Why can't I just be left alone!?

JCD_Capulet

Dunroamin wrote: »

I can understand most of the OP's problems except for complaining about her husband serving dinner at 7 o'clock. That just doesn't seem to make sense.

When you have a lot on your shoulders irritations come in different shapes and sizes.

coinxoperated

The dinner thing wasn't dinner at dinner time. It was lunch for about 2pm as we were going out at 5ish.

caeler

coinxoperated wrote: »

The dinner thing wasn't dinner at dinner time. It was lunch for about 2pm as we were going out at 5ish.

So did you manage to get something to eat?

Person_one

Your post is a bit long and ranty (obviously, being a rant!) so I tried to condense it a bit. From what I can see your problems are:


Your closest friend lives too near and is too keen to spend time with you.

Your OH is happy to spend all his spare time at home with you

Your family want to see more of you, but you don't like most of them.

The one sister you do like seem to be in an abusive relationship and wants to see you when she can but you don't want to because of her availability.

Your OH is making dinner, it'll be ready at 7.



I can see two actual problems in there. If your uncle, nan and spiteful sister add nothing positive to your life then just be done and stop seeing them. I never see one of my grandmothers because she's a nasty piece of work, she doesn't care and neither do I! They'll probably moan about you to all and sundry, but who cares?

Your other sister, it must be hard to see her in that situation, but if you care about her then this is when she needs you the most. Stick around, see her when you can and be ready to spring into action when she feels able to leave him. You can't make that happen though it has to come from her.

On the others, just lighten up a bit.

Person_one

coinxoperated wrote: »

The dinner thing wasn't dinner at dinner time. It was lunch for about 2pm as we were going out at 5ish.

Well, there was no way it was ever going to be ready at 2 if he hadn't even started at 1. Why didn't you just stop him when he announced it?

bright_side

coinxoperated wrote: »

This weekend, as we all know, is mothers day. I have no children and my mum passed away when I was 15. Each mothers day I feel cranky, sad, emotional and tend to just want to be on my own. I just want and need my own space.

This is the part of your post that stands out to me, bless you xx
It's perfectly natural to feel this way on/around days like today and my bet is that everything else is irritating you all the more because of it. Well done for ranting on here and not in 'real life'!! Sending you a great big squeezy hug xx

happyhaddock_2

I agree.....





















You should tell them all to f off:D

thorsoak

I cannot find the post quoted above in post 57 - had I read this earlier in your first post, my response would have been more sympathetic.

Mother's Day isn't easy for a lot of us - I spent it alone - my mother died many years ago, and my OH died 2 years ago. My 4 children are all grown up, and yes, I got the cards, the flowers and the phone calls - but it wasn't possible for any of them to visit - two live abroad and the others live and work far enough away not to be able to call in for a couple of hours.

It's hard to adapt to being on one's own and the quietness when one has been used to a large, noisy family around, so perhaps I was harsh.

belfastgirl23

I know what you mean about needing quiet time. And it seems to me that things are getting to you because you feel you can't get peace.

I think you need some strategies to cope. I have a Saturday morning date with myself to potter, review the week etc. mostly I take myself out for coffee . I also have a Sunday morning meditation class which gives me a switch off. Could you try to build some time like this into your own life? It really helps!

bright_side

It was in the first post

coinxoperated wrote: »

Just a much needed rant!

I work full time, some weeks 6 out of 7 days. OH works 5 days one week and 6 the next.

This weekend, we had made some plans to go out for a few drinks with friends last night, but OH was called into work in the morning so we decided to leave it until next weekend. Were short on cash at the moment too, so every little saving helps.

My closest friend and her partner (who I struggle to bond with, hes very childish and seems to think I should be fascinated by his recent large fresh meat purchase for loads of money should impress me. Alongside this, he's just extremely childish) have moved 0.5 mile away from my flat and are bugging me daily to either go round for dinner, visit, or they will come to me. It almost feels like a threat at times!

Alongside this, my OH does nothing other than work and spend time with me. I have asked him to go out with friends or do something he wants to, but he seems pretty happy just being at home. He's dads much like that too, so its not unexpected. I'm more than happy to just stay in and relax, its a rareity to not HAVE to do something.

I love my best friend to bits, but I'm not really a 'people' person and struggle spending longer than say, 3 hours with the same people. My OH is probably the only person I have ever managed to be with for such long periods of time without wanting to kill them. (Although.. right now I could).

This weekend, as we all know, is mothers day. I have no children and my mum passed away when I was 15. Each mothers day I feel cranky, sad, emotional and tend to just want to be on my own. I just want and need my own space.

My best friend has, even after explaining this to her, continued to ask me to either visit her or her visit me about 9 times since Friday night. We talk alot via text throughout the week and nothing big has happened that she needs me for or anything, she just seems to have a fixation on that we live closer now so we should see each other all the time.

She has been there for me and I for her and I don't want to end the friendship or anything that extreme, I just need my space.

Alongside all of this, my uncle who cares for my nan who is 100 also phones me three times a week wanting me to commit to a time I can visit. If the visit is less than 4 hours I get tutting, sighing and then hearing about how rubbish he thinks I am after telling my sister. My sister is very spiteful and relays this all back to me. I know he does it, I've heard him!

I visit them monthly at the moment. It's a long story, but my nan isn't a 100 year old lovely granny. She is a manipulative woman who will stir and b!tch at every opportunity. I can never discuss anything in my life with them, as without a doubt everybody will know about it. They twist words and make up things to entertain themselves.

I'm pretty seperated from everyone in my family, as they all seem to just do things to ''look good'. They aren't a caring family, nor do they help anyone in times of need. They just turn up when there face should be in the family photo so to speak

And then I have OH. Who informed me very proudly at 1pm that he would be making us a roast dinner as a treat as we had a pork joint in the freezer.

That was 3 hours and 51 minutes ago... and he's just putting it into the oven. As much as I appriciate his efforts, I feel like throwing it at his head and going and getting a McDonalds. We won't be eating until nearer 7pm, as he spends forever to do basic kitchen tasks, and with the risk of sounded very ungrateful, his food isn't exactly scrumptious.

Whilst messing around between 1pm and 4:53pm, he's managed to forget he left a pan on with oil in, which has smoked out our flat and made my eyes sting and water. He's tried to do something fancy with the pork, which would have been great.. until he then put the pork joint onto a tray which all the juices are running off while it 'slow cooks' in our oven. It's a disaster which I will have to smile through because he's 'doing us a favour'.


And then we have my younger sister, who dictates when she will be visiting and how many hours she would like to have of everyones time. She sent me a list of dates to book as annual leave from work, as she 'might' be able to visit.

Now, if she was a busy mum, business woman etc etc I would totally appriciate the efforts to visit. But she's in a low paid 9 - 5 monday to friday job which is funding her OH's drug habit and constant drinking. She'll visit and moan her head off about her OH and then expects us to be polite and sit with him. If were not particularly chatty with him, I get some sort of 'he's who I have chosen, accept him' text. Quite frankly, it saddens me that this scumbag has brain washed my sister. But she won't listen and he won't change.

I am just getting fed up with people. I hand on heart want to just tell them all to f off and leave me alone.

Phew... well that feels better. Ironically, I wouldn't mind reading any replies :rotfl: Internet people are great, you can just close the screen when it gets boring / annoying / you find something better to do! :T