Mediation query

tgon

My son has been asked to attend mediation regards his children residency. They currently live with his ex. He is unsure as the gov't web site seems to indicate not to whilst social services are involved (which they are, based on a NSPCC complaint against her) and his ex has made very recent accusations of violence and child molestation which involved the police and the court (which were swiftly thrown out of court with the judge slamming his ex and her solicitor for wasting court time). Additionally, his ex dosent seem to want to abide too well by a court order regards the visitation agreement. He has already instructed his solicitor to ask hers for an agreed residency.

So, apart from the duplication, going into mediation with a catalogue of contradiction, defamation and outright hostility seems more waste of time, money and unnecessary aggravation. He wants to do the right thing so would a separate mediation (ie not face to face) be more appropriate?

Fire_Fox

Asked by whom to attend mediation?

flashnazia

I'm not sure about family mediation but I would have though mediation would involve one-2-one meetings first? Otherwise it would rapidly turn into a slagging match!

tgon

Fire_Fox wrote: »

Asked by whom to attend mediation?

He has been asked by his ex's solicitor.

jackomdj

Why not ask their social worker. At least that way your son will be able to say yes or no with the knowledge that the social team will be behind him.

daska

tgon wrote: »

He has been asked by his ex's solicitor.

Is the ex's solicitor actually aware of SS involvement? DSD's mum didn't mention a lot of pertinent facts to her solicitor, we could hear his jaw hit the floor when we rang and informed him of the full facts...

tgon

That's very useful. Apparently she has changed her solicitor recently (after the court case) so I cannot be sure they have the full facts of the matter.

Pollycat

Not sure if it's the same thing but a friend of mine has been attending mediation as part of his divorce process.

Access to the children has been discussed & agreed and also financial matters.

At each session, I belive both parties were given the option of whether to be in the same room (together with the mediator) or if they want to be in separate rooms with the mediator speaking to one person then going to a different room to speak to the other party.

Fire_Fox

tgon wrote: »

He has been asked by his ex's solicitor.

Agree with those who have said ask the social worker and be sure the solicitor knows the full story, preferably getting copies of the documents rather than a verbal account that can later be twisted and thrown back at him. Saying no outright might look unreasonable - which might be the point of asking - but if social services say no then it's a done deal. At the end of the day if she is hostile or defamatory in mediation it won't exactly cover her in glory!