Autism - what signs did you see in your children?

sulkisu

I just wanted to update on this. My son underwent a number of tests and checks and although he has a speech delay (which I already knew), the consensus of opinion is that he is not autistic.
The first doctor to test him diagnosed a moderate development delay (she assessed him as being approximately one year behind where he should be in motor and cognitive skills). So basically on par with a 16 month old at the time.

I disagreed. My son took an instant dislike to her after she snapped at him for sucking his thumb :mad:, and he refused point blank to co-operate. Fortunately I insisted on and got a second opinion. We had a second check-up, where the doctor was much warmer and friendlier and my son did everything that was asked of him. He counts to 20 and recognises the numbers, he knows his colours, body parts and followed instructions.
He had a follow up appointment today with a colleague of the second doctor, just to be sure.
They all ran through a long checklist of things including his diet, routine, behaviours etc, plus other tests and all three doctors concluded that he is not autistic. I just burst into tears. Funnily enough his speech, while still behind, has really developed these past few months. He is now making 3-4 word sentences for example, although most of the time it's 2 words, and his vocabulary is over 300 words.

However, I feel guilty for feeling so relieved that he is not Autistic . He's my son and I would love him the same regardless, but it is such a weight off of our shoulders (apologies if I have offended anyone).

meritaten

You certainly shouldn't have offended anyone - who wouldn't be mightily relieved to know their child DIDNT have a condition which can be 'challenging' to say the least. Yes we adore our Aspie/asd kids and grandkids - but, their life is not easy by any standards.

fluffnutter

Thanks for the update, sulkisu, and don't feel guilty that you're relieved your son doesn't appear to have autism.

Can I suggest a couple of things from a language point of view. No doubt you're doing all of this already but just in case you're not... in your opening post you mention that he strung together 'telly turn on'. TV's not the demon many people make it out to be and a small amount each day can be great for kids, but for children whose speech is delayed, it's not particularly helpful. The dialogue in children's telly tends to be quite fast, sometimes nonsensical (e.g. tellytubbies) and, most importantly, not really directed at the child watching. It's easier to pick up speech if we can hear and see the person speaking to us and this speech is calm and measured.

If he does make mistakes when speaking, such as pronouncing words wrong, just repeat them back to him gently. Don't admonish him or anything like that (I'm sure you don't) but it's important that he hears correctly phrased words and sentences.

