Advice on BR.

itsMy_Money

Family in Debt - Not your faults redunancy is a big shock esp ,multiple times and he is qualified! with loving parents who care about them, they will be fine! although a bit cramped move back into inlaws - might help their money as well- as every one is in tough times- hope things get better xx

alastairq

We would like to think we could make a fresh start and rebuild but feel it looks bleak at present and we are united as a couple to make the best of a bad situation.

Hi..the above from your first post.

Given that the general downturn of the economy has affected you as a family, [and bear in mind, the consensus appears to be that the economy will not recover to where it was ten years ago....for possibly decades?].... just how much of a fresh start are you both prepared to take?


From your posts you feel your present lifestyle will be unsustainable for the foreseeable future....so is it perhaps time to consider more radical changes, other than the more woeful one's?

Are you certain your OH's work does not permit BR?


And if not...what about a complete career change?

[I hate the word 'career'...it carries so much baggage, and is totally inflexible]

Maybe a move from your current area to one where rents, for example, and more realistic for you financially?

AT the end of the day..... we have arrived at a situation, not of our making..where we will have to review our work ethic.

Work is work.....within reason, whatever it happens to be, if it puts bread on the table and a roof over one's head, it must be good.

For example, if one or both of you could stomach a complete change of course,work-wise.....then BR becomes a real possibility, and advantage can be taken of the opportunities BR can present.

For the moment, the important thing is to keep the family together.

MAybe it is time to consider walking away from the lifestyle once aspired to....but sadly being denied......and take a more basic, fundamental view of how to move forward?

Education, skills and experience are never wasted....even if restricted from using them by circumstance.

Trying to be positive here

Polly_Wolly_Doodle

Hi,
Our experience is that BR isn't half as bad as you fear.
We have three young children too and i am in a profession that shouldn't go BR, i had to appeal but funnily enough when it came to losing my annual subscription they agreed it was all down to housing and bad timing and nothing fraudulant etc they allowed me to stay on the register!!

Housing, we got to stay on in our house as the equity is small and after the OR costs of moving us etc it would have not been worth their while. We are interest only on the mortgage and we'll see where that goes in the future but for us that gave us some stability for the children.
Not sure it was the right arguement but in actual fact we are 'buying' for massively less than we could rent, so more money to the creditors.
Good luck.

lonestarfan

Family in debt - just to reassure you - as Pippa says in her post - if its because you weren't able to pay the mortgage then you're not intentionally making yourself homeless so the council will help house you and the children so you won't be on the street. But they may house you in a way you don't feel comfortable with eg a hostel. So perhaps a way for you to be able to exercise some control over your housing would be to find a private rented house and claim housing benefit.
But to get Housing benefit I think you have to be on a very low income or without an income & on benefits.
Secondly the poster from national debt made a good point about contacting shelter as they know more and also to investigate if you really will lose the house because if it's in negative equity then the national debt poster said you might be ok to stay there. Polly wolly doddle has that experience.
Then you might be able to get support with mortgage interest (SMI).
To get SMI you have to have a mortgage.
To get housing benefit you have to have a rental place.
The benefits boards on here are good so take a look.
My cousin had to have an IVA & had his house repossessed. he didn't want to be in a hostel or B&B with his son so he private rented with the help of housing benefit. He was only entitled to a 2 bed housing allowance (as theres only him & his young son). My sisters neighbour went bankrupt last year & is still able to keep the house for a while - so there are possibilities.
A girl at work went bankrupt 20 years ago (i expect it was a bit different then) with a young child. She's always lived in rented with her daughter since.
You sound like a really good mum, looking out for her kids. I think if you get your housing sorted then they'll be settled and they'll be fine if you talk to them about why they can't have things if money is short as its all part of their education.
I personally wouldn't move in with my family as it can be stressful & may replace the money stress with an equally stressful situation.

Ox1987

Polly what profession are you in just curious as I am in a similar position

coolcait

Ox1987 wrote: »

Polly what profession are you in just curious as I am in a similar position

That was good timing, Ox.

I was just about to post links to your two threads, as they also have a lot of excellent information, advice and support which could be helpful to the OP and her OH.

Not just on the practical level, but also on the emotional level - worries about the impact on children and so on.

Here they are;

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4517631=


https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4514865=

Ox1987

See I am becoming the advisor, though as i was aware they would not leave them in a hostel long term and they would jump up the priority. The benefit of going to inlaws or friends is you can add the overcrowding angle to the argument

Ox1987

I hope all is well with you and you are working on your problem

lonestarfan

I've been thinking about you today & hope you've been able to get some more information to help you. Best wishes x.

Family_in_debt...

So after a long hard review over the weekend it looks like BR is our best option to try and start again.
Still worried about the Kids and also the housing situation I dont fancy being in a hostel long term with the kids, Will I be able to claim housing benefit and potentially get a house.
I am also concerned that with the benefits we get will we even be able to feed the children and make sure they go to school. Two are school age. OH will try and get any work but seems like when he puts his CV into low income jobs, the interviews are a farce as if they are laughing at him. He does not care just wants to provide for us.

It is really getting us down very bad, I know that the kids are better off with us but I am finding it hard to believe it