Massively in Debt and Sad

Newyorkdreams

Debt_Free_Guy wrote: »

NewYorkDreams thanks for sharing your story on these forums. It's so easy for people to read that and make assumptive comments, but the truth is that dealing with debt is about facing up to the problem, which is what you clearly have done and I have nothing but admiration for that. It sounds like it will be a long haul out of your set of circumstances, but don't let that phase you. Chipping away at your debt is what most people have to do.

It's rare that people suddenly earn or inherit the money to pay off debt in one foul swoop.

You sound like a decent person and I really wish you well in the future with your debt goals, but just keeping working away at reducing your debt and over time credit organisations will have a rethink.

Thanks DFG for taking the time to post. It's funny and completely ironic that I've been taught that if you want something you have to work hard for it otherwise you don't value it as much like my education, my job, my house, my relationship, my friendships. I still have these values, however, they seemed to have got lost a long time when it came to money and more importantly, money I did not have but was someone elses. I am starting to see that and I want to apply these values. I actually want to pay back every single penny ourselves, partly because we are in a fortunate position that we can (I know that not everyone is), at the moment anyway and because I want to teach myself what it feels like to have to do without in order to pay the debt back. We got ourselves in this mess and we will get ourselves out of it. I don't think Dec 15 is actually that far away! If we do get into financial difficulties for example if I or my hubbie loses our job then we will have to look at Plan B but for now, I am quite up for the prospect of paying it back.

I have been on this forum for about a month now and I feel my mindset has completely changed. For so long debt was something that hung over us but now I feel so much better about it. It's still there, yes, but it has no control now. I have to admit that my transformation is still not complete! LOL I still want to buy things that are based on want and not need but I do actively question everything I buy now which, for me, is fantastic because my mindset has changed.:T I can't wait for the day that we start saving rather than paying debt back!! It must be amazing!!

I've had 2 no spend days in a row so I'm happy about that!

Thanks for stopping by.

NYD

Kipski

I have been through this twice now, once for myself after a reckless youth, and again over the last few years with my wife and hers.

Trust me, it does get better...

You will be amazed at how much money you wasted, and how much you can cut back, without really doing without or losing your lifestyle if you really try

One tip I can give you is to use this time to take on some new hobbies and interests, do those things you never found time for before. Sitting about the house dwelling on things wont help you...

There are plenty of things you can do to fill your time that don't cost too much and it doesn't have to be boring. Time is something you have, and it will pass much quicker and constructively if you treat it as an asset

If you take all the right steps now, you can be sure that the day will come when you are free of this burden.

Take control of your life, you will come out of this a stronger and more contented with your life if you do it right x

Crystal_clear_2

Morning NYD

Crystal clear is my new user name:D

I agree completely that a change in mindset is key. I'm with you completely about paying back every penny. I can't see an easy way out for us. It's going to be hard work and cutting back but I'm ok with that, I see it as a challenge and I can't resist a challenge.
The interview went well. I should have work from next week which is great. The daily rate is minimum £100 a day which should make a massive difference to how quickly we get the debt paid.
NYD how did the short listing go?
Off to catch up with my own diary. Have a good day keep warm x

Newyorkdreams

Crystal_clear wrote: »

Morning NYD

Crystal clear is my new user name:D

I agree completely that a change in mindset is key. I'm with you completely about paying back every penny. I can't see an easy way out for us. It's going to be hard work and cutting back but I'm ok with that, I see it as a challenge and I can't resist a challenge.
The interview went well. I should have work from next week which is great. The daily rate is minimum £100 a day which should make a massive difference to how quickly we get the debt paid.
NYD how did the short listing go?
Off to catch up with my own diary. Have a good day keep warm x

Hi Crystalclear - love the name! I'm with you on the challenge front, infact I'm getting quite sad looking forward to updating my signature. Months used to fly by and I never used to notice but since my LBM the days are really dragging until the next pay day. I'm hoping to pay about £1000 off in Feb so I'm waiting patiently for me to get paid!!! LOL

CONGRATULATIONS on getting your job!! :T:T:T:T Is it a permanent contract? Well done, that should help you get stuck into your debts! The shortlisting for mine happened yesterday so I'm hoping to hear next week sometime. Fingers crossed.