I'm really pleased to hear he's doing well. He'll catch up in no time

smileforlife

with my son, he was slower with milestones. didnt sit until 9 months. was very unsettled as a baby. crying..feeding...crying...feeding. as a toddler, never sat still...always wanting food. very easily distracted. short attention span. slept way too much. never played. throwing toys and breaking them, or eating them. never played. never imaginary played. mother and toddler groups, circle time, never sat on my knee laughing with the other babies and enjoying nursery rhymes. running from one table to another from one activity to the next, leaving them unfinished. silly behaviour at about age 3..like eating his lunch under the table, whilst all the other children sat on the chairs around the table. he would cry if he was made to come out. very clumsy. not getting nappy training, he was 4 when out of nappies daytime. and 5-6 at night.
general behaviour/anger problems with my sons autism. he is 9 now.
slow at talking. age 3 only saying mama and dada and ball. then one day he woke with a full vocabulary, like he had memorised a dictionary over night. yet he would use the big words in the right context but didnt know what it meant. fly's...he was so agrivated by them, still is now. anything that moves. dogs etc. when we would go in to town on the bus, the hydraulics would make him so upset, he would cover his ears and rock back and forth. oh i forgot... one of the main reasons i thought he was autistic was he use to rock back and forth on hands and knees or upright in his cot. he had scabs down his spine for about 2 years from the verosity he used. then his behaviour got so bad i didnt go anywhere, no playgroups, no friends houses. then the nursery at age 3 said they think he has developmental delay and we had a appointment with peaditrition who said he has global developmental delay. and social interaction and communications problems, and plagiocephaly ( flattening of the head/ birth trauma) and to be seen in 6 mths. again, same diagnosis. started school...then the ball got rolling, from the end of day 1 he had a 1 on 1 T.A. and they made the calls etc. then it went to panel and within a year i think we had a diagnosis of ASD aspergers with possible ADHD to be explored. he was age 7 on his diagnosis. now age 9. adhd ruled out. tho i dont agree.
we had a awful year with his autism last year. we had to move house, he had to move schools, a new T.A , then his dad didnt see him. all resulted in me on very strong antidepressants, and me calling mental health pleading with them to help him. he was suicidal. but........he is now over the hump, and happier than ever. and i am too. he is having therapy with a charity in our town,and he loves this, they taught him how to retrain his brain with stressballs etc. it works. after 9 years of fighting for what i knew my son needed really paid off. i was at rock bottom, and desperate. but then i almost lost everythiing, and i bumped back, and now i appreciate every single day, and dont bother complaining now, the way i see it is, the more upset i get the more miserable i am, so if i dont allow people to upset me, i am happy. that works too.
autism is a life long condition, childhood is the hardest, you need a social worker from your local disibility team involved, and join your local childrens centre. the 'kids' charity run up ans down the country and they are amazing with children on the spectrum. accept all the help you can, but dont over yourself with people. always keep a book with a page for each organisation you speak with, the time, date there names and a little summary of the phonecall. i didnt do this until last year and i felt so cluttered in my mind. now if someone rings me i say get my notebook out and go to the page (from contents page, haha) and i instantly remember who it is, and the previous convo' we had. you soon then find you will feel in control, and organised, and your child will see this, and feed off your positive energy. i never believed in any of that, until i was that desperate i decided to try anything, looking at the world through my sons eyes........study....study....study.... the best books on amazon, cheap as chips . i now see the 'moments' he has from his eyes. and i am firm, i use single words, and give orders, weather it be in a not so happy tone...or a lovely sweet tone. he doesnt understand 'sayings' if you was to say 'dont run on ahead' he would reply with 'why would i run on her head', and point to his sisters head....thinking i meant he would run over her head. he takes everything literally. time schedule. if i say 'were going out at 9' it would strike 9 and he would be stood at the door. if i say 'wait, i just need to put the bin out' he would be upset as the whole outing is ruined bu being 1 min off schedule. from the outside looking in basicly, it looks like i am raising a spoiled child. but its far from it. autistic children need a strict boundry, as if you give them longer they meltdown..last night ...'time for bed at 8;30, i will be up to tuck you in' ...9;10pm... i was late as i live paused my tv whilst the phone rang. he was distraut. even tho he would have loved 'extra time' because it wasnt planned, he again. was off schedule. so i have to see it in his eyes. then you understand your son inside and out.
my other children however, would be giggling as they had 10 mins more.
i know i am waffling on, but when i was after advice for autism, all i got was professional words as i call them, and not personal experiences. once i read things about other peoples children being like mine, i knew it wasnt me letting him have his own way, my other 3 children are not this way and all loved and brought up the same, i knew i wasnt alone. support....support.....support, i can not stress enough that support is there, and you will need it.
please feel free to pm me if you want to talk, i will be glad to help xxxx

marisco_2

I could have written your post almost word for word a few years back OP. My youngest son was very similar to yours at the same age. He is nearly 8 now, a fluent speaker, fine in all social situations and doesn't show any signs of being autistic. Children develop at their own pace in all developmental areas. Some babble and have broken speech which gradually forms correctly. Others sit back, take it all in and start talking in almost full sentences straight off when they are good and ready. Seeming to be a bit selective about who they play with is quite normal in children at this age too. Just like adults he will understand to a degree who he wants to mix with.

Frith

Sulkisu - good to hear your son is coming on in leaps and bounds (and no offence taken here either!)

raq

emsywoo123 wrote: »

DS (29 months) is currently obsessed with Chuggington on the TV and Thomas the Tank on the iPad. Have to be really strict with limiting the time or I fear he would be there all day!!

And no autistic spectrum suspicions with him, so I agree.

I agree with you guys yet only this week my health visitor actually mentioned the professionals "ALWAYS" states this is a sign.