Parent selling property and giving money to children

Fire_Fox

I agree, you don't know what you will need to do. Sadly some older people end up like an incredibly heavy toddler in the amount of care they need, cannot be left for a moment, regular lifting or turning, messing the bed, awake multiple times in the night. If your back goes or you collapse with exhaustion or an infectious illness you may not be able to offer this level of care. How do you stop someone with dementia climbing out of a window or leaving the gas on in the middle of the night? There is a reason there are purpose built/ converted care homes, CCTV cameras and twenty four hour staffing.

CLAPTON

how old is your mother?
is your father alive; if so how old is he?
does she have any other money for herself?
what is her income?
why does she want to give the money away?

Madjock

I've had my query answered, and am very grateful for the pointer to saga. I'm not going to enter into a prolonged debate about my mum needing a care home when she is older, I know her better than anyone here.

Thanks for the help and advice, but subject closed for me.

bitsandpieces

Worth remembering that not going into a care home does not necessarily equate to not needing to spend money on care. A relative of mine was able to live out their life at home because (as well as family support) they had carers come into their home. Deprivation of assets might also be an issue if your mum needed to claim means-tested benefits.

If you contacted an organisation like Age UK they could talk you and your mum through the relevant issues - so, assuming she does go ahead with the gift, you are all fully informed.

poppysarah

So your mum wants to give away all her cash?

Would this 'enable' her to claim benefits?
I would expect her not to get anything if she has chosen to give away all her assets.

It's wrong of adult, independent children to take money like that from a parent.
Even if you need it, would you not rather that your mother had cash in the bank and no worry about paying bills.

martindow

shegar wrote: »

Yea too true, my hubby had a severe stroke 4 yrs ago at the age of 49, he has been at home with me for the past 3 , but im getting to the point of struggling to look after him......

Ive always said he
" would never be put in a home" , but now im not so sure, im getting burnt out and he as to go into respite nursing care one week every four, cos im totally runned out,its so very hard nursing someone 24/7.....Never say never.....

Shegar, sorry to hear about your situation. Please don't see it as a failure to get some assistance in. You will be of more help to your husband if you are not exhausted - no one can be working or on call 24 hours a day.

Most of us would prefer to provide the care but getting a good carer in to provide some respite is essential for both of you.

shegar

martindow wrote: »

Shegar, sorry to hear about your situation. Please don't see it as a failure to get some assistance in. You will be of more help to your husband if you are not exhausted - no one can be working or on call 24 hours a day.

Most of us would prefer to provide the care but getting a good carer in to provide some respite is essential for both of you.

Well do to so many county council cut backs, my respite is worth so much to me, and I do need that break more than anything else........

I do have a carer come in the mornings which is a great help, paid for via direct payments and the respite........

If I want "crossroads" to come and sit with him for a couple of hours it will cost me£13.70 per hour............So I do all I can in the week I get............
I dont think the OP wants to hear the negatives of 24/7 caring,but until your in that position its are to understand what its like on a day to day living............................

paddedjohn

OP, if all goes well and your Mum sells up and gives you the cash, does she still have enough savings/income to pay her rent/council tax etc without claiming benefits? If not she could run into problems.