What to do!

alamaya

Hi all,

apologies for the vague post but my heads a mess.

We have been in debt a few years had lightbulb i think 3years ago and been paying it all off ever since doing really well.

I in this time had a daughter and went back to work full time. Again all being well.

Then shock got pregnant naturally after needing IVF for daughter and currently 36 weeks pregnant.

Still going back to work full time next July so everything moneywise was a ok.

Until hubby tells me his work place is in trouble, not sure if going into administration. Not to worry though boss has plans to sort it.

Last night his words were well we know we definately have this months wages.

What! meaning that end of Nov we might be on one salary and mine being maternity pay (albeit not SMP but still).

I dont know where to start to prepare for this, what to do, how to organise.

Anyone point me in the best direction.

Ps i know all my debts, interest rates etc sadly cant move to better deals as even though i have not missed any payments the amount of debt i have is still too much of a risk for them.

Thanks in advance

FireWyrm

OK, survival time. Inventory the following immediately

1) Baby supplies in stock (food, clothes, nappies, equipment). If you are short of food, you have two breasts, use them. Consider alternatives to disposable nappies if you dont have a good stock for at least the first month.

2) Your predicted income for this month
3) Your predicted outgoings for this month

4) What items on list 3 can you safely either dodge for a month, or ring up and ask for help. For instance, if you are paying a mortgage, often there are holiday allowances built in for a max of 3 months. This could be very useful. Can you drop your utility bills to the minimum? What else can you get rid of?

5) What food do you have in the house and what do you need. I'm not talking about frozen pizza, I'm talking about absolute necessities such as sugar, flour, veg etc. I can feed my family of 4 on £100 a month if I have to...yes, its possible if not comfortable, but this is survival...eating and heating not cordon bleu.

6) Is there anyone you can ask for help? Short term loan perhaps?

7) Anything you can sell? What can you get rid of...TV? Phone? Broadband? etc. Do you have gold? Liguidate it...now.

The aim of the game is for the next 30 days until you know one way or the other what is happening, you MUST NOT spend any more than absolutely necessary. You need every SINGLE penny you can hang onto and if that means you go hungry a few days to make the food stretch, do it.

That's the best advice I can offer without knowing more.

BlushingRose

FireWyrm wrote: »

OK, survival time. Inventory the following immediately

1) If you are short of food, you have two breasts, use them.

I understand that it's not always as simple as that.

Also, she's pregnant, advising her to go hungry is possibly not the best advice either....

honey10

Maybe if you posted a SOA then we could give some direction of cut backs etc
Congratulations on the impending arrival, even if he doesn't have the best timing.
Most of all, don't panic, not just yet.

FireWyrm

BlushingRose wrote: »

I understand that it's not always as simple as that.

Also, she's pregnant, advising her to go hungry is possibly not the best advice either....

We are all too fat. Human evolved to eat far less than they do right now. She wont die if she misses a meal or two, like we wont die if we dont watch tv. A doctor once told me that a baby is the perfect parasite, it will continue to draw nutrients from the mothers body to feed itself long after she has ceased to consume enough for the both of them. Short of absolute and dire starvation, the baby is in no danger what so ever if she misses a few meals and it's more important right now that there is atleast something, rather than nothing at all because it was eaten last week.

Breast feeding is also exactly that simple. Commercial milk is expensive and largely unnecessary, so much so that they are now prohibited from even suggesting that powdered milk is an alternative to breast feeding. The quickest way to save between £30 and £50 a month is to stop buying it. Its also very important that a mother at least tries as her milk will fail if she doesnt suckle for 36 hours. You have no choice after that if the milk doesnt continue to flow. Commercial powdered milk is an expensive luxury in this situation and all reasonable steps should be taken to avoid using it.

honey10

FireWyrm wrote: »

We are all too fat. Human evolved to eat far less than they do right now. She wont die if she misses a meal or two, like we wont die if we dont watch tv. A doctor once told me that a baby is the perfect parasite, it will continue to draw nutrients from the mothers body to feed itself long after she has ceased to consume enough for the both of them. Short of absolute and dire starvation, the baby is in no danger what so ever if she misses a few meals and it's more important right now that there is atleast something, rather than nothing at all because it was eaten last week.

Breast feeding is also exactly that simple. Commercial milk is expensive and largely unnecessary, so much so that they are now prohibited from even suggesting that powdered milk is an alternative to breast feeding. The quickest way to save between £30 and £50 a month is to stop buying it. Its also very important that a mother at least tries as her milk will fail if she doesnt suckle for 36 hours. You have no choice after that if the milk doesnt continue to flow. Commercial powdered milk is an expensive luxury in this situation and all reasonable steps should be taken to avoid using it.

That's a pretty idealistic view. What if she can't breastfeed?
You know nothing of this woman other than she's pregnant and may have some money issues. What if she has a medical issue which means she can't just skip a meal or two? I know that it would make me quite ill...

DMPhereIcome

I couldn't read and run...I'm not best qualified to advise on what to do although a statement of affairs is the best place to start, there are far more knowledgeable people on the site than me who will be along soon to help you through I'm sure

And for the record, if it helps, I couldn't breast feed despite all efforts from the specialist midwife...the phrase "you can take a horse to water but you can't make him drink" springs to mind

You'll be fine x

jules888

I loved breastfeeding my 2 boys!Quicker,easier and lot cheaper than bottle feeding.

DMPhereIcome

Well, now you've had plenty advice on breastfeeding...perhaps some more help with regard to your situation would help!

anyone....?

FireWyrm

It was a single line in a post with lots of other substance. The truth is that most women can breast feed and only a very tiny minority cannot. In this case she is (until she knows otherwise) on the breadline and every single penny counts. THAT was the point.

As for going without, again, it was illustrating the point that you can if you must and this situation is potentially one of those times. No one in the western world would die if they miss a meal...no one. Most of us have enough fat reserves to survive extreme starvation for weeks. I'm not advocating that at all, but some of the responses to a suggestion of moderation are clearly over-reacting to the idea of missing a meal or two. Pregnancy is not an illness, you are not in a delicate condition as was once a fashionable idea, hominids have been carrying the next generation successfully through drought, starvation, wars and social upheaval and ice-ages for nearly a million years and all mammals for considerably longer than that. We as a species were built to survive all but the most extreme situations. Sometimes, we have to dig deep for a little of that primal resilience, but make no mistake, it's there just below the surface if needed.

OP, the REST of my advice is sound. What do you have, what do you need. Until you know how this is going to pan out, conserve any and all resources using any means necessary.

citizenkitten

are you planning to take more than the minmum maternity leave? if so what are the pay scales?

what is the minimum redundancy notice for your husband? if he has worked there a long time, will be more than 1 month, re read the TCs of his employment contract. adminsitration does not mean they cant pay their staff redundancy notices.

babies are expensive but CONGRATUALTIONS TO YOU AND YOURS! there is really great baby spending advice here, i have to say having been raised in some poverty stricken places, babies are just as happy and loved even if their possessions are limited to bottle, nappy and full tummy.