DLA & hospital?

Ettenna

princessdon wrote: »

Because dla leads to carers - many people still care far more than 35 hours in op's situation. They go everyday for hours, wiping brows, washing them, moisturising lips, putting cream on dry skin, talking to them in the hope they can hear them, keeping their house afloat, paying bills for them, washing clothing, buying shampoo and toiletries etc. phone calls, emails, letters - I could go on but sure you get the idea.

The OP will still be caring for her daughter (even if out of choice) but so do many carers care out of choice as outside help is there. Add to this the fact that OP has probably reduced or given up work, carers allowance for her and financial assistance at this time is a lifeline.

That actually made me sob a little!! I do all of that but don't even think of it. My daughter turned 19 on Christmas Day and is currently 20 miles away. I go in nearly every day to see her. I am a student nurse so am very fortunate that I can visit most days currently. I bought nightdresses (and cut them all up the back) for her to wear, rather than the hospital gowns, so that she actually looks like a young lady rather than just a patient. This was actually a suggestion by one of the nurses. Therefore I do all her washing. Surely one cannot get carers for doing any off that!! It seems a little absurd.

Her rehab place will be nearly 50 miles away so I won't be seeing her anything I've as much.

princessdon

Ettenna wrote: »

That actually made me sob a little!! I do all of that but don't even think of it. My daughter turned 19 on Christmas Day and is currently 20 miles away. I go in nearly every day to see her. I am a student nurse so am very fortunate that I can visit most days currently. I bought nightdresses (and cut them all up the back) for her to wear, rather than the hospital gowns, so that she actually looks like a young lady rather than just a patient. This was actually a suggestion by one of the nurses. Therefore I do all her washing. Surely one cannot get carers for doing any off that!! It seems a little absurd.

Her rehab place will be nearly 50 miles away so I won't be seeing her anything I've as much.

The irony is that if not in hospital you could however, there appears to be an anomaly that if in hospital it doesn't. You are still caring 35 hours plus of that that I have no doubt, add to this dealing with drs, occ and phy therapists, helping massage limbs, etc. I've been there and watched my mum in the same position, so have a good idea what you do out of love . I'm just fairly sure the fact they are in hospital means you can't claim . Would like to be wrong though so if anyone knows differently please advise.

I didn't mean to upset you btw - just wanted to show how people do still act as a carer even if in hospital rehab and the financial drain it places on families. Really hoping she makes a recovery, small steps each week at a time.

Ettenna

Aww you didn't upset me. It's always odd seeing things like that written down.

I wouldn't qualify anyway for carers because I am a full time uni student.

You're right, I do spend time massaging her, creaming her hands & feet, dealing with medical teams, ensuring that all her reviews are done and nothing is missed, occasionally helping with washing, filling out forms for dla & esa, dealing with her car insurance and her bank, buying all her toiletries & doing her washing. It adds up!!

princessdon

Also to add if there is an insurance claim in place (adding to the hours you care as dealing with insurance, solicitors etc) adds up, keep a record of your time, expenses, parking, costs, petrol, travel to friends, lifts , phone calls. My mum got an interim payment to cover the above and loss of wages whilst the settlement was being "on hold" until the recovery was known.

miduck

Don't worry about anything sliverman says, he is a well known troll.

We have a friend in rehab at the moment, and Ettenna and princessdon, you are exactly right, despite being "cared for", friends and family still do a massive amount and their input is vital. I think it is such an import part of rehab, and makes the difference between the loved one becoming institutionalised, spending months in a hospital environment, and truly becoming well enough to have a quality of life again. Our friend had a little trip to the supermarket before Christmas, all wrapped up and in a wheelchair, but she was over the moon. Ettenna, I hope your daughter is on the path to recovery soon.

princessdon

Ettenna wrote: »

Aww you didn't upset me. It's always odd seeing things like that written down.

I wouldn't qualify anyway for carers because I am a full time uni student.

I just got a bit annoyed at silver mans comments that there were no additional care needs. . Nurses don't read trashy magazines, paint toe nails, whitter on for hours about what their friends are doing. Deal with finances and claims. You are under exceptional emotional and financial stress right now and there should be benefits that help you.

SandraScarlett

Princessdon has put everything so well. I am so sorry to hear of your problems, and hope that with love and care your daughter will improve. What a truly rotten time for you.

I sincerely hope the New Year will bring better news. God Bless you and your family.

xx

princessdon

Ettenna wrote: »

Aww you didn't upset me. It's always odd seeing things like that written down.

I wouldn't qualify anyway for carers because I am a full time uni student.

You're right, I do spend time massaging her, creaming her hands & feet, dealing with medical teams, ensuring that all her reviews are done and nothing is missed, occasionally helping with washing, filling out forms for dla & esa, dealing with her car insurance and her bank, buying all her toiletries & doing her washing. It adds up!!

It certainly does and I wish from the bottom of my heart that she recovers enough to know. My sister has "recalled memories". Even now little things trigger it. Example was this Halloween we were at my house with her baby and I have a strange monster stop cd. It was playing and she said she heard it before with me and mum singing. It was during her recovery whilst still paraplegic and none responsive. We ran around Hdu singing and stomping. She also has other things that trigger memories. I called her a fat !!!! as couldn't get knickers on (hard when they are lying down and limbs are stiff) but as she has been exposed at times I wanted knickers on her. My sister and I joked she had the biggest !!! in the family. Years later when pregnant I said her !!! was getting bigger, again she had vague memories of me calling her that etc. one day I hope you too get these flashbacks you can laugh about - it makes you realise you never regret a second of time you spent with them.

Parva

Please ignore Sliverman, he's the resident troll. My thoughts are with you Ettenna on this New Years Day. I doubt anyone here can understand your pain but I do understand the stress. Here's hoping that in 2013 things get better, take care hun.

FBaby

To be fair, 35 hours a week of full care is a long-time and few hospitals would agree for someone to be there for so long every day anyway. That and the fact that surely it is expected that a love one would provide some caring duties to them whilst they are in their most vulnerable state, I don't think it is wrong that carer's allowance can't be claimed whilst the person is in hospital. Whilst it is undoubtedly beneficial for the person to have the care of those who love them, it is not a vital need as this is already being paid for via NHS funding (at a much higher cost obviously).