Concern

whiteroom184

Good afternoon Happy money savers!

i am looking for a bit of advice really,

I live in a 4 bed house with just my 7 year old after separating with my husband last year.

I am keen to rent-a-room, but am concerned for the safety of my son, should i be worried? or am i just over reacting?

cheers

:idea:

aliama

Blimey, you must be rattling around in there.

Honeystly, if it was me, I'd be cautious, and would probably only be willing to take in a female lodger, at least until my child got a bit older.

J_i_m

Could consider downsizing, unless you want to keep the 4 bedrooms incase of finding a new husband and expanding your family.

whiteroom184

Lol

rattling around a bit yes,

finding a new husband and enlarging the family no

downsizing - would love to but the house market is Pooh! lol, only moved 2 1/2 yrs ago so house is the same value, take out fees etc i will end up out of pocket

Should i move my son out lol, then i would have 2 rooms ;-D

G_M

aliama wrote: »

Blimey, you must be rattling around in there.

Honeystly, if it was me, I'd be cautious, and would probably only be willing to take in a female lodger, at least until my child got a bit older.

Seems a bit sexist, no?

But seriously - No one can really advise on how protective you should be, and how to balance that with your financial needs. It's a personal decision.

No one here can 'assess' the risk, and say either "You'll be fine" or "Don't do it."

It hardly needs saying that if you do go ahead, be sensible about deciding who you take in as a lodger, do the obvious checks, and don't leave your son alone in the house with him/her...

RedfordML

I would rent it out and live with family in the short term?

I would not let any strangers live with me and my kids - not comfortable with that situation...gl

whiteroom184

G_M wrote: »

Seems a bit sexist, no?

Maybe...........but your assuming i'm a woman!

aliama

G_M wrote: »

Seems a bit sexist, no?

But seriously - No one can really advise on how protective you should be, and how to balance that with your financial needs. It's a personal decision.

No one here can 'assess' the risk, and say either "You'll be fine" or "Don't do it."

It hardly needs saying that if you do go ahead, be sensible about deciding who you take in as a lodger, do the obvious checks, and don't leave your son alone in the house with him/her...

How is it sexist to be aware that the likelihood of myself or my child being abused or raped is far higher if I were to take a male lodger into my house (rather than a female lodger)? I know it's very unlikely, but actually when you look at the stats, approximately 85,000 women are raped every year in the UK, and 1 in 5 women will experience some sort of sexual violence during their lifetime, so really not all that unlikely, is it?

Please don't trivialise the issue by claiming it's sexist to be aware of this situation and take steps to protect youself and your family.

That said, I agree with the rest of your post.

RedfordML

RedfordML wrote: »

I would rent it out and live with family in the short term?

I would not let any strangers live with me and my kids - not comfortable with that situation...gl

How about a friend, family member or work colleague moves in, then that would be different and offer some £££ support?

chris_m

aliama wrote: »

Honeystly, if it was me, I'd be cautious, and would probably only be willing to take in a female lodger, at least until my child got a bit older.

So child abusers are always men are they?

The risk is pretty much the same irrespective of the lodger's gender.

Tixy

Well hopefully the child would never be left alone with a lodger of either gender.

But if I was considering a lodger my preference would be for a friend or family member first, or someone I knew/had a connection with before choosing a total stranger.
And if I did end up considering a total stranger my preference would also be for a female rather than a male.