Stammering

misswig

Hi

Any advise gratefully recieved

My DS(21/2) has recently started to stammer. It started out gradually over 2 months ago when he occasionally stammered over M or W. It has gradually got worse so that some days i can hardly understand him at all

He has a fantastic vocablary and his speech is above average for his age, howver i have become a bit concerned as he only seems to be doing it when he is at home. Nursery have said that he occasionally stammers but nothing out of the ordinary and his grandparents had him on Sunday for the day and remarked that he hadn't stammered once whilst being out, however on getting into the house he started again.

I have had him reviewed by his HV with a view to referral to a speech therapist however she assures me that his developement is normal if not above average and that it is quite common at this age, particulay with boys, to develope astammer which they grow out of. He will be reviewed at 3 1/2 if he still has it

I ignore thee stammering, keep eye contact with him when having a conversation with him, praise him for his speech when he doesn't stammer etc but i find it really frustrating and it breaks my heart to see his little face screw up to try and get something out. He said to me the other day 'i cant do it mummy' and i could have cried buckets

I feel really guilty and feel that it is something i am doing wrong or that he has no confidence around me. Has any body got any advise or had a similar experiance with their kids??
Thanks

Vxx

silvercar

The only advice I can give (coming from a family of stammerers) is to let him finish his sentences, resist the temptation to butt in or to finish his sentences for him. Try not to second guess the remainder of the sentence and answer the question you think he is asking. Anything that makes him feel pressurised will make the stammering worse.

The other thing that may be useful to know is that you can't stammer and sing at the same time. So to build confidence, encourage him to sing songs!

misswig

silvercar wrote: »

The only advice I can give (coming from a family of stammerers) is to let him finish his sentences, resist the temptation to butt in or to finish his sentences for him. Try not to second guess the remainder of the sentence and answer the question you think he is asking. Anything that makes him feel pressurised will make the stammering worse.

The other thing that may be useful to know is that you can't stammer and sing at the same time. So to build confidence, encourage him to sing songs!

Thanks silvercar. I will certainly try that as he loves singing

vxx

SEK_2

My ds started stuttering just before he was 21/2yrs. He's now 41/2yrs and has stuttered for about 6mths.
All the haertache and tears i went through and he's just fine.

We are lucky here and have a drop in speech therapy clinic. The speech therapist reasured me that it is a common problem in boys and she was almost certain that by the age of 5 he would have grown out of it. It didn't stop my heart breaking everytime he did it though. He used to srew his fist up and push it in is eye when it was really bad and stamp his feet.

She told me that his brain was going to fast for his mouth. He had all these words in his head and was in a rush to get them out.

I will give you a website that she recommened to me that has a good section on under 5's and tips for helping him. Sorry i don't know how to do links but here's the web address.
https://www.stammering.org/pre-school.html

I would persevere in getting referred to a speech thearapist though. My Ds had 3mth reviews and was discharged after 18mths. She was great in reasurring me and giving us helpfull tips, advice and exercises. If you dont get referred can you afford to see a private speech therapist?

With my Ds it was worse when he was tired, excited or trying to tell me something before his sister told me.

My ds now talks fluently non-stop and above average for his age.:T

dollydoodah

Totally agree with everything the previous posters have said.

Our son started stammering at about 3 - we were told in basic terms that his brain was ahead of him physically being able to get the words out. It is such a difficult thing to go through and to remember to let them finish the sentence.

His stammer lasted about 8mths and it practically stopped as suddenly as it had started. I was told it was common but as a parent it is distressing to see your child like that.

And mine also never shuts up now - he is 8 and he talks for the sake of it most of the time with no problems.

irishesman

Our eldest daughter :A started stammering at the age of about 4. At first I thought she was just copying my wife, but following at bit of research I discovered that stammering is not learnt or copied. As mentioned above, stammering.org is a wonderful site

After a long fight with our health visitor (she thought we were being nurotic, as DD wouldn't stammer in front of her on three seperate visits, and the moment she left, the poor thing couldn't get a word out!!!)

Finally we were refered to speach therapy, and were put on a course related to the Michael Palin centre.

Basically, both parents had to make 5 minutes time out with the child called 'special time' where we had to play with DD and allow her to lead the play. During this we were taught to slow our rate of speach down, move ourselves to her level and maintain eye contact and to avoid questioning her. The main point is to make that 5 minutes un-interrupted. I was fairly skeptical about how 5 minutes could work like this, but went into it open minded, as the least it would provide is 5 minutes 'quality time' with her.

The best way to describe what to do, is to watch how two young children play, and try ro re-enact that.

However, the results were sectacular. Within 3 months, she hardly ever stammers, except when very tired or when over excited. In addition, the her self belief and confidence has gone through the roof and she is now a normal 6 year old and has a wide circle of friends.

Even now, we still have special time, and it causes great upset if it is forgotten.

Hope that this helps and keep communicating with her. You will get through it and learn a lot about yourself and your children ion the process

PS Also started giving her Omega3 at the same time, but this may be a total co-incidence

misswig

Thank you so much for all your advise. Its reassuring to know that it is in fact a fairly common problem( iwas told that but as i dont know of anybody else with the problem, i thought it was just us!!) I was beginning to feel that it was all my fault:eek: :eek:

Irishesman- i ill get some omega 3 on way back from work and give it a whirl

Vxx

dollop

hi to be honest kids go through stammering stages,two of mine did for a while,i dont know what causes it,but after a while they went naturually i fink it might be a phase or something mines were about 3 and 4 when it happened,i would try not to worry so much and im sure it will work out fine,good luck,dollop xx

andipandi_2

One of my twin girls used to stammer,was told she would grow out of it and she did.

eamon

I hope your child grows out of it, many don't. I haven't and I'm 45. I have many more good days than bad days and that has been the way for many years. I tend to struggle with words that begin with vowels and the letter B. Of course over the years I have developed coping strategies such as word substitution, breathing properly and will usually tend to think very carefully before speaking.
Still to this day making a telephone call can be a nerve racking experience (I love e-mail!!) and I'm sure that has held me back. Oddly enough I don't appear to have a problem when public speaking. There is probably an explanation for that but I can't think of it.

By the way I think you are doing the right things.

yours

Eamon

DUKE

My younger brother developed a stammer too, it was so bad that he used to go red in the face and bend down to get his words out. He did see a speech therapist and he's been fine for many years now.