Help! I'm really worried.

tufty22

I came on here to ask this because I've never had to claim for anything before so I thought asking here would be a good idea. Thankyou to those who understood that that's what a was doing.

Calling me "laughable" and saying that I'm complaining, isn't.

And Kevin, as you have no idea of the rubbish and the hell she's put us through, you've no idea how strong I am. My intentions was always to go back to work, I just think that cost wise, part time for the mean time might work out better. If not, then I'll be full time. I haven't decided yet. One of the reasons that I'd thought coming on here might have been a good idea.

I'm not saying that I resent us paying, I'm asking that as we're 200 a month down already, where do I go or how do I work out what's best to do for US.

kevin137

I have a very good idea of what you have been put through...!

I have been through it all myself...!

Including living in a different country while working in the UK and having NO children taken into consideration, them taken twice what they should of been taking, leaving me with no money at all for bills or food...

So yes i have an idea, all i was saying, that the normal consensus would be that children cost money, and if you cannot afford them teh you should not have them...

The figure given for what it costs to bring a child up in the UK is now £192 a week...!!! So there you have it... Your partner pays £200 a a month... And you are thinking of having another child while struggling for money...

It just makes me wonder if people really do think through the real costs involved...!

Bluemeanie_2

Hello,

I know some of the other posts may sound a little harsh, but if you can see past this there is some good advice there.
See the £200 as an essential payment along with your council tax etc. I wouldn't focus on this on the reason why your skint. Trust me it will drive you crazy and send you mad. Your questions seems more aimed at the frustration of balancing modern life with a baby and childcare - That I can sympathise with. I'm 8 weeks pregnant, not entitled to any state help, but it's a fine balance about whether it's worth me working or not. Long term it is for me personally, I would probably be condemning myself to a life on minimum wage if I gave up work for 4/5 years. It seems your frustrations with this is making you focus on something that you see as the problem. I can, see it from your point of view, whether or not I agree, having to, in one or another paying/subsiding the household to pay for kids you don't get to see and being in this financial situation isn't very hard to swallow.
However, as I say please try to get past this - you won't do yourself any favours stressing/getting angry about it.

Are there any other ways you can make/earn money while bringing up your child? Childminding? Buying and selling etc. On other parts of the forum there are loads of suggestion for this? What hours does your Husband work, is there any way of you getting a small evening job while he watches baby? Nothing is impossible and you can think of a way around it if you try.

As Kevin137 says, soon as the child is born, ask for a reassessment.
I can't give any advice about CSA1 and your household income dropping, and asking for a reassessment, as I don't know the answers.

Personally I would cut back, enjoy my baby, take my mat leave and then have a rational think about returning to work or not. and maybe explore some more options.

Best of luck.