Children Catching the Bus

Mojisola

Goldiegirl wrote: »

However, I was very suprised to learn that it is the norm for women to be touched inappropriately on public transport.

I didn't say it was the norm - that it happens to every woman all the time - but that most women who regularly use public transport, especially at busy, commuting times, have experienced it.

Dunroamin

tyllwyd wrote: »

You are allowing a 16 year old girl to travel to Nice by train by herself? (or with friends a similar age?) That's quite a difference from a bus ride to the next town! My biggest practical worry would be what would happen if things went wrong - her money got stolen or she lost her passport. She's still officially a minor, so would she have trouble sorting things out, even if she is a very capable person?

She could be married or in the army at the age of 16, travelling alone to Nice would be a doddle compared to either of these!

nfollows1982

Dunroamin wrote: »

50 yards - why would she even need to come and meet him at all?

She might not feel the need, but I'd rather put the proposal to her showing I've thought about him the other end and then it can be her decision whether she meets him or not.

Dunroamin

Mojisola wrote: »

I didn't say it was the norm - that it happens to every woman all the time - but that most women who regularly use public transport, especially at busy, commuting times, have experienced it.

That may be true of the London Underground but I don't think it's true on most bus services.

Mojisola

Dunroamin wrote: »

That may be true of the London Underground but I don't think it's true on most bus services.

I didn't say "buses" - I said "public transport".

I think crowded trains do seem to give some men the idea that groping is alright but it's not the only place it happens.

It's like all the other rare events in life - don't panic about it but it's easier to deal with if you're prepared.

jellyhead

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

I would want to do the journey with them the first couple of times.
Maybe:
1st time go together, with the grown up taking the lead and pointing out relevant things to the child.
2nd time go together, with the child taking the lead, telling the grown up when to get off, etc.
3rd time with the grown up on the same bus but not sitting together - just be there in the background if needed.
4th time they can go on their own.

If they struggle with any of the steps then you can go back a step or stay on that step until ready to progress.

Obviously, as has been said above, it depends on the child.

I'd do it that way too, but mine is an unobservant child who follows other people, with his head in the clouds.

If it's a journey the child's been on before they probably wouldn't need so many steps, but would need to know bus terminology for which ticket type they wanted and roughly how long before they need to be looking out for the landmarks that signal when to press the button. Also, they'd need to have a charged mobile, and some clue about what to do if they don't get off at the correct stop.

My son is older, but the journey to visit his girlfriend scared him until I'd gone with him a couple of times and showed him very clearly which landmarks meant it would soon be time to press the button. It's small villages and forest, and if he didn't press the button in time he'd have to wait a couple of miles for the next stop, and have enough money to buy an extra ticket.

As mum of an 11 year old I thought lots of things sounded too scary for my little boy to manage on his own, but by the time he was a term into secondary school I relaxed about most things Children are so different too - my eldest had to be coerced into walking to school without me in year 6, whereas my 7 year old would go on his own now if I let him and is always asking if he can go to places on his own.

delain

Mojisola wrote: »

I didn't say it was the norm - that it happens to every woman all the time - but that most women who regularly use public transport, especially at busy, commuting times, have experienced it.

I must be frighteningly unattractive then, because I catch several buses a day (have done for years) and have never been accosted on one, not even once :rotfl: :rotfl:

nfollows1982

Well he's live down the same street for the last 4 years so I'm pretty confident that he'd know where to get off and as it's only a single journey as long as he knows to ask for that there's no reason to confuse what to ask for.

There is the option that I buy him a 10 journey ticket in advance for £6 which lasts for 30 days. Even if it only gets used once or twice within that period I'd have piece of mind that he's (a) got the ticket for journey and (b) if something did happen and he got ooff at the wrong stop he'd be able to jump on a bus going back the other way.

Claree__x

delain wrote: »

I must be frighteningly unattractive then, because I catch several buses a day (have done for years) and have never been accosted on one, not even once :rotfl: :rotfl:

I know! I'm starting to feel like it's personal :rotfl:

Hermia

tyllwyd wrote: »

You are allowing a 16 year old girl to travel to Nice by train by herself? (or with friends a similar age?) That's quite a difference from a bus ride to the next town! My biggest practical worry would be what would happen if things went wrong - her money got stolen or she lost her passport. She's still officially a minor, so would she have trouble sorting things out, even if she is a very capable person?

The thing is that girl could be going off on a gap year around the world in two years time so a trip to Europe should be doable for a sensible 16 year old.

I was a teenager in the early 1990s and am so glad of that because parents didn't seem to fret so much then. I regularly travelled to London from my early teens and went on public transport on my own from the age of 11. My friends were all the same. The thing is I don't remember any of my friends or classmates being too immature to manage these things. Yet I regularly hear parents now saying their teenage children are too immature to cope with going anywhere on their own.