every day is a battle getting DD to sleep, help?

morocha

I have a 5yo DD( she will be 6 in June) and every single day is a battle to put her to sleep, she is adhd.
we put her in bed at 8.30, she will not go down until 10. Keeps saying she is not tired, is hungry, is thristy, is scared etc....
we address each one of these issues and it comes down to Iam scared, can not sleep.

any suggestions ?

BitterAndTwisted

Why are you addressing each of these issues when they occur rather than preempting them?

Not being tired is fine. Sometimes I'm not either. I'd allow the child to read a book or play quietly with their toys as long as they stay in their room.

Gillyx

How is the ADHD treated? Meds? Diet?

Agree with B&T, make sure she has had a drink/bite to eat before going to bed. Is she scared of the dark? Could you get a night light?

8.30 is quite late for bed time, could she be over tired?

elmer

My son would not go to sleep until 11.00, but he shared a room with his sister who needed her sleep,
so he was allowed a night light and as many books as he wanted, but he wasnt allowed to get up.

elmer

natbags

My son has ADHD (11yo) and bedtime has always been a nightmare
Things to try; lavender oil on pillow, Johnsons lavender bath foam, Blackout blind & curtains, a dull ish lamp (as in not too bright), hot milky drink and hour or so before bedtime
Routine is sooooo important with ADHD so its important to have the same routine (as in PJ's on, Teeth clean etc...) and getting them into bed before bedtime, a good 10 - 15 mins, and putting to bed with a story, or reading a book (even just pictures) all help to wind down Failing that, if they have meds and regular Drs appointments for ADHD then 'circadin' may be possible? HTH

gonzo127

i agree with pre empting these things, and also DO NOT engage with her as thats keeping her active and also giving her what she wants (your attention)

my little one (5 aswell) has a simple bed time routine which follows

give her 5-10 mins warning of bath/shower time (roughly 6:45 - 7pm)
upstairs and have a wash, once out and dried off ask if she is hungry, if so something like a banana, slice of toast (basically something simple, non acidic and not really exciting) but also she knows that once her teeth have been brushed there is no further food.
story time either whilst she eats a little something or just cuddled up
then brush teeth and into bed,

we have a basic 'sports' bottle (one with a built in straw) of plain water at the side of her bed
then little night light on for a tiny bit of light and i put on some relaxing music on low on her stero (i like enya) so that she can just close her eyes and listen to the music

basically with the above i find i have pre empted most things - food, drink, light, cant get to sleep (just listen to your music then) etc

then if she shouts for me, i will go in and ask what is wrong, if its just her playing up/being silly etc i just dismiss it in a relevant but short way 'ok thats nice, now go to sleep night night' and leave with no further comment or discussion.

and that seems to work for me, dont knwo if it will help you but as stated i try to pre empt these things but also do not really respond to her if she shouts for me

j.e.j.

Some foods, like a banana or a cup of warm milk are supposed to be sleep-inducing.

jenhug

Ask her consultant about melatonin. Its the sleep hormone these children (mine included) don't produce enough of, or produce at the wrong time. It is natural and a Godsend I can tell you!

morocha

Thanks, i am taking notes of suggestions.

My daughter is over emotional, when all her needs are cover but still wants attention, she will not stop with the putting back to bed and no talking approach, she will cry her eyes out, she will bang doors, she will shout for hours is like she completely looses it. My daughter has seen many people, many apps but because they do not want to label her, she only gets a bit of help at school but no medice, although my husband does not want to go down that route.
My husband has Adhd( he was diagnosed as a child), so he is another one that needs to be occupied all the time, comes to bed time he is shattered and wants to rest, she is not, I am guessing is has to do with the fact that we have a new baby and she is not receiving all the attention as she used to.

She has a bed lamp, special one, not too bright, we cover all her needs before bed time, but it comes to the moment of getting into bed and she wants food, not a little snack and wants drinks etc...any excuse she can think of to stay up.

BitterAndTwisted

In which case the baby needs to be put down to sleep before your daughter's bed-time. Then she will have some of Mummy & Daddy's undivided attention before it's her turn

Firefly

You need to watch Channel 4 Bedtime Live. It was a very good insight into how children train parents. Stick with it and watch all episodes and you'll get the hang of how to train your child. It's available on 4OD.