Living in Austerity

Mags30

@salesaddict So happy to see you here :T Of course I remember you! I have to start by asking are you still working on using up the stash of cosmetics? I remember the pics of the kitchen table covered in cosmetics and the Marks and Spencers habit!!

salesaddict wrote: »

My life has changed so dramatically since I first used to post on here. Family illness and bereavement have taken a heavy toll on me. But what I have learnt is to try to be as happy as possible in this moment. I've learnt that I am powerless over so many things.
xx

So sorry to hear life hasn't been kind to you in recent times Do you have a diary on here at the moment that I can suscribe to? Maybe I'll go back to the "no toiletries thread" but it's so fast moving that keeping up with it is very time consuming. I think my time would be better spent on the surveys and mystery shopping threads.

salesaddict

Oh that's great that you remember me so well Mags. Thanks so much.
The difference in me now is that I understand the roots of my shopping habit and my hoarding. In January 2012 I had a massive clear out. I gave black sacks of usable stuff to the charity shop that supports the Hospice who looked after my Dad in his very last days.

I'm ashamed to say I also had to dump at least 6 sackfulls as some lotions and potions were nearly 20 years old. Eye watering stupid in so many ways.

Then having to clear our Family home of my Mum and Dads beautifully ordered possessions made me realise that all this shopping and hoarding was so pointless.

Half the time I didn't even know where things were I had so much.
And so much debt as a result.

Then in April this year I had the trauma of watching my Dh come close to death. I've learnt so much about myself since then. The nature of addiction.
He is doing well now and in recovery. So am I.

God this has turned into War and Peace. Sorry Love. I try to stay away from the Toiletries thread. I find all the reviews so tempting.

I'm so sorry life is so difficult over there ATM. My beloved Mum was from Cork. I do love the Irish. Particularly their delightful sense of humour and capacity to survive come what may and be happy. That's what you will do xx

Mags30

Oh wow, salesaddict that is so beautifully written I don't even know how to respond. I hope that you still buy yourself some nice things, there isn't any need to feel guilty if you are actually going to use the things you buy rather than hoard them.

Interestingly on my trips to the local small town here I've seen a necklace and a pair of boots I really like in the windows of small local shops. Can't afford to buy them and I don't need them anyway but it has me thinking that I definitely don't need big department stores or Topshop to find fashionable things to wear. If there's less choice it's actually much easier to choose.

Helgathehairy_2

Mags30 wrote: »

Big dogs are my favourite, I'm not really a handbag-dog type of girl. I hope Bailey's not on the Royal Canin!!! My mothers cat gets that and it's definitely not a MSE friendly price!

Worse, he had a doggie version of Irritable Bowel Syndrome so is on prescription food €76 for a bag which does about 3 weeks!! (Although he's a bit off his food at the moment cause he was getting too many treats over Christmas!)

I can sympathise with the petrol (although I'm diesel) €75 to fill the car! And that only does 2 weeks!

Mags30

Ran into "toxic friend" in town earlier She excitedly showed me the clothes she had bought which were "only €80". She had also purchased a towel, price unknown but I'm guessing about €10 and had a bag of cosmetics from Boots, about €25 worth I'd say. Plus she had just finished dinner in the hotel costing €12-14 I expect. She lives with her parents and this is how she spends her social welfare money while I can barely afford my daily coffee which doubles as an excuse to get out for a bit.

But here's what really annoyed me :mad: She listed all the presents she got, there were gift vouchers to the value of €125 for local restaurants and a beauty salon. All ok so far but then she asked me what presents I got and I replied truthfully "none, my mother gave me some money, that's all". She couldn't understand this so I actually had to explain that I have no brothers and sisters to buy me presents. Then she mentioned "aunts and uncles" so I had to explain that my aunt has Alzheimer's and doesn't even know its Christmas. She then proceeded to ask if I'd prefer to get presents :huh: I explained that everybody would prefer to get presents given the choice.

Please don't feel sorry for me for not getting presents, I'm not in any way short of nice things, you may have noticed my slightly materialistic tendencies. I expect I have far more than many, many people who use MSE. It's the insensitivity of the conversation that has me taken aback.

Mags30

Helgathehairy wrote: »

Worse, he had a doggie version of Irritable Bowel Syndrome so is on prescription food €76 for a bag which does about 3 weeks!! (Although he's a bit off his food at the moment cause he was getting too many treats over Christmas!)

I can sympathise with the petrol (although I'm diesel) €75 to fill the car! And that only does 2 weeks!

Wait till you post your SOA (statement of affairs) missy!! They'll have you re-homing Bailey ASAP :rotfl:
But seriously is this a long term thing? Even if it's not pets used to expensive food tend to refuse to eat cheaper food. I've seen pet shop offers on a few of the Groupon type sites where you could effectively get half price Royal Canin but I suspect the food you buy at the moment is vet only.

Helgathehairy_2

Mags30 wrote: »

Wait till you post your SOA (statement of affairs) missy!! They'll have you re-homing Bailey ASAP :rotfl:
But seriously is this a long term thing? Even if it's not pets used to expensive food tend to refuse to eat cheaper food. I've seen pet shop offers on a few of the Groupon type sites where you could effectively get half price Royal Canin but I suspect the food you buy at the moment is vet only.

It is vet only. And to be fair I'd prefer to pay the extra rather than have to clean poop off the kitchen floor every morning!

I remember 'Toxic Friend' from before. She annoys me even more now because I'm on Jobseekers myself and it's so hard to cover necessities from it. DH is on Back to Education allowance which is the same amount. It's the cars that are the major expense. But being rural we really do need both of them.

I've started a diary which is just a summary of what happened in the last year, I'm not allowed post links as a new user yet, I'm warning you though it's pretty miserable reading. I had a bad year.

Oh and I'm an only child as well so I understand the extra pressure that comes with that. It's my mum, dad and aunt and I do all the driving to do the shopping, doctors appointments, visiting etc. And all paperwork, like house insurance, septic tank registration (which they'll fail if inspected), medical card renewals etc.

Mags30

Hey don't worry about not having loads of cheerful things to write about, lots of diaries here start from a fairly low place and often (30 pages later!) things are better. MSE is great because people are so honest + for people who prefer to display perfect lives online....there's facebook :rotfl:
Plus you do have one very big positive to talk about

"toxic friend" will continue to make occasional appearances as I'll never be able to shake her off completely. She is evidence that not everybody in Ireland has money problems.

Mags30

Hoping this works: the link to Helgas diary, please suscribe and welcome her back to MSE https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4363351

Mags30

So after all that I actually got a present!! My mother who knew nothing about the conversation with toxic friend as she was away all day came home with a present for me :A My mother doesn't really buy me things as she never knows what to get for me and would rather give me money.

She got me a fabulous black and white bath towel with a mint colour trim from Carolyn Donnelly at Dunnes. She bought it because it was half price in the sale and knew I'd like it because I have the matching hand towel which I bought for myself before Christmas. She also thought about buying me a Yankee Candle but didn't because she had no idea which fragrance I might want. But considering the perfect timing this gift makes me very happy

And why is everybody buying towels all of a sudden, @polesalot has new towels and toxic friend bought a towel today as well :huh: