Any way for a quicky, inexpensive divorce?

fluffnutter

vyle wrote: »

I think both of our names are on the mortgage, which I may change, seeing as the flat is actually mine..

vyle wrote: »

...why can't it be as simple as changing a facebook status *sigh*

Oops. You seem a little naive about civil partnerships/marriage. The flat's not solely yours I'm afraid, and divorcing isn't as simple as changing a facebook status! This is a fairly pointless question and I'm really not trying to berate you... but didn't you appreciate all this before you married??

As for your question, how long have you been separated? It should be easy to divorce if you both wish to split but it might depend on how long you've been apart.

WelshWoofer

I was in a similar position with my husband and we divorced without legal help using the forms you can download - cost us £340 but I didn't consider asking for the fees to be waived as we both have fairly well paid jobs.
The house was mine (from before the marriage) and as long as you both agree you can write on the forms that a satisfactory financial agreement has been reached between both parties and do NOT have to include any details. When you divorce your partner you do have to give a reason though - mine was unreasonable behaviour which my exhusband agreed to in order to speed things through.
Your partner will see everything you write on the form as he'll get a copy and will have to sign a form agreeing to what you have written, so if you can agree what to put first there should be no dispute from the court. I didn't have to attend court, have a solicitor or do anything more complicated than fill in a couple of basic forms. Very quick and straightforward.

vyle

Nicki wrote: »

Well it is. Unless you choose to get married or enter into a civil partnership because you want some degree of legal protection and to confer a sense of permanence on the relationship.

If you wanted a throw away relationship, why did you bother with the expense and palavar of encumbering yourself with legal rights and responsibilities when you could happily and legally have lived together without them for as long as you wanted, and gone your separate ways without any need for formalities afterwards?

Well I didn't want a throwaway relationship, and the whole ceremony and whatnot came to under a grand :money:. It seemed the right thing to do at the time. Now we've decided that actually, we want different things and we're done... have been for about six months, and never thought to do any costly legal stuff, because it didn't seem worthwhile, and we got on with our lives.

daska wrote: »

should probably point out that the flat isn't yours
a, you wouldn't have got a mortgage in both names without conferring some portion of ownership to him
b, it's an asset of the marriage

Is it an asset of the marriage if it came into our possession before the marriage?

Fire_Fox wrote: »

As it stands the flat is not yours, it's a joint asset and the motgage is a joint liability. You can't just change the names on a mortgage, the lender will only agree if you can pay the full amount yourself and there is enough equity. At under £13K do you have that? There is no benefit to the lender, right now if you get behind on payments there are two people to chase.

I paid 80% equity in cash, and the mortgage is little under £200 a month. I can afford it. I do afford it already, but I take your point, they probably would rather have two people.

Is there really no way you can have relationship counselling and find a mutual path through life as you intended when you had the civil ceremony? Or just split up properly and claim benefits until you can get a lodger to help with the mortgage (tax free income)? Seems to me you are making this more complicated than it needs to be.

Nah, I doubt it. We're very different people now. I'm not trying to make it complicated, just find a relatively simple way to have documented proof that we are separated without going to court to file for a divorce.

Although, I have found that one can do an informal separation, as long as you notify the following people:


your council tax office (England and Wales)
your mortgage lender
water, gas, electricity and telephone companies
your benefits office
your tax office, particularly if you're getting tax credits
your bank or any other financial institution if you have a joint
account. It may be advisable for you to freeze the account to
prevent your partner withdrawing some or all of the money
hire purchase or credit companies
insurance companies, particularly if you have joint policies
your doctor, dentist and child health clinic.

So I guess I could do that, as it seems to be looked at as being separated from a financial standpoint.

fluffnutter wrote: »

Oops. You seem a little naive about civil partnerships/marriage. The flat's not solely yours I'm afraid, and divorcing isn't as simple as changing a facebook status! This is a fairly pointless question and I'm really not trying to berate you... but didn't you appreciate all this before you married??

As for your question, how long have you been separated? It should be easy to divorce if you both wish to split but it might depend on how long you've been apart.

We've been separated for a few months. And yes, perhaps I was somewhat naive. He's said to me that he considers the flat mine, and he doesn't want any of it, so there shouldn't be any form of contest to that point.

