Help - Depressed 11 year old boy

podperson

I agree the GP may be an option, but speak to your son first - he may feel embarassed or uncomfortable having to discuss things like that with a stranger and if he really isn't on board with going then it may do more harm then good.
Have you tried talking to him about getting a new hobby (preferably when he isn't in the 'I'm soooo bored' mood as everything has a tendency to be shot down then ). When my brother was around that age he would go out with his friends a lot, but would be equally happy in on his own - he was into comics/graphic novels and when he ran out of the new ones would try making up his own stories for them, also the Warhammer game where you paint the little figures kept him occupied for hours. Does he like making things - could maybe look at models or something along those lines. Could his dad (or you, don't want to be sexist!) get him to help out with some simple DIY projects, keeps him occupied and also gives him a life skill.

Spendless

The 12 rating is 12A when the film is shown at the pictures. As in an under 12 can watch as long as they are with an adult. When the same film goes onto dvd it becomes a 12. This is so someone under that age cannot buy it without an adult eg it is to make it in-line with the film being shown at the cinema. You know your own child. Please don't think you need to go thru all your 12 dvds and ban your 11 year from watching them till his next birthday.

Is he yr 6 or yr 7? Would he do a group activity if you told him to arrange one, eg go ice-skating with a group of friends and you can arrange to drop off/pick up.

Poppy9

Have you suggested he learn to play a musical instrument like guitar or drums or take up a martial art.

I would take thoughts of suicide seriously. I would ask him when he's not feeling stressed etc. to talk to you about such thoughts. It's perfectly natural to think about dying but you need to find out how seriously he has thought about it.

However well handled children will find the breakup of their parents relationship unsettling and he maybe worried about the parent that left home being lonely or that someone new will come in so it's not surprising that he's down.

Yorkie1

If he's 11, is he about to change schools? Could he be worried about that?

Torry_Quine

I think is something that should be taken seriously. It may be nothing but I think a visit to your GP would be a good idea.

tiff

Is he addicted to the xbox, so that when he doesnt have it or isnt allowed on it, he doesnt know what else to do?

evespikey

Exercise! I'm surprised this hasn't been brought up yet. I had depression as a teen and exercise was (and is) a brilliant way of preventing or lessening the effects of depression.

I also think it would be brilliant if he could spend more time with his dad and have regular emotional connection with him. For example, it's not enough for his dad to tell him that he loves him the next time he sees him; the emotional support needs to be sustained and regular, or it will feel like an empty gesture.

How about combing the two? His dad doing physical exercise with him. If he's not a football type person, there's bike rides, swimming, walking the dog...and more exercise would give him less 'screen time' too.

Maureen43

He is allowed an hour a day on his laptop, plus half an hour each on TV and xbox.

He certainly isn't a screen addict - although he would be if I let him....

tyllwyd

Maureen43 wrote: »

He is allowed an hour a day on his laptop, plus half an hour each on TV and xbox.

He certainly isn't a screen addict - although he would be if I let him....

Well, it's totally your decision as a parent, but I know if I restricted my teenager to a maximum of one hour laptop and one hour tv/xbox she would be doing some serious moping around the house moaning about how bored she is. (And she does have lots of other hobbies like art / guitar / singing / petting next door's rabbits.) He probably feels very hard done by in comparison with his friends, and finds he hasn't got much to talk about them if they are talking about tv programmes or xbox games the whole time.

cte1111

I felt very similarly to your son when I was his age. I still suffer from depression as an adult but not so much from the crippling boredom.

Something that helped me a lot to keep occupied was reading - I could get through a book a day. The library arranged for me to have extra tickets and to be able to take out adult books, so that kept me busy some of the time.

I wish someone had taken my depression seriously when I was a child, perhaps it would have been treated then meaning it being less of a disability as an adult. I do think you should talk to your doctor and maybe the school nurse too.

Is your son on a gifted and talented program at school? At my kids' primary school they have a G&T program that means children like your son are given the opportunity to be involved in other activities (recently they took part is something at the secondary school) to ensure that their needs are addressed too.

Another idea - chess. If your son hasn't already learnt chess then I think that would be a great idea. He might well also find that he meets other children with a similar aptitude to himself which should help him feel better in himself.