How many people on top table?

mysk_girl

I had 13 at my top table, which had a number of guests practically apoplectic. But it worked for the venue and for us, so all was well :-)

daisiegg

apple*pie wrote: »

Daisiegg, are there not any of OH's family there that she knows that she could sit with? If I didn't know anyone else there, I'd probably feel a bit self conscious being centre of attention sitting on the top table...

Nope! OH does have a sister and the original plan was to put OH's daughter with her....but I then realised that as sister is in her late thirties and has a small child, she will be on a table with other similarly aged people and this will be no better for OH's daughter as she'll just be sitting with a load of adults she doesn't know.

Besides, sad as it is, OH's daughter barely knows his family, what little of them there are. She doesn't have a relationship with them.

daisiegg

apple*pie wrote: »

I've also got top table dilemmas!
Mum and Dad are separated, both have their own long term partners.
OH's dad is deceased.
Having one adult bridesmaid, but her husband won't know anyone else at the wedding.
I'm not even bothered about top table, but OH thinks it should be the traditional parents, best man (his brother) and bridesmaid, but I don't want my bridesmaid's husband feeling uncomfortable, and mum & dad's partners having to sit separately (although there are plenty of family for them to sit with...)
Any thoughts?!?

I have a friend with a similar issue - her parents are long, long divorced and her dad has been with his new partner now even longer than he was with her mum, but her mum still can't stand to be in the same room as dad and new partner (she told my friend that if her dad went to her graduation she, her mum, wouldn't go ) Anyway, friend is not even engaged yet but is planning when she does get married to have each set of parents 'hosting' their own tables (and to make it clear on the table plan and make a big deal of it) and to have her and OH and bridesmaids and groomsmen only on the top table. Would that be an option? Could also mean that bridesmaid's husband could be in the top table too where he knows people.

Or some people have a 'sweetheart table' instead of a traditional top table, which is just the bride and groom.

In your case whatever I did I think I would put bridesmaid's husband on the top table with her. Particularly as your OH's dad is sadly deceased, an extra man won't mess up the balance either.

Is it worth asking your parents how they feel and what they expect? It might be that parents' new partners have no expectation of being on top table and are quite happy to sit with family...

Good luck!

caz2003uk

We can only have 6 on our top table! It's a round top table as its how it works at our venue so will be me oh his mum and dad my mum and her partner

split_second

We have been puzzling over this too. Oh's mother is deceased and we have been trying to work fairest way to set the table up. All the wedding plans suggested online on sites assume 2 parents on each side- luckily our venue is v flexible and lets us do what we want within reason