovely dress. So they helped me twice, with the dress and the listening. Hopefully my small donation back will help them carry on being able to help people.

rpc

ognum wrote: »

Interesting point, that is exactly what most people say until everything around them crumbles, then sometimes not always they need some outside help.

This a million times over.

It is very hard to understand what people need and how they behave if you do not have experience of going into a dark place yourself (or watching someone close to you do it).

Even having watched it happen to someone else, I still can't really say I understand all of it but at least I know what I do and don't understand!

Person_one

C_Mababejive wrote: »

Maybe im made of sterner stuff but in those scenarios, I'd just suck it up and drive forward..take the pain..

I sincerely hope you never have to find out if that's true.

Its interesting though, attitudes like this are part of the reason why suicide rates are so high amongst young men. Admitting to feeling depressed, to struggling, to not coping is not the 'manly' thing to do, bottling it all up and putting on a tough guy front is what's expected of them.

What would your response be if a friend came to you and said "Mate, everything's getting on top of me, I'm really low, can we talk about it?"

Bryando

Phoned them once as wanted somebody when I jumped off a bridge. They were not bothered trying to to get my location etc, which I believe raised a few questions. I lacked capacity to make the decision to kill myself.

I used to also phone Breathing Space and always got pushed towards them than Samaritans.

Not used Breathing Space in years, but they saved my life a good few times to be honest!

Person_one

Bryando wrote: »

Phoned them once as wanted somebody when I jumped off a bridge. They were not bothered trying to to get my location etc, which I believe raised a few questions. I lacked capacity to make the decision to kill myself.

They aren't supposed to. If word got around that they try to track people down and stop them, people would stop ringing at the time when they need help the most.

This is from their website:

The Values

We are committed to the following values:

• Listening, because exploring feelings alleviates distress and helps people to reach a better understanding of their situation and the options open to them
  
• Confidentiality, because if people feel safe, they are more likely to be open about their feelings
  
• People making their own decisions wherever possible, because we believe that people have the right to find their own solution and telling people what to do takes responsibility away from them
  
• Being non-judgemental, because we want people to be able to talk to us without fear of prejudice or rejection
  
• Human contact, because giving people time, undivided attention and empathy meets a fundamental emotional need and reduces distress and despair

C_Mababejive

Person_one wrote: »

I sincerely hope you never have to find out if that's true.

Its interesting though, attitudes like this are part of the reason why suicide rates are so high amongst young men. Admitting to feeling depressed, to struggling, to not coping is not the 'manly' thing to do, bottling it all up and putting on a tough guy front is what's expected of them.

What would your response be if a friend came to you and said "Mate, everything's getting on top of me, I'm really low, can we talk about it?"

Oh believe me,,my life has not been sweetness,light and roses round the door. I just have a survive or die attitude. I do have a mate who says such things to me and i do afford him succour. After a while it stresses me as i feel like im just being used as a dumpster for his negative emotions and he doesnt fix his issues anyway.

System

Person_one wrote: »

They are exactly the right people to call if you're feeling suicidal!

Sorry you got one who didn't seem to know what he was doing. There are so many of them up and down the country I suppose some must be better than others, inevitably.

There probably are. In fairness i was very lucky i had friends who found me and looked after me that night so i was ok in the end . I hope never to need the help again, but if i felt down and needed to talk i probably would consider the Samratains.

Thinking about it the crisis team were useless at the time i needed them (i was suicidal but because i'd admitted to having ONE glass of wine earlier that night they wouldn't come out )

Slightly unrelated but when i was about 16 i was in a bad way and needed to talk to someone and called Childline. They were brilliant with me and gave me the confidence to see my GP and get help. So i do think helplines are an invalueble service