Relationship split

fluffnutter

Mojisola wrote: »

He shouldn't be able to walk away with everything he's put in otherwise he'll have been living there for free. If he hadn't been paying into the joint household, he would have been paying rent somewhere, wouldn't he?

I'm not saying he should get everything, rather that he has invested, and that should be taken into account when the assets are divided.

fluffnutter

C_Mababejive wrote: »

Morals have nothing to do with legal or civil entitlement.

Don't be ridiculous. Of course they do. What else do we base our legal framework upon other than morals? It's not perfect (and in this country it overly favours the rich) but that's its starting point.

Clive_Woody

Simple fact is that if there was no formal agreement signed by both parties then your friend simply claims that the £5k and other items were gifts to which her ex has no right to ask for them back.

If this went to court the judge would have to balance up the probability of this being true, but if ex was not paying 50% of mortgage and bills then I suspect this would be seen as balancing things out as part of the living arrangement.

C_Mababejive

Alas how quickly what was once love and indeed passion can learn to hate..or perhaps hate is too strong a word?

As i always say, the basic instincts of the human being include selfishness and self preservation.

It appears the OP is the new lover of the female home owner?

If we were addressing the female then perhaps we would remind her that she once loved this man and so they should part on good terms.

That would be good for her psychological wellbeing and also for the man involved.

Part as friends. Maybe one day you will help eachother again?

Teeniepops

fishybusiness wrote: »

Its a funny thing really, if she sells, and there is negative equity, she will be liable, and no doubt she will try to ask her ex for half of the liability.

However, if she stays and lives there, she is asking if legally she has to pay out anything to her ex?

Not saying the woman in question is trying to do this, but from experience this is common. The want to squeeze as much profit out of anything they can if it suits them, and drop it and run if it doesn't.

These people usually think they're hard done by and life owes them something too...

Just in my experience. Seen too many friends screwed over.

Funny how fast love is forgotten when money is involved.

DUTR

bestpud wrote: »

My guess is the OP is the new partner.

Personally, I'd give him the items he paid for as you'll otherwise end up going back and forth with various offers and refusals.

Then take the sum he paid towards the deposit, add on the mortgage payments he made and deduct the average rent for a property of that size over the period he lived there.

Pay him that amount but make sure you get him to sign something and a witness would be good too. I'd pay it by cheque personally.

If you want to keep the goods, offer him a fair second hand price or the option of collection by a set date - give him time to arrange a van or whatever. If he chooses payment, pay promptly.

This is my suspiscion too, perhaps the OP could give his new friend £5000-£6250 to pay off the ex and hope he is not the next 'victim'.

Chapperss

C_Mababejive wrote: »

Alas how quickly what was once love and indeed passion can learn to hate..or perhaps hate is too strong a word?

As i always say, the basic instincts of the human being include selfishness and self preservation.

It appears the OP is the new lover of the female home owner?

If we were addressing the female then perhaps we would remind her that she once loved this man and so they should part on good terms.

That would be good for her psychological wellbeing and also for the man involved.

Part as friends. Maybe one day you will help each other again?

Yes I am

However I believe in being fair and that you should treat others how your expect to be treated.

I have not released a lot of detail to this thread about other family loans/expenditure to them as they are not relevant in the eyes of the law.

If I were to explain all of that some of the people trying to make it personal may think different.

Anyway I think we have reached a point where we are starting to stray from the subject matter and into more personal areas, which was not the aim of me asking these questions.

Thank you for those that replied and kept it none personal and to the topic at hand I/we appreciate all you advice.

minimoneysaver

I suppose you could say that the 5k was given as a gift. I would be inclined to put together an 'offer' of a pay off, to allow the ex to be able to move on with his life.

I would look at the value of the goods and offer to pay a second hand value against them and an amount towards the initial cash payment.

Be very careful what is put in writing as it could be used against you in court.

CH27

Chapperss wrote: »

Yes I am

However I believe in being fair and that you should treat others how your expect to be treated.

I have not released a lot of detail to this thread about other family loans/expenditure to them as they are not relevant in the eyes of the law.

If I were to explain all of that some of the people trying to make it personal may think different.

Anyway I think we have reached a point where we are starting to stray from the subject matter and into more personal areas, which was not the aim of me asking these questions.

Thank you for those that replied and kept it none personal and to the topic at hand I/we appreciate all you advice.

Remember how you encourage her to behave now will be how you may be treated in the future.

Welshwoofs

Well the bottom line is that the house and mortgage may not be in his name, but if he feels your partner is treating him unfairly he could go to court and try to claim beneficial interest in the property.

By the way - you only mention his contributions to mortgage payments; how about utilities, food, insurances etc? Did your partner pay for all of that, was it split 50/50 or was it paid for by him?

The following link may be useful for information on what a claimant has to show to prove beneficial interest:
http://www.marilynstowe.co.uk/2010/10/01/the-law-on-cohabitation-and-property-who-owns-the-house-by-guest-blogger-paul-read/