Like i said, there's been no animosity, so neither of us have thought of pursuing any paperwork to make it legally official, but seeing as it may prevent me from getting a grant for my degree (which could come out a a few thousand pounds by the end of the course) not to mention I'm being taxed/not eligible for various credits because of his income, it seems wasteful to struggle on individually now we're not splitting some of the bills the way we were.

However, we did take some precautions so we're not too naive. We never had a joint bank account, joint credit cards or anything like that. The only thing with both our names on it is the council tax and the mortgage.

Fire_Fox

You can do an informal separation and that would work fine for most couples. But you are living together indefinitely whilst applying for funding based on the fact that you are separated. Up to you but IMO by doing things the simple way you are muddying the waters and making things more complicated.

If the 80% you put down is yours did you protect that? Do you go for a joint tenancy or for tenants in common with a clearly defined split of equity? If the latter you can get your equity back so the lender may be much more willing to let you take over the mortgage.

daska

vyle wrote: »

Is it an asset of the marriage if it came into our possession before the marriage?

My point was that it's highly unlikely that the flat is legally your personal property. Even if you weren't married, mortgage lenders generally won't lend to a person who doesn't own a stake the property they're mortgaging - therefore you must have put the property in joint names - therefore your husband is probably a joint owner.

I'm glad he feels it's yours and he should sign it over. Is he financially secure? If he needs to claim any means tested benefits once he moves out it's possible he may be considered to have given away money which is rightfully his - deprivation of capital.

sassyblue

vyle wrote: »

Okay, I must admit I'm doubly confused now... I can apply for a divorce or a legal separation. Both cost £340...that's crazy money.

It's nothing. You spent 3 times that much in choosing to get married now you're choosing to undo the legalities.

£340 for that is cheap!

vyle

sassyblue wrote: »

It's nothing. You spent 3 times that much in choosing to get married now you're choosing to undo the legalities.

£340 for that is cheap!

But....but...I got cake as part of the marriage... divorce doesn't come with cake .

I guess I could save up for it, because It'd probably be worth it in the long run.

WelshWoofer wrote: »

I was in a similar position with my husband and we divorced without legal help using the forms you can download - cost us £340 but I didn't consider asking for the fees to be waived as we both have fairly well paid jobs.
The house was mine (from before the marriage) and as long as you both agree you can write on the forms that a satisfactory financial agreement has been reached between both parties and do NOT have to include any details. When you divorce your partner you do have to give a reason though - mine was unreasonable behaviour which my exhusband agreed to in order to speed things through.
Your partner will see everything you write on the form as he'll get a copy and will have to sign a form agreeing to what you have written, so if you can agree what to put first there should be no dispute from the court. I didn't have to attend court, have a solicitor or do anything more complicated than fill in a couple of basic forms. Very quick and straightforward.

Thanks that's a really informative post. I think you posted it while I was typing my last one. At least I know the process better now.

vyle

daska wrote: »

My point was that it's highly unlikely that the flat is legally your personal property. Even if you weren't married, mortgage lenders generally won't lend to a person who doesn't own a stake the property they're mortgaging - therefore you must have put the property in joint names - therefore your husband is probably a joint owner.

I'm glad he feels it's yours and he should sign it over. Is he financially secure? If he needs to claim any means tested benefits once he moves out it's possible he may be considered to have given away money which is rightfully his - deprivation of capital.

That is true, good point.

He is very financially secure, yeah. He won't be moving out though, we're happy enough to live under the same roof, because we still get along as friends, and it makes no sense for either of us to move, especially after we've redecorated our respective rooms and moved the furniture about.

redpete

vyle wrote: »

why can't it be as simple as changing a facebook status *sigh*

Because you chose to legally formalise a long-term relationship and acknowledge a commitment to each other and to the relationship. If you had chosen to leave it as a facebook "in a relationship" status then it would have been as easy to undo it..

Dunroamin

vyle wrote: »

It asks for my partner's earnings. We're now just flatmates, pay our own bills etc, just happen to share the same roof.


.

You aren't just flatmates at the moment, you're still in a civil partnership.