Colleague Issues

indie63

There is an issue at work currently whereby I am put in a position to have to communicate with a colleague who speaks to me with no respect, very aggresive with their tone & body language and i find this very intimidating as I feel that i cannot stand up for myself. My line manager has been aware of this issue for a number of months and now has decided to take action and tried to resolve the issue and this backfired. I have tried to be the bigger person and put the issue aside and get on with the job but now its has got worse and have been totally ignored and the communication which is required in my role has stopped which is effecting the performance of my role. The communciation has stopped on their behalf and the only communication is coming via 3rd parties which is making the issue more apparent and drawing attention to it. When my line manager tried to resolve the issue I was more than willing to speak openly and get everything out in the open to deal with it however the colleauge wouldn't discuss anything and chose to leave the meeting Any help or advice would be greatly appreaciated. Thanks

Sambucus_Nigra

Follow everything up with an email.

Ask your manager what they expect you to do when this person won't acknowledge you.

Yorkie1

Do you have a grievance policy at work? Or a bullying one?

Deliberate exclusion of someone can constitute bullying.

indie63

Yes there is a policy, but our line manager has openly admitted he does not know how to fix it as he at times cannot handle this person.

Also this person worked here before and left for another position, he returned here about 5 months ago, at a meeting we all had then before he started, everyone that worked with him before said that i wouldn't get on with him because of his manner ! so his reputation to a certain extent goes before him.

Thanks for the replies so far..

Sambucus_Nigra

indie63 wrote: »

Yes there is a policy, but our line manager has openly admitted he does not know how to fix it as he at times cannot handle this person.

Also this person worked here before and left for another position, he returned here about 5 months ago, at a meeting we all had then before he started, everyone that worked with him before said that i wouldn't get on with him because of his manner ! so his reputation to a certain extent goes before him.

Thanks for the replies so far..

Why the heck did he employ him again then? Goodness me, some managers are wusses. It's their problem to deal with not yours.

Document everything and follow up with emails.

Any issues, any at all - pass it back up the line. That's what your manager is paid to do so don't get involved, don't rise to any baiting - just calmly note it down and pass it up the line.

If you all do that, in the same manner and in unison then the management will have to deal with it at some point.

How does your manager want you to deal with and approach this person? Have you sat down and worked out a strategy, after all he was brought back for a reason?

indie63

He was employed again because there was a vacancy at the time and he is reasonably good at his job.
As i said previously, i was perfectly willing to sit down with my colleague and my manager a couple of days ago, but when we were called in to try and resolve it and i told him how dealing with him was making me feel, he got up walked out of the office and out of the workplace !!

ILW

What has this person actually done wrong?
The fact that you do not like their tone of voice or body language is surely just a matter of opinion.

Sambucus_Nigra

indie63 wrote: »

He was employed again because there was a vacancy at the time and he is reasonably good at his job.
As i said previously, i was perfectly willing to sit down with my colleague and my manager a couple of days ago, but when we were called in to try and resolve it and i told him how dealing with him was making me feel, he got up walked out of the office and out of the workplace !!

What sort of things does he actually do? Give us 3 examples so that we have a measure and can maybe assist in dealing with them there and then.

indie63

ILW your reply is quite puzzling, if you read my initial post regarding the situation its about the manner and tone of this person. Are you trying to imply that respect and civility go out the window when speaking to someone either in or out of the workplace ?

I would bet my bungalow that you would not accept being spoken to as if you were something picked off the sole of a shoe by a colleague or another.

ILW

indie63 wrote: »

ILW your reply is quite puzzling, if you read my initial post regarding the situation its about the manner and tone of this person. Are you trying to imply that respect and civility go out the window when speaking to someone either in or out of the workplace ?

I would bet my bungalow that you would not accept being spoken to as if you were something picked off the sole of a shoe by a colleague or another.

Unless you can actually define in what way you find the persons behaviour unnacceptable, there is very little that management or anyone else can do.

For example, in what way has this person demonstrated disrespect to you?

Sambucus_Nigra

ILW wrote: »

Unless you can actually define in what way you find the persons behaviour unnacceptable, there is very little that management or anyone else can do.

I totally agree. You need to be able to define exactly what he does in order for people to monitor it and for you to be able to document it for when you take it through an official grievance process.