Very nervous car driver

Southernman

Now thank you some of you for the helpful advise.

Just to reiterate, at this moment in time i do not need a car. I walk to work and catch the train for longer journeys as it's quicker and less expensive.

The reason i don't want to lose touch with my driving is firstly the cost to actually pass, secondly this is exactly what happened to my mum and she regrets it to this day and thirdly my circumstances may well be different in the future. I may need to drive to work or have little babies/children i need to take to ballet/school/discos.

Now i would have joined City Car Club as soon as i passed my test to keep in regular touch with driving even if in short bursts for Aldi shopping etc but for some stupid reason you have to have a licence for a year by which time i probably would have been a huge hazard to everyone around me.

My OH added me to his this weekend because his insurance was renewed and turns out it cost zero to add me on which i was surprised about.

I don't think i'm unfit for the road, just a bit out of practice and was hoping for a bit of encouragement. As my OH lives in a different City to me the roads are a lot different to Manchester so i would prefer to drive out of my comfort zone.

Southernman

cyclonebri1 wrote: »

Bet that's helped:A:A:A, some folks simply want to criticise, I give up on this thread

Some people just don't understand some people grasp things at different speeds to others

hazellc

I agree with others. The best thing to do is just get your confidence with physical driving, so take your OH's car out on Saturday mornings (early summer mornings are lovely for driving!) and weekday nights to get a few successful journeys under your belt. I had a horrible experience very soon after driving my test and it made me very anxious for two or three years. I've had my license for six years and it's only now I'll even consider driving in similar conditions to the journey that scared me so much.

Are there any situations in particular that scare you more than others, like turning right on a busy road or approaching a big dual carriageway interchange or merging at rush hour? It can be very helpful to be a passenger while other people deliberately get into these situations, so you can start to build up a set of learned responses to them.

Good luck! You're wise to try and get some confidence back now, while you don't need to drive.

Joe_Horner

Southernman wrote: »

As my OH lives in a different City to me the roads are a lot different to Manchester so i would prefer to drive out of my comfort zone.

Bloody hell - if you're in Manchester it's no wonder you feel a little nervous as a new driver!

Try the A6 / A623 out towards Chatswell Park then the A619 back to the A6 at Bakewell. Nice scenery and nice road once you get past Stockport

Maybe get your OP to drive out past Stockport then swap. Don't do what I did to my OH while she was learning - drive her to the middle of Stockport then swap so she was behind the wheel :rotfl: Was quite a way into teaching her by then though

Southernman

Haha!

I'm going to spend some time driving around Lancaster which is the other city i'm based at. There's a lot of country roads there and it's not quite so manic!

Manchester is scary, especially around some major roundabouts during rush hour which when learning knocked me sick.

I'd like to focus on country roads because they're bendy and mean i really do have to concentrate on my drifting, otherwise i'd end up in a hedge! There are no kerbs for guidance either.

jackyann

I too, was a nervous driver, and am still very cautious. I am careful what I listen to in the car so I don't get distracted!
I agree that it is best to get out at a quiet time, sometimes best to have someone with you, others, maybe on your own!
I was given this tip years ago, which I find helpful: describe what you are doing, giving a commentary on your driving (is that past of the test these days?) I find it really helps to focus my mind, and makes me feel OK that I have spotted the speed limit sign coming up, the child at the side of the road, the driver about to turn R etc.etc.

wba31

Southernman wrote: »

Haha!

I'm going to spend some time driving around Lancaster which is the other city i'm based at. There's a lot of country roads there and it's not quite so manic!

Manchester is scary, especially around some major roundabouts during rush hour which when learning knocked me sick.

I'd like to focus on country roads because they're bendy and mean i really do have to concentrate on my drifting, otherwise i'd end up in a hedge! There are no kerbs for guidance either.

I have been driving for 8 years, and would consider myself a confident driver, and often drive in and around the centre of Birmingham, and I hate driving in Manchester, it's just crazy!

I think if you're in not great rush to get confident, as other posters have said, just do a little bit her and there and it will come back to you. My wife is a nervous driver, so when i'm with her and she gets stressed i just suggest she slows down, sits back and relaxes a bit more...

cyclonebri1

2nd Manchester driving, it's the 1 place in the country I try to avoid at all costs, excluding London of course.

Some of the slips on and off that orbital MW in the Salford area are horrendous.

pinkteapot

My husband never used to like driving, and he didn't drive for about 7 years after passing his test.

When he started again, he took some lessons as a refresher and was very nervous when first out on the road. He's now been driving regularly for about 3 years and is more confident than me. You do need to keep practising. I would agree with the others - have some more lessons and keep practising at the same time in your car in quiet areas, car parks (quiet ones!), etc. Don't even think about a motorway at this stage.

You need to build up your confidence. It will come. Do you think there's a reason for it? My mother-in-law is very nervous around cars. Her brother was run over several decades ago and still has medical problems as a result. In addition, she herself was a passenger in an accident about 20 years ago. She's always talking about how dangerous cars are and is a very nervous passenger. I suspect that hubby's initial fear was a result of growing up with that.

hartleysjam

Hi there,

My Mum was terrifed of driving, She had vallium before her test and passed (first time by the way) in a manual, then drove and automatic but was pratically chewing the steering wheel when driving so got the bus to work.
I was absolutely terrified that I would be the same and that put me off driving for a few years.

But to be honest, Don't get me wrong I'm a little nervous on motorways so I just don't bother because I worry I would be dangerous to others but I drive nothing like my Mum I'm relaxed and no where near as nevous as I thought I'd be, I passed first time as well.

Try to get out of the state of mind that you'll be nervous like your own mum, You're a completely different person, The fact that you doubt you should have passed your test as affected your ability to have confidence in yourself. If your examiner truly thought you were a massive danger theres no way she'd have passed you let alone your instructor put you in for your test!! Sure, I still make mistakes as EVERY driver does.

As others have said, pick a quiet time and drive the roads you know and then drift a little futher a field as you are comfortable.
I wish you all the luck and remember you wouldn't have passed if you were as bad as you thing