We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.
This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
leaving children on their own?
Comments
-
Yes, it's a low risk, I'm not saying otherwise! But higher than risks associated with being home alone.And that's over a year, yes? Where the child does about 500 trips in total between school and home (or vice versa), very roughly, if they walk to school every day? So the statistical risk per trip is...err, one in (500 x 10,000)? One fatality/serious injury per half a million walk to or from school trips?0 -
Yes, it's a low risk, I'm not saying otherwise! But higher than risks associated with being home alone.
How do you know? If a child has an accident home alone, is every parent likely to admit to it? And are there any stats to show the ones that do occur in those circumstances?
RTA stats are readily available.0 -
Nice tack, but my eldest son has a pastoral role for year 7 in his job so I think I can be relatively confident that his well being was in safe hands.
I also have extensive MH training/qualifications, so again, I doubt there are any issues there.
I doubt anyone who wasn't trying to point score ;)would equate leaving an almost 16 year old at home for 3 days in the care of his three adult brothers one of whom has specific training in the area of children with leaving a nine year old home alone.
So, you wouldn't go away on a short break leaving an almost 16 year old in the care of three adult siblings? Yet in 3 months he could get married, join the army etc,etc, and yet you purport to advocate empowerment and giving children responsibility?:rotfl:
Interesting too, that you view the care of a child (well, in our a case a teenager 2 months off being 16) by any other adult rather than a parent as inferior.
My my, we are defensive. I don't think I said any other adult, I said siblings weren't the same as parents and why should they be. I have pointed out why I think 15 is an age where adolescents face all sorts of difficulties and parental support is important, more serious than leaving a nine year old for half an hour. I think it goes without saying that I wouldn't leave a nine year old for three days or even three hours. Apart from anything else I actually liked going on holiday with my children, from birth to them going to university I never went on holiday and left them at home, I did have breaks without them but as I said before I did it when they were on trips with school, friends or clubs. As to your son being a teacher, sorry but so what. One of the teenagers I know who attempted suicide, fortunately unsuccessful, had a parent who was a teacher who had missed all the signs.
I don't know why you can't accept people having another view, I have repeatedly acknowledged that your life experiences have given you one view and mine gives me another. Isn't that how it normally works?
By the way I don't think you mentioned three days so could have been a fortnight in Spain for all I know.
I don't know what your qualifications or the area you work in but I am sure you do realise that teenagers are hard to read and sometimes do something rash, if they are lucky they live to regret it.
Working in mental health and having qualifications does not mean we can read our children perfectly, just like policemen having kids who go off the rails or even the cobbler's children not having shoes. I remember being told by a nursery teacher that they always dreaded having doctor's children in nursery as they dropped them off even if they were really ill and were always the parents who refused to accept it when they got a call to ask them to pick them up.
It is about risk, I think we all agree about that, I have never known a nine year old come to any harm being left alone for half an hour in their own home. I have experienced being groped as a teenager in a crowded cinema, I have known 12 year olds being knocked down by cars and teenagers committing suicide when they were unhappy and were left alone over night by parents who were elsewhere. Therefore I never worried about my nine year olds being alone for half an hour, that isn't to say I didn't worry about them. I worried about my teenagers too and encouraged them to go out and try things and experience life. Leaving them at home while I went on holiday wasn't something I ever felt the need to do.
By the way I am not interested in point scoring, I left school a long, long time ago.Sell £1500
2831.00/£15000 -
Not with the poet-bot. I think it's a Turing test.My my, we are defensive. I don't think I said any other adult, I said siblings weren't the same as parents and why should they be. I have pointed out why I think 15 is an age where adolescents face all sorts of difficulties and parental support is important, more serious than leaving a nine year old for half an hour. I think it goes without saying that I wouldn't leave a nine year old for three days or even three hours. Apart from anything else I actually liked going on holiday with my children, from birth to them going to university I never went on holiday and left them at home, I did have breaks without them but as I said before I did it when they were on trips with school, friends or clubs. As to your son being a teacher, sorry but so what. One of the teenagers I know who attempted suicide, fortunately unsuccessful, had a parent who was a teacher who had missed all the signs.
