Any ideas where to go from here?

Itsme_3

This is not my usual user name but I could do with some help please.

I am buying a house with my husband but I feel that our relationship is over.
(please don't say marriage councelling I know its time for me to get out)

If I put the house up for sale I can not afford to buy on my own so should I rent a small flat just for me and bank the equity.I don't want to rent forever but maybe a short term answer.

Or should I use my equity as a deposit to buy a house with my son and his girlfriend. I would of course get a legal agreement drawn up covering my money but I'm worried that their relationship might not last and I could be in a financial mess. Or should I buy with just my son and his girlfriend could maybe live with us and pay rent.

Any advise would be greatfully recieved as this has been going round in my head for weeks and I can't find an answer.

Guy_Montag

Sounds to me like you should sell up and rent for while - let things settle & then decide what to do. One major life changing step at a time.

silvercar

I am buying a house with my husband but I feel that our relationship is over.

Key sentence.

Don't do it!

terrierlady

please take your time the grass always looks greener on the other side, the problem maybe able to be sorted or maybe not only you can know the truth of what goes on behind closed door, good luck for the future.

back2square1

I would strongly advise you go and speak to a solicitor free half hour session or go to CAB regarding the share of equity between your husband (ex) and yourself. They can give you a realistic picture of how long the process can take, the costs involved, etc. Remember if you do see a solicitor FOR ADVICE you are not obliged to commit to any future appointments or to employ them.

In my own recent experience the time process really is down to how amicable you and your husband are in agreeing on a financial settlement. My husband and I argued about it for a long time even though we did promise when we first split up that we would definitely be amicable with each other. Please remember this is only my experience and your experience could be entirely different.

With regards to moving to flat, buying house with son and girlfriend or just son and girlfriend paying rent I would say the latter is probably best option.

doitmyself

back2square1 wrote: »

I would strongly advise you go and speak to a solicitor free half hour session or go to CAB regarding the share of equity between your husband (ex) and yourself. They can give you a realistic picture of how long the process can take, the costs involved, etc. Remember if you do see a solicitor FOR ADVICE you are not obliged to commit to any future appointments or to employ them.

In my own recent experience the time process really is down to how amicable you and your husband are in agreeing on a financial settlement. My husband and I argued about it for a long time even though we did promise when we first split up that we would definitely be amicable with each other. Please remember this is only my experience and your experience could be entirely different.

With regards to moving to flat, buying house with son and girlfriend or just son and girlfriend paying rent I would say the latter is probably best option.

It's funny how people often impose their own situations on others. This woman's already stated she's buying with her husband, and he possibly doesn't even realise there's a problem although it's clearly not gonna work from what she says.
To the OP, don't get too hung up on the 'must be a homeowner' thing, it's not the be all and end all, and it's not particularly practical (or desirable?) to buy a home with your son is it, and less so with his maybe/maybe not gf.
I don't now, maybe you're completely dispassionate about disposing of your OH but I'd think that's enough to be dealing with for now..