DMP & Mutual Support Thread - Part 9

Everoptimistic31

Hi everyone.

I'm new to this forum and as I write this message I admit I feel scared and more than a little bit hopeless.

After years of getting myself into hotter and hotter water - and point blank refusal to accept it - today I realised that if I'm to ever get my life back on track I need to tackle my debt.

I have £61,000 of it, all on credit cards. Just writing the figure down makes me feel physically ill.

I've requested a DMP pack from Step Change but I'm already living in fear of the threatening letters my creditors might write to me or the telephone calls they might make once I'm signed up to it. Every time I realise that in giving all my surplus to Step Change each month I'll have to cut back on little things like birthday presents for the family or the occasional bunch of flowers for my partner I want to cry. Knowing I'll not be able to go on holiday for over 6 years and the realisation that my credit rating won't recover for over a decade so I'll never be able to buy a house feels right now like a hurdle I don't know I will ever be able to jump over...it all just seems so futile.

And worst of all, I have no one to blame but myself.

I'm sorry for the depressing message, I guess that writing it down is a form of therapy at the start of what will be a long and difficult journey. And of course I've read through this thread and seen what fantastic support you all offer each other. Knowing there is a community out there that understands the overwhelming emotions attached to a debt problem makes me feel like there is just a small light there that hopefully will shine on me now and again.

Thanks for listening

Murphy2011

Hi EO31, welcome! Your message isn't depressing, we've all been there and you are on the way up now, I promise. Hubby and I had over £70k of debt and we went below £57k on the last months DMP statement, we're thrilled to see it dropping every month tbh. Our debt free journey will hopefully end in 2020 and it will be the end of a long but worthwhile journey. Your creditors will probably be understanding, I know ours were and you will be paying it off albeit over a longer period. Your budget can be set up to include having a life, honestly! We are having a cheap week in Greece this summer self catering and we budget for small treats to make life more than just bearable. It is probably the best thing you will do and you will be fine...keep posting, there are lots of lovely people on these forums! Good luck and you will be fine!!

Growurown

Everoptimistic31 wrote: »

I've requested a DMP pack from Step Change but I'm already living in fear of the threatening letters my creditors might write to me or the telephone calls they might make once I'm signed up to it. Every time I realise that in giving all my surplus to Step Change each month I'll have to cut back on little things like birthday presents for the family or the occasional bunch of flowers for my partner I want to cry. Knowing I'll not be able to go on holiday for over 6 years and the realisation that my credit rating won't recover for over a decade so I'll never be able to buy a house feels right now like a hurdle I don't know I will ever be able to jump over...it all just seems so futile.

Hi EO31 :wave: I worried about the letters and phone calls too but it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, and there are things you can do to stop creditors from hassling you.

As to those little treats, well there is something you can do about that as well. When you complete your expenditure for Step Change there are things you can add in to give yourself a bit more flexibility. You can (if you want) include amounts for everything in the plan even if you don't use them. Claim for everything to the maximum amount you can. We claim for smoking, dry cleaning, lunches at work etc. and we don't use any of these things but the extra money it gives us makes life more bearable.

I know this method means that our debt will take longer to pay off, but cutting things to the bone wasn't an option in our case as I know OH would find that very difficult. Some people pay every spare penny toward their debt to pay it off more quickly and I admire their determination. Basically you choose how you want to play it but I suggest you start off with a more generous budget because you can always increase your payment to SC at a later date if you feel you can afford it.

Growurown

Pickle29 wrote: »

Hi
Just giving you another update ... The saga continues!

We like a good saga. Glad it is getting sorted Pickle.

Sazzie23

Everoptimistic31 wrote: »

Hi everyone.

I'm new to this forum and as I write this message I admit I feel scared and more than a little bit hopeless.

After years of getting myself into hotter and hotter water - and point blank refusal to accept it - today I realised that if I'm to ever get my life back on track I need to tackle my debt.

I have £61,000 of it, all on credit cards. Just writing the figure down makes me feel physically ill.

