Top tips/secrets needed for new parents

honeypop

I would like your help fellow MSE'ers...
My sister is due to give birth to first baby in August and has done loads of reading on what to expect etc... but I think there must be lots of things the books/leaflets don't tell you that you do eventually work out for yourself but wish someone had told you beforehand. I am talking about everything after the birth itself, dealing with the baby not the pregnancy.

Instead of buying the parents or baby a gift I am planning to put together a little book of handy tips and hints of how to cope with certain things, little shortcuts that may be taken (if any!!), and general advice really. Something along the lines of the thread "Pregnancy's Best Kept Secrets" would be great. That thread was great for her to hear things about the pregnancy/birth/after birth and to prepare her for a LOT of things she hadn't been told about!

Now, I am at the disadvantage of not yet having children (I am hot on her heels though!) therefore I don't have any tips myself. So could I please tap into your wisdom and get some tips/secrets new parents should know? Ideally things relating from birth to say 2 years old?

Or for a separate section of my handy book, things to get done while baby sleeps or when you get a spare 10 mins? (My ones for this include taking a relaxing bath/having 'mummy' time doing things like facepack, file nails etc).

I know you are all full of great ideas...:j

3KIDSNOMONEY

I am sure that lots of people will reply with 'enjoy it'. Everyone says it to you but when you have a baby you want everything to be perfect and before you know if you have a 3 year old. So 'enjoy every minute' would be my tip.

Also don't buy too much, that means toys, clothes, christmas presents. You will live to regret it when the house is full and it takes far more tidying, cleaning. etc.

heather38

oh i love talking about babies, mine is 6 months so i can only go upto this age!
newborn age - babies sleep between 16 and 20 hours a day so relax in a nice bath or watch tv don't worry about the house work, visitors don't care what your house looks like.
try different kinds of nappies as they are different shapes esp between the legs and they leak if they don't fit properly.
buy plenty of those bags that shrink when you vacuum them for all the clothes that you'll get through.
you don't need loads of baby toiletries, i have a bottle of baby shampoo and have only used half of it in six months.
keep a stock of nappies/wipes/nappy bags and a change of clothes downstairs as you don't want to go all the way upstairs to change a pooey bum.
baby vests can be taken off downwards over the bum rather than over the head as they scretch wide at the neck. handy to know when it's covered in poo.
weaning stage - banana stains everything, as does butternut squash.
when you swap to bottles (if you've been breastfeeding) get your baby used to drinking formula at room temp then you don't need to warm the milk when it comes to feeding time (handy when you have a screaming hungry baby).
i have a teething ting in the fridge in a tub of milton at all times, handy when sore gums need soothing.
baby socks never fit and you will always lose one.
will come back when i think of more.

dianadors

Dont forget your husband/partner. They often feel "neglected" when their lady has a baby to look after (its true!!!). Remember to find time to kiss and cuddle him too.

If you have a video camera, take loads of film. My babies are in their teens now and I love looking at their baby video's (although they hate them!!). Everyone says enjoy it, but it is very very hard work and not always possible, but do savour every moment possible - time starts to fly by when you have had a baby and they do grow up really fast.

ScaredAndConfused

This sounds really stupid, and maybe a bit selfish, but it can REALLY knock the dad for six after a day or so, that this baby is in the world, and is your complete responsibility - I know it did for me.

My wife had to stay in hospital for the first few days with our son when he was born, and I'd visit all day, for those few days, and you're surrounded by staff at the hospital who can reassure you, show you what to do, that kind of thing.

When they came home my wife went for a bath one evening and left me with the little fella, now, I'm an only child myself, and have no cousins either, and zero experience of babies. He started to cry, and I just didn't know what to do - it sounds so silly now, but I broke down in tears myself thinking 'I don't know what to do, he needs something, and I don't know what is it'

The wife came downstairs, and calmed him (and me!) down, and reassured me I was doing a good job etc. etc., so my tip would be, take time out to be there for each other, and reassure each other - it's new to you both and you're not supposed to 'know' what to do, you just learn as you go along really!

