Young and Hopeless!!

DCFC79

Id try to get back on speaking terms with your parents and post up the soa.

Beautiful-Moose

CJay 1987 - I think I may give them a call this weekend as it kinda hard to do it when the parents are around. I read your post as well. I can totally relate. Well done to you too!

Dancingfairy - It has been really hard. My dad didn't work for 6 years until the beginning of this year and things have got a lot easier money wise than they have been but a million miles away from perfect. I think they are part of a debt scheme from some of the letters I have seen lying around but as with most things in my house when it concerns money I am left in the dark and only told about things at the last minute.

woohoo_postingid - Yes I pay my parents £150 in rent. And no there has been no attempt to pay back the money. I am currently paying the card off at £120 a month so I consider that to be rent money too, only not into their hands as such.

This is my own SOA

Salary - £1283.55

Rent - £150
Car Loan - £196.42
Mobile phone - £40
Card 1 - £80
Card 2 - £120
Gym - £55
Travelcard - £131.40
Lovefilm - £5
Petrol - £40

Leaving me with £465 a month. That might seem like a lot but more often than not I end up doing my own weekly shopping which is £40-£50 a month. I am going to cancel the Lovefilm as I can find better things to do with £5. I have today applied to my works Season Ticket Loan so that will come straight out of my wages and save me £30 a month.

So next month I have given myself a budget of £50 a week to eat/drink/socialise and the rest of the money in my account is to be emergency money. E.g forgotten travelcard, car stuff. Food.

Any suggestions welcome!

midnight_express

Do you NEED the car ? Getting rid of it would be a massive saving.

Beautiful-Moose

DCFC79 - We do speak and are often on great terms but when it comes to money we just don't talk about it in my house. It's like the forbidden convo and I can already see the negative effect it is having on my sister. She is constantly worrying about her money in an unhealthy way as she doesn't want to go down the same road as me and my parents.

Beautiful-Moose

midnight express - I have often thought about selling my car but I do need my car. I have just paid for a years worth of road tax and insurance so maybe nearer the end of it's term I may think about giving it up for a year to help the debt situation.

Jox

I can relate, I'm quite "sensible" with money so often bail out the folks when they have problems.

I moved out of the family home when I couldn't stand their mismanagement of money any more (there were bank charges and unpaid direct debits from my parent's account and it was stressing me out).

I rented a small room for 6 months and didn't have a tv, just went to the gym and saved some money by being frugal.

Then I decided to buy a flat and the parents suddenly realised they had 20K to give me, which was my marriage fund apparently, for a deposit. I didn't want it but it was "forced" upon me to make them happy, they said.

Once I bought my flat, I got a call from my mum asking for the money back! I couldn't get a loan for 20k just for 10k and spent the next 7 years paying it back with interest! I think I paid back around 16k.

I feel sorry for mum and do give her money every month but where I will buy cheap things for myself or things that last years, she will run up a big catalogue bill or spend thousands on cosmetic surgery!

Oh well, we can't change them, just our reactions and put ourselves first so that we manage our own money and plan for our own futures.

Heffi1

Jox wrote: »

Oh well, we can't change them, just our reactions and put ourselves first so that we manage our own money and plan for our own futures.

Very true, you have to look after yourself first so that you don't go down the river with them.

theoretica

Have you considered cutting up your cards so that you can tell your mother you have done so and she can't spend on them?

Beautiful-Moose

Jox -

Oh well, we can't change them, just our reactions and put ourselves first so
that we manage our own money and plan for our own futures.

I agree with this. I have got to stop making others happy before myself, parents included!

theoretica - I may just do this! It may be the best thing to do all round, I don't spend and run up more debt and the parents can't use me anymore.

woohoo_postingid

So, your parents owe you £2k but you are paying them £150 per month ? How about agreeing with them that you won't pay them rent until the £2k is cleared (ie around 13 months).