I've requested a DMP pack from Step Change but I'm already living in fear of the threatening letters my creditors might write to me or the telephone calls they might make once I'm signed up to it. Every time I realise that in giving all my surplus to Step Change each month I'll have to cut back on little things like birthday presents for the family or the occasional bunch of flowers for my partner I want to cry. Knowing I'll not be able to go on holiday for over 6 years and the realisation that my credit rating won't recover for over a decade so I'll never be able to buy a house feels right now like a hurdle I don't know I will ever be able to jump over...it all just seems so futile.

And worst of all, I have no one to blame but myself.

I'm sorry for the depressing message, I guess that writing it down is a form of therapy at the start of what will be a long and difficult journey. And of course I've read through this thread and seen what fantastic support you all offer each other. Knowing there is a community out there that understands the overwhelming emotions attached to a debt problem makes me feel like there is just a small light there that hopefully will shine on me now and again.

Thanks for listening

Hi Everoptimistic


Thanks for sharing, its not easy, especially at the start and if you hang around on the thread, you'll find that your post will have been read by many more folk than actually have the courage to post. You are helping other by coming on here and reminding us how it feels at the start.


I recently got an email from SC talking about changes to baliff laws and I recalled those early days when I had contingency plans to shift stuff out of the house if the baliffs came.


You are not saying you won't pay, just that you cant afford to keep paying at the rates they were charging, I'm guessing as the debts built up your rates increased and chances of getting 0% deals vanished? Take heart, the road to DFD has started now.

Hopelessly_Hopeful

Puzzcat wrote: »

Hi Ruby,


Sorry I don't have an answer for you with regards to the business account, I expect someone else will pop up shortly with the knowledge!
I don't think it would be a good idea to use a cc to pay the catalogue as the cc creditor could then reject your dmp on the basis of recent activity or refuse to freeze interest add charges etc.. But I can see where your coming from!


Puzz

I agree with Puzz


HHx

Hopelessly_Hopeful

Pickle29 wrote: »

Hi
Just giving you another update ... The saga continues!
Got a letter from GE saying taking no further action- we rang to check exactly what this meant, they confirmed not taking legal action as long as we continue with DMP and they are only charging a minimum amount of interest , I asked for this in writing, and today received a statement! The statement said they had charged £44 pm interest , whilst we were paying £32.30 DMP! Yes, we are paying more in interest than our monthly payment so our debt is going up! We rang them and they said interest would be frozen from 1 st April (statements are one month in Arrears), it appears the whole loan was front loaded with interest so that although we had been paying for 4 years, it had mostly been interest! What a fool have we been! We took this loan out through british gas for a new boiler - if we had taken a personal loan it would have been well paid off by now!

Glad they have now frozen interest, but what idiots we have been not to have read small print 4 years ago when we took out the loan! :mad:

Glad we contacted FOS because as least we can begin to make progress on the debt now!

Hi


Most loans have interest front loaded.


Well done on getting sorted


HHx

Hopelessly_Hopeful

Everoptimistic31 wrote: »

Hi everyone.

I'm new to this forum and as I write this message I admit I feel scared and more than a little bit hopeless.

After years of getting myself into hotter and hotter water - and point blank refusal to accept it - today I realised that if I'm to ever get my life back on track I need to tackle my debt.

I have £61,000 of it, all on credit cards. Just writing the figure down makes me feel physically ill.

I've requested a DMP pack from Step Change but I'm already living in fear of the threatening letters my creditors might write to me or the telephone calls they might make once I'm signed up to it. Every time I realise that in giving all my surplus to Step Change each month I'll have to cut back on little things like birthday presents for the family or the occasional bunch of flowers for my partner I want to cry. Knowing I'll not be able to go on holiday for over 6 years and the realisation that my credit rating won't recover for over a decade so I'll never be able to buy a house feels right now like a hurdle I don't know I will ever be able to jump over...it all just seems so futile.

And worst of all, I have no one to blame but myself.

I'm sorry for the depressing message, I guess that writing it down is a form of therapy at the start of what will be a long and difficult journey. And of course I've read through this thread and seen what fantastic support you all offer each other. Knowing there is a community out there that understands the overwhelming emotions attached to a debt problem makes me feel like there is just a small light there that hopefully will shine on me now and again.

Thanks for listening

Warm welcome to you.