Anneliese13

If you want your baby to have a soother, try a bit of reverse psychology when offering it and pull it away slightly. They'll quickly get to grips with holding onto it and it'll avoid endless trips to the crib to replace the bl**dy thing when they've let it fall out.

Room temperature milk is a good one. I kept a sterilised bottle and carton of ready made formula by the bed when my DD was at that stage. Not very "money saving" I know, but it certainly helped me function at work the next day!

Small laundry baskets kept safely near the top and bottom stairs can be handy for transporting several things up and down while baby is in your other hand.

I can't say I've tried this one, but I've been told that if your terrible two-er is intent on clambering out of a supermarket trolley, tying their shoelaces together works a treat :-)

Good thread, btw. I'm expecting my second any day after a seven year gap and I've forgotten so much !

honeypop

Al_Mac wrote: »

My tip is not to feel guilty, too much, when the thought passes, fleetingly, through you mind, that you want to kill the horrible little !!!!!!.

Thanks for that one! :rotfl:

ScaredAndConfused wrote:

I broke down in tears myself thinking 'I don't know what to do, he needs something, and I don't know what is it'

This gave me tears in my eyes, I can see my OH doing exactly the same thing and will be sure to remember to help him out.

Thanks guys these are exactly the kinds of things I am after...keep them coming!:T

anonymousie

My tip.....Go with the flow and do what feels right and stops the crying (short of out and out daft/dangerous!). Breast feed all the time if that's what it takes, and bottle feed to demand if you choose to without thinking "they can't possibly be hungry"....co sleep if you need/want to (within safety guidelines) etc etc. With a tiny baby you are not "making a rod for your back" if you give them what they need and hold them all the time etc.

poe.tuesday

Massage the baby, they love it, it doesn't matter if you don't know what you are doing.

Let the baby have a bath with dad, alone, it really builds up a bond and gives them time together

burp, burp and burp that baby, start with little rubs and pats at the lower back and work your way up, get those burps out, you can also lay the baby tummy down on your knees and rub their backs to help with wind

when they are slightly older (now this is going to turn some stomaches), you know when they want to pooh, undo their nappy but leave them on it whist they are on their backs, lift up their legs so their knees are up towards their chest, do this a couple of times whilst giving the odd rub to their tummies, you will find that this will help them poo, it's so much easier for them to do this with the nappy off, as they get older you will be able to hold them over the nappy in a sort of squatting possition so they are up-right with their knees bent, in the same position as us girls are when we pee outside (not that I would do such a thing), the baby will be able to poo really easily then - some of you may say, just leave them alone but you think about trying to poo whilst lying down - going against gravity a bit there ;-)

some one said about letting the baby drink room temp milk, the only issue with this is if you leave milk out it is a breeding ground for germs, when they are older yes, but just be careful

In teh ear thermometers, best investment you will make as you will constantly be taking your babies temp as it's just seems to be what first mums do (me included)

muslins squares - absolute must for putting over the shoulder, putting round baby etc, they wash and dry really easliy

heather38

poe.tuesday wrote: »

some one said about letting the baby drink room temp milk, the only issue with this is if you leave milk out it is a breeding ground for germs, when they are older yes, but just be careful

sorry forgot to say, what i do is sterilise all the bottles in the morning and boil the kettle at the same time. i then pour the required amount of water in the bottle and screw on the lid. when it's time for feeding i just add the powder and away i go. i don't leave the milk in the bottle all day as it's not recommended anymore.

nej

Don't put the baby to sleep in a deathly quiet room and then tip-toe around the house, as otherwise he'll jump at the slightest noise later on. We were able to put him to sleep in the lounge and watch the TV, do the vacuuming etc without him waking.

Those little clips that attach to dummys and clothing to stop them getting lost are great.

Buy some clothes a size up from what they are now. You really won't believe how fast they outgrow things.

Further down the line - buy shoes from Ebay. I've just decided to start doing this after the last pair of £25 Clarkes shoes have now been outgrown within 2 months or so.