Newbie going BR on Friday

ohforpennies

Hi guys & gals - I have been reading this forum for nearly a year, debating whether to follow all the advice I have been given by CCCS and CAB to go BR and have finally bitten the bullet and booked my court date for Friday 9th November. I guess I have been trying to do the honourable thing and pay off my debts - 46K in total (wow - how did it get to be sooooo much) and after my last chat today with my adviser who couldn't actually believe I still hadn't done the deed, he finally told me that I just needed to be a grown up about my situation, accept that I was potless with no realistic expectation of EVER paying off my debt, and to finally do the only reasonable thing and go BR.

It really isn't an easy decision though is it? I have battled with paying my debt off for the last 8 years and had I done this earlier it would all be over by now - but anyone who says it is an easy option cannot have any idea of the agonising and gut wrenching fear/dismay that takes over. The fear of BR is collossal. Thanks to you posters, I have realised that there can be life after BR and that if you can do it, then so can I.:eek:

Wish me luck please - can I join the BR Club for November please?:eek:

lexy1981

I was declared BR this morning after years of juggling debts and I can honestly say that I have not felt this happy and relaxed in years. The hardest part is making the decision to do it, thats an achievement in itself so well done you and good luck on Friday.

mynumber

Hi, I too tried and tried to carry on paying my debts, so much so my health sufferd, towards the end of summer i knew i couldnt go on. Sept 10th was my new begining and i dont regret it one bit, I dont look back anymore that was then this is now. I have the best nights sleep now. I wish i had done it earlier and if your in the same situation as i was i cant recommend it enough, if you have had advice from cccs or cab, good luck for friday, you wont need it though K X

mynumber

lexy1981 wrote: »

I was declared BR this morning after years of juggling debts and I can honestly say that I have not felt this happy and relaxed in years. The hardest part is making the decision to do it, thats an achievement in itself so well done you and good luck on Friday.

CONGRATULATIONS Lexy :T

ohforpennies

Thanks everyone - still terrified - don't want it to affect my better half though ....... but as I'm not much fun to live with (make that for the last few years since the debt really became unmanageable) here's hoping for a better life for him too.

Oh - I opened a cashminder account in the summer in anticipation of BR at some point - as it is my only account used for DD's & rent, am I right in thinking the OR will let me keep it open?

Any advice for the OR interview? Have read the checklist (cuppa, go the loo first etc) but can't help being more worried about this than the court. My debts are years old and I have tried to pay them - am I likely to get a b***ocking for not going BR sooner?

Watto30

Hello,

I don't often post on here am more of a reader than a writer but saw this post and just wanted to say good luck to the OP, I went bankrupt in September 2005 and believe me there is life after BR, you are bound to feel nervous and scared but you will be fine and it will be like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders once it is done, although mine was six years ago now I can't imagine the whole process has changed too dramatically but I was the same, nervous and embarrassed more than anything that I had let things get so out of control that there was no other option than BR, to not have the daily headaches, stress and worry of a cloud of debt over your head is a relief in itself, get the court day out of the way and look forward to life again x

ohforpennies

Especially for Watto30 - THANK YOU for your kind words. You are right - it is the shame and the fear that have held me back. I know I am not a bad person but if we were judged on our financial activities I feel I would be publicly stoned!

To all posters - you are amazing people who give courage and hope to those of us yet to start the journey - and it is a journey and not the end of the road that I thought it would be. I will keep telling myself that and I know all will be well.

lexy1981

Cant see the OR being annoyed by the fact that you delayed BR in an attempt to try and take back control of your debts yourself. Must admit I am nervous about my OR interview though, had a call from the OR office this afternoon which was pretty quick as I only went bankrupt this morning; he was really nice and said I would here from the OR within a week. Ill let you know how it goes.

obcomp

Its not something to be worried about. My OR basically said, just be honest with me and don't give me any reason to investigate you. My BR was a mixture of bad personal financial and business decisions, overspending and burying my head up my bottom! I was honest and able to walk away knowing I'd done the right thing for me. Servicing those debts puts your life on hold ... put it all down to a lesson learned and move on.

Things definitely get better from the day you make the decision to walking out of court to your OR meeting. Then before you know it, you're 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, years down the line.

mynumber

ohforpennies wrote: »

Especially for Watto30 - THANK YOU for your kind words. You are right - it is the shame and the fear that have held me back. I know I am not a bad person but if we were judged on our financial activities I feel I would be publicly stoned!

To all posters - you are amazing people who give courage and hope to those of us yet to start the journey - and it is a journey and not the end of the road that I thought it would be. I will keep telling myself that and I know all will be well.

I think we all felt shame and fear at some point leading up to bankruptcy, but to be honest we/you should feel proud we have had the courage to sort out our debts,hold your head up high.
We all need help when going through this, i know i got support from other posters on here, i would like to think i can now give someone at the start of the journey some of the support i got,

K X

tiggerbodhi

ohforpennies wrote: »

don't want it to affect my better half though ....... but as I'm not much fun to live with (make that for the last few years since the debt really became unmanageable) here's hoping for a better life for him too.

Oh - I opened a cashminder account in the summer in anticipation of BR at some point - as it is my only account used for DD's & rent, am I right in thinking the OR will let me keep it open?

Any advice for the OR interview? Have read the checklist (cuppa, go the loo first etc) but can't help being more worried about this than the court. My debts are years old and I have tried to pay them - am I likely to get a b***ocking for not going BR sooner?

I can only comment from my own BR and decision, the only regret is "damn should have done it two years ago" it is no failure to go BR, you are dealing with the things in your life and moving forward, getting back up and living as you should be, trust me the relief is very tangible, the court staff and the OR were all very nice, why wouldnt they be, they are doing a job and they want to go home happy thinking they have helped people, don't feel guilty for the losses of the banks etc that are your creditors, add up the interest and charges they have had over the years...

It will affect your better half, he will have a happier, less stressed and worried partner who probaby wont be dreading the phone or the postman

The OR will probably say you can keep that one, I was allowed to keep my Barclays one by the OR (Barclays didn't quite have the same opinion, but then they were a creditor for a loan)

No the OR won't tell you off, for either getting in debt or trying to deal with it, as long as the reasons for the BR are clear and not reckless, even if they are the "worst" that can happen is a BRO for five years but think you have to be very reckless to get one or be hiding stuff.

Be 100% open and honest with the Court and OR, alos your SOA, put everything on there no matter how trivial or does not match the "norm" you can discuss with the OR, they dont make you sell your first born anymore!

Good luck...:)