Spending Money to Make Yourself Feel Better

lesgeo2012

My triggers have been brought about by depression.
Feelings of worthlessness= increased eating and spending.

Now I stop comparing myself to people who I think are better, prettier and smarter than myself. I exercise, stay away from negative people and situations, emotional drains and basically anybody who drags me down. I walk frequently and try to get my buzz from saving money, declutter the house frequently to keep my mind clear. I double think if I really need to buy something, ok sometimes I have a little slip up, but most of the time it works!

Learning2Budget

I do this, or rather used to....I am getting better. My triggers are when i am stressed, i need a little treat and it all gets messy. So now i have a little treat budget and when i spend on this i am not allowed to feel guilt cos it is pure treat.
I also know not to set my goals too high! If i am mega strict i fail cos i don't cope well with pressure. So i relax back a little but keep my eye on the game then i cope better. Eg. NSD for Sept i have done well cos i had a treat budget and i have relaxed.
L2B.x

wants.to.be.debt.free

krustylouise wrote: »

I, unfortunately, do this too. I go for months without meal planning and racking up debts and feeling quite chilled out and almost ostrich like {head in the sand} and then realisation hits and I spend the next 2 weeks stressing meal planning, buying budget everything and formulating a plan to pay things off, and then I seem to lose track of things again.

Going through a break up at the moment, so feeling quite low and financially as a household we've taken quite a hit. Also diet wise my body has never been worse :0/

x

Oh my goodness, we could be twins.
I have spent many months/years doing this, and thought it was just me. The guilt i feel is awful.

Hope you get sorted and settled soon.

all the best.

sharronej

[QUOTE=Learning2Budget;So now i have a little treat budget and when i spend on this i am not allowed to feel guilt cos it is pure treat.
L2B.x[/QUOTE]


This is a really good idea and the times when I manage to stick to my budget best are when we have a weekend treat budget - not always possible I'm afraid but false economy when we don't budget it in.

immoral_angeluk

I have a history of anxiety/depression and am guilty of 'retail therapy' too. If I am having a particular downer (rough week or something) I will too easily buy a 'treat' on the credit card. Only way to avoid it is by cutting up the card or focusing on how bad it'll make you feel after and how much more positive it would be to not be in more debt/be able to pay all your bills etc...

blondie_80

Hi all,

I've read this forum for absolutely ages, but never posted before! This thread really made me want to though, because this is exactly what I am like with everything; food money etc etc.
I am 32 now but have had problems with debt and overspending since my early 20's when I was very depressed and still struggling now.
I completely get people who are saying they can get it together and do well for a few weeks, I try hard and pay off debt, then get paid and think 'oh I deserve this because I've been so good' and then go back to square one.

It's so good to know that there are people the same out there!

Anyway, thanks for reading. Might have to post more often now!

jet77

@Blondie - thanks for posting!! It's so good to know there are others going through the same ... although ideally none of us would be:p

@Jon - Great to hear of success stories and I think you've really hit the nail on the head there about encouragement from friends and yesterday for the first time I took the step of opening up and telling a good friend about everything. I was dreading her coming over and very nearly chickened out and text her to say not to come. But I feel so much better for talking things through with her. She then proceeded to turn up today with more food than I could dream of bless her. She was really worried that I'd refuse it and be too proud to take it but I am so so grateful to her and very lucky to have such an amazing person in my life :A

@L2B - How did you decide on the amount for your treat budget? I've done £15 a week on mine for unnecessary spends. It used to be £10 after CAFC's challenge a few years back but when I got back on the waggon (which I've since fallen off a couple of times ) I decided to allow for inflation and give myself £15. That's for me and 2 DD's so a fiver a head ... would you say that was about right ... I struggle to stick to it

What would others set as a treat budget?

themull1

I know loads of people like that, me included. Don't beat yourself up about it!! Ive wasted loads of food leaving it out by mistake. I tend to give mine to the cat - why not get a cat? :rotfl:

blondie_80

I usually spend about £10 a week on treats, just to stop myself feeling completely deprived (!) and find that this works much better than trying to stop unnecessary spending entirely. I worked out that it's better for me to pay off my debts at a slower rate, but to keep mentally sound by still having treats and being able to go out with my friends etc, than to restrict all spending but be utterly miserable.
It's always different for everyone I suppose, but about £40-50 a month on treats is better than a massive blow out when I get paid!

heartbreak_star

Definately put a tiny treat budget in, it seems to stop blowouts. This goes with food too - and sugarfree jelly can really seem like a treat sometimes!

I read somewhere that someone didn't want to cut up a card, so they froze it in a big ice cream tub full of water (maybe coloured so you can't see in?) and if they still wanted the purchase by the time the card had completely defrosted, they bought it.

I think we should keep this thread going to support each other. Good Luck!

HBS x