I was out with my friend last night, can you believe that we haven't exchanged christmas pressies yet. I bought my lunch, went out from 5-11.30pm, got a taxi home and only spent £24. I think that's good value for money :rotfl:

Have a lovely Saturday.

NYD xxx:)

Newyorkdreams

Oh and meant to say Crystal - well done on posting your debt!! It feels awful at first but it's the only way to go - well done! xxx

Crystal_clear_2

Hi NYD

No it's a temporary contract day by day really but there seems to be lots of work so fingers crossed.
It was really hard posting my debt, I am so embarrassed that we have let it get to this but it can only get better.
Hoping to overpay on our credit cards this month, probably not by much but every bit helps. Should be able to up the amounts by a lot once I start earning.
Anyway off for a run on the treadmill, before I change my mind.

Have a good day x

Newyorkdreams

Hi everyone - just wanted to say been lurking not posting recently but still here, plodding on. Life has been quiet - no overpayments, diet going badly, I've torn cartilage in my knee which has been agony and I've been diagnosed with IBS so have been a bit down and not really interested in eating healthy/looking after myself. (although it's not gallstones which was what they originally thought which is good news).

I've been keeping a spending diary since the beginning of the month and it's been very enlightening to say the least. I seem to be a very last minute reactive type of person (and here was me thinking I was organised - not so when it comes down to it!). I seem to 'spot purchase' quite a few things - whether it be birthday cards, diet coke at work or potatoes/peppers/whatever on the way home. I really need to cut it out and get a bit more organised. I've been good with my goals and have been taking my lunch to work every day and making myself eat all my fruit and veg which is great. Still aiming for my debt goals too but these debt updates take soooo long to come round. I guess January is always a slow month anyways I guess.

So a bit of positive news is that I was shortlisted for a new job which is a promotion and my interview is on Wednesday...eek. I know I'm self-sabotaging. Because I'm feeling down (and poorly) I'm thinking I won't get it so what's the point. I know what I need to do but any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated right now. It would mean an extra £350 a month which would help our debts massively right now but I want to get it more because I'm ready for the step up rather than the money being the only motivating factor (although very important right now because of debt situation).

NYD x

Newyorkdreams

Oooo think my thread has been moved into debt free diaries - thanks as was wanting to do that! x

clearmydebts

Hi NYD,

Sounds like there is a lot going on for you health wise. I have a friend who has IBS and she said stress and diet plays a big part in making it worse. Try not to feel too bad. I think a lot of people hibernate in Jaunary and then move up gears in Feb!

With regards the interview. That is brilliant news. If you got the job then you could pay back the debt quicker and it sounds like it will challenge you too! All positives. Maybe use the weekend to research the job so that you are prepared for the interview. You will regret it if you don't give it your best shot. I am a firm believer that if you get an interview then the organisation are prepared to give you the job. You just need to sell yourself to them. You have as good a chance as any other candidate. If you didn't then you wouldn't be shortlisted for interview xxx

Newyorkdreams

clearmydebts wrote: »

Hi NYD,

Sounds like there is a lot going on for you health wise. I have a friend who has IBS and she said stress and diet plays a big part in making it worse. Try not to feel too bad. I think a lot of people hibernate in Jaunary and then move up gears in Feb!

With regards the interview. That is brilliant news. If you got the job then you could pay back the debt quicker and it sounds like it will challenge you too! All positives. Maybe use the weekend to research the job so that you are prepared for the interview. You will regret it if you don't give it your best shot. I am a firm believer that if you get an interview then the organisation are prepared to give you the job. You just need to sell yourself to them. You have as good a chance as any other candidate. If you didn't then you wouldn't be shortlisted for interview xxx

Thank you Clearmydebts, your so right. Thanks for the advice about your friend, I know it's meant to be very common but I don't know anyone with it! At least, they are not saying. It's a bit embarassing so perhaps people don't want to say. As for the job, thanks for the advice, you are right. When I'm in a better frame of mind I'll kick myself for not giving it my best shot. I'm pre-determining the outcome before I've even tried. My goodness, I might be the best candidate!!! That would be nice.

NYD x