I don't know why you can't accept people having another view, I have repeatedly acknowledged that your life experiences have given you one view and mine gives me another. Isn't that how it normally works?0 -
My my, we are defensive. I don't think I said any other adult, I said siblings weren't the same as parents and why should they be.
Not at all defensive, more incredulous that you would try to postulate such an argument to bolster your view.I have pointed out why I think 15 is an age where adolescents face all sorts of difficulties and parental support is important, more serious than leaving a nine year old for half an hour. I think it goes without saying that I wouldn't leave a nine year old for three days or even three hours.
Support is important for adolescents, surely as a professional you acknowledge that support can come from other than parents? In our case because there is such a big age gap between the yougest and the eldest he does see himself in Loco Parentis, and is happy and able to take on that role if we go away for a short period.
Nor do I know if, or for how long you would consider leaving a nine year old is acceptable, how long does it take to foster independence?;)Apart from anything else I actually liked going on holiday with my children, from birth to them going to university I never went on holiday and left them at home
Ditto, and in fact this year we will still holiday as an extended family by their choice. It doesn't win us parent of the year award though!!I did have breaks without them but as I said before I did it when they were on trips with school, friends or clubs. As to your son being a teacher, sorry but so what. One of the teenagers I know who attempted suicide, fortunately unsuccessful, had a parent who was a teacher who had missed all the signs.
I don't know why you can't accept people having another view, I have repeatedly acknowledged that your life experiences have given you one view and mine gives me another. Isn't that how it normally works?
I have repeatedly said each to their own, I do accept you have another view but when you try to support that view by bringing in such a straw-man is really when it is time to accept that you have hit rock bottom.By the way I don't think you mentioned three days so could have been a fortnight in Spain for all I know.
Indeed it could, and would that have been so awful, if my youngest was left with a 28 year old teacher as his guardian?I don't know what your qualifications or the area you work in but I am sure you do realise that teenagers are hard to read and sometimes do something rash, if they are lucky they live to regret it.
No, you have no idea what my qualifications are but I lecture in a college and have pastoral responsibility for SPLD issues including MH issues and I have quals in all the appropriate areas. I have no idea what your quals are but the equation you seek to make really doesn't compute.Working in mental health and having qualifications does not mean we can read our children perfectly, just like policemen having kids who go off the rails or even the cobbler's children not having shoes. I remember being told by a nursery teacher that they always dreaded having doctor's children in nursery as they dropped them off even if they were really ill and were always the parents who refused to accept it when they got a call to ask them to pick them up.
I didn't think it did, you alluded to working in the field of MH and the issues that could throw upIt is about risk, I think we all agree about that, I have never known a nine year old come to any harm being left alone for half an hour in their own home. I have experienced being groped as a teenager in a crowded cinema, I have known 12 year olds being knocked down by cars and teenagers committing suicide when they were unhappy and were left alone over night by parents who were elsewhere. Therefore I never worried about my nine year olds being alone for half an hour, that isn't to say I didn't worry about them. I worried about my teenagers too and encouraged them to go out and try things and experience life. Leaving them at home while I went on holiday wasn't something I ever felt the need to do.
There are those who have posted that they know children who have come to harm home alone, and it really does only take one incident as the infamous McCann's now know.By the way I am not interested in point scoring, I left school a long, long time ago.
I will leave it to others to judge the validity of that last statement.;)0 -
-
Yes, it's a low risk, I'm not saying otherwise! But higher than risks associated with being home alone.
No, no, I wasn't argueing with you. Still, a one in half million chance is pretty low, isn't it? I wonder what the serious injury/mortality stats are for same age children that are driven to school instead?Val.0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply
Categories
- All Categories
- 352K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.5K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 454.2K Spending & Discounts
- 245K Work, Benefits & Business
- 600.6K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177.4K Life & Family
- 258.8K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.2K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards