old feelings stirring?

thoughtfulstate

Sorry this is anon, for obvious reasons.

My ex boyfriend got married recently someone I was with for a few years and my first love. I ended the relationship after finding out about several incidents involving other women, however we were very young. We were together from teens and moved out for the first time together.

I am married and happy with children, however I find myself feeling weird about him marrying. I don't understand the feelings, it isn't a feeling of regret, It is more a reflective feeling if you get me? Thinking of how much has changed and evaluating my own life.

I just feel very weird about it all, and have even been dreaming about it. I find it weird for all this to resurface after so many years.

Any thoughts?

raven83

thoughtfulstate wrote: »

Sorry this is anon, for obvious reasons.

My ex boyfriend got married recently someone I was with for a few years and my first love. I ended the relationship after finding out about several incidents involving other women, however we were very young. We were together from teens and moved out for the first time together.

I am married and happy with children, however I find myself feeling weird about him marrying. I don't understand the feelings, it isn't a feeling of regret, It is more a reflective feeling if you get me? Thinking of how much has changed and evaluating my own life.

I just feel very weird about it all, and have even been dreaming about it. I find it weird for all this to resurface after so many years.

Any thoughts?

It is perfectly normal the way you are feeling. They was a big part of your life and now they are going to be getting married it is bound to make you think about things and think about your own life. It doesn't mean you are a secretly still holding a torch for them, but such things are thought provoking.

Melonade

raven83 wrote: »

It is perfectly normal the way you are feeling. They was a big part of your life and now they are going to be getting married it is bound to make you think about things and think about your own life. It doesn't mean you are a secretly still holding a torch for them, but such things are thought provoking.

I agree with the above.

I was with an ex in a similar situation to yours apart from we didn't get round to living together. We split because he couldn't behave himself round other girls and I found out a few times he'd been unfaithful.

We split up (3rd time) and I knew I'd never go back to him. I met my OH and we have been together for nearly 18 years with a lovely son.

I recently heard the ex had married which gave me some strange feelings about him Not sure why but it felt wierd!!

Anyway I'm really, really happy and have the most amazing relationship with my OH (went through a wierd rocky patch last month, talking sorted it out) and wouldn't want to be anywere else. The strange feeling about the ex marrying has gone now.

It's part of your life that you spent with them and a strange feeling about them being with someone else (i think it was in my case anyway)

Not much help am I? Just wanted you to know I have been through the same so it's probably normal lol

themull1

I've had that, i felt really unsettled, even though i wasnt bothered about him meeting someone else.

Mortgage_Reduction_Novice

Your feelings will pass. Don't dwell on it and don't read too much into the dreams.

marisco_2

I must be really odd because the only thoughts and feelings I had about my ex re-marrying were 'bloody good luck to the new Mrs
XXXX you are gonna need it'

There are usually good reasons why people are in our past and dont feature in the present or future. Next time you feel unsettled remind youself why it didn't work and be thankful for what you have now

System

Youve probably stired up feelings of 'what if.....?'

All perfectly normal unfortunately.