I agree with what the others have said. Easier than you think though and the support here is fabulous. Suggest you get a packet of biscuits and read from the start of the threads. I picked up loads that way and found it really reassuring.


HHx

Time_to_face_the_music

rubyinthesky wrote: »

Hi been reading through this thread slowly and you know so much, I thought I'd ask your advice. Not sure whether to phone StepChange back or if you can help put my mind at rest?

I've got most of my debt on credit cards with reputable banks, and have contacted most of them, even though StepChange said I didn't have to. I have just phoned Very catalogue though, who say that they don't deal with this and it will go to NCO Europe but that I'll be charged late payment fees. Have quickly Googled NCO Europe and not sounding great. This is just going to mean that this debt will grow and grow isn't it? I'm thinking of paying it with one of the cards that I've still not advised yet about the debt management plan but feel that this would be underhand. I don't want to spend when I know for sure that I can't afford to pay it, but it's just under £380 that I owe on Very, so seems such a little amount, but don't want this escalating out of all control.

Also still a bit worried about my business bank account with Santander too, as I have a credit card with them. Step Change said that as I get documentation in my business name for statements, they can't touch that, but I'm feeling uneasy and wondering whether to move it, but really don't want to have to do that.

I can't wait for a couple of months down the line when this might settle down.

I know it's a hassle but I am another one in agreement with protecting the business account by moving it to another bank, I really would not trust Santander not to offset.

Don't pay Very on a credit card, it's not worth the risk but I will confess that I completely maxed out all overdraft facilities available to us before we started our DMP and used that cash as a small emergency fund

It does all settle down reasonably quickly and your mention of a couple of months is pretty accurate. We had non-stop hassle for 6 weeks plus the upset of debt increasing in the first month but by week 6, the phone calls and letters had pretty much stopped and at the end of month 3, we saw a small drop in our debt and it's been downhill all the way from there.

Please stick around for all the help, advice and support you need.

TTFTM x

Time_to_face_the_music

Everoptimistic31 wrote: »

Hi everyone.

I'm new to this forum and as I write this message I admit I feel scared and more than a little bit hopeless.

After years of getting myself into hotter and hotter water - and point blank refusal to accept it - today I realised that if I'm to ever get my life back on track I need to tackle my debt.

I have £61,000 of it, all on credit cards. Just writing the figure down makes me feel physically ill.

I've requested a DMP pack from Step Change but I'm already living in fear of the threatening letters my creditors might write to me or the telephone calls they might make once I'm signed up to it. Every time I realise that in giving all my surplus to Step Change each month I'll have to cut back on little things like birthday presents for the family or the occasional bunch of flowers for my partner I want to cry. Knowing I'll not be able to go on holiday for over 6 years and the realisation that my credit rating won't recover for over a decade so I'll never be able to buy a house feels right now like a hurdle I don't know I will ever be able to jump over...it all just seems so futile.

And worst of all, I have no one to blame but myself.

I'm sorry for the depressing message, I guess that writing it down is a form of therapy at the start of what will be a long and difficult journey. And of course I've read through this thread and seen what fantastic support you all offer each other. Knowing there is a community out there that understands the overwhelming emotions attached to a debt problem makes me feel like there is just a small light there that hopefully will shine on me now and again.

Thanks for listening

Hi and welcome Everoptimistic :hello:

We all suffer from burying our heads, or ostrich syndrome as someone here aptly names it. It's easy to look back and think I wish I had done this earlier but the important thing is that you have had your light bulb moment (LBM) and started it now. So congratulate yourself on the start of your debt free journey :T

I too felt physically ill when I realised the size of our debt, I thought we owed around £50K which was bad enough but we actually owed £82,344. I see you have already had some advice from my debt busting twin HH and she is the one who suggested setting myself small targets and celebrating milestones and it really works. Set yourself up a spreadsheet and track your debts, seeing your debt reduce is so motivating!

Everyone here is in the same position as you or has been in the past. We may deal with our debts differently but we all are in a similar boat so understand how you feel. Take advantage of the help, advice. experience and, above all, support here. It truly is invaluable and I would never be in the position I am now if it were not for this thread and the ones previous to it.

TTFTM x