Kinship care

keep_the_faith

Please be kind to me this is my first post .Have been lurking for a considerable amount of time though lol . I am just wondering if there is anyone else out there with a similar situation to us ? . To cut a very long story short dgs has been living with us since july last year following intrvention from social services as daughter (21 ) was involved with drugs drink the wrong crowd anyway all came to a head and dgs was placed with us . so far there have been 2 lac reviews the next one in 3 weeks . during the last 8 months daughter has done nothing to change lifestyle . Her contact with dgs has recently been changed from 3 days 2hours at a time supervised to 2 days . im just wondering what to expect at the next lac review and how long would this current situation be allowed to continue for ?

Alikay

I think you'd be better speaking to your DGS's social worker about this as a lot will depend on particular circumstances and the quality of contact: For example, does your DD interact well with her child at the sessions, is she consistent with turning up or does she forget/turn up late. If DGS is upset before/during/after contact and of course, the biggie...is there a probability that he'll return to her care at some point?

Contact is meant to be for the child's benefit, not the adults' and there should be a point to it, but often that seems to get overlooked by SWs and legal bods! It's up to you to act as your DGS's advocate and make sure they know the effects of contact on him.

thorsoak

Look at the threads Mooloo has on this board - your circumstances are not dissimilar - and there are another couple of people who've helped Mooloo whose names escape me - but you'll find them there - or Mooloo can give you some moral support x

skylight

I too am a Kniship Carer! Hello! :wave:

I have had my DGS for almost a year now and things are still not settled despite this being an "easy" case. I do have the final court date for June when things should be rubber stamped and the SGO (Special Guardianship Order) should be applied.

What sort of stage are you at? Have SS mentioned SGOs or RO (Residency Orders) for you and your DGS so he lives with you more permanently?

Are you also receiving kinship/fostering allowance payments instead of child benefit and child tax credits?

The current situation will run for as long as you or SS allow it. If you want your DGS for the long term then you need to get the ball rolling with SS and get a solicitor to apply for a SGO. If you don't want him long term then you need to speak to your social worker. An SGO takes months too whilst waiting for court and SS to compile reports etc.

My DD has just had her contact suspended because she just doesn't bother turning up. She too hasn't changed her lifestyle but not through drink or drugs etc. Its just because she is too damn lazy to look after herself let alone her son. This is not the girl I bought up.

keep_the_faith

Thanks for replies , Alikay i have spoken with sw but dont seem to get any real clarification re time scales . The meeting that is to take place at the end of this month should have been at start of january but was cancelled as sw was off sick ! So hopefully will have abetter picture then .Interaction between daughter and DGS has been monitored since last meeting in October . Contacts have not been good with her having missed 19 out of around 40 !!!!!!DGS goes happily to these contacts always looking reassurance as to time of collection .but never any tears going or leaving . Is that a good thing ?? SKYLIGHT HI at last someone in a similar position . I feel very isolated at times and have sooooo many questions !Can you tell me what is the difference between a SGO and a residency order ? Yes we do receive a fostering allowance . pay for nappies clothes treats out of this and250 a month goes on nursery fees that DGS attends 2 days a week . Can i ask do you have any sort of relationship with your daughter . I dont !!! At first i had said i would be willing to talk to her when she sorted herself out well 8 months on and it has gone from bad to worse .and i really dont want ANYTHING to do with her ,I dont know if i can ever forgive her !Also did you ever have any doubts as to weather or not you would want to keep your DGS permernantly .??

Ms_Chocaholic

SGO is Special Guardianship Order, see notes here
http://www.education.gov.uk/childrenandyoungpeople/families/special

RO is Residence Order, see info here
http://www.alternativefamilylaw.co.uk/en/children/residence-orders.htm


How old is your DGS. I imagine Social Services will make all attempts to reunite DGS with his mother but if that fails they will have to look at the bigger picture, whether that is he stays with you, adopted elsewhere if you feel unable to care for him in the long-term.

The Court make the final decisions regarding what will happen to DGS so they need to allow sufficient time for his mum to make every effort to rebuild her relationship with DGS otherwise SSD will be slated in Court, that is maybe why there is a delay and things aren't moving very fast for you.

Do you have a Social Worker/Support Worker for yourselves? Foster carers in our area have Social Workers assigned for them to deal with any issues that may arise. If not, it may be worth speaking to the fostering team.