Think OH and i will split : what happens with house

moneypuddle

OH and I bought a house together in may 2011. We're really not getting and I pretty much think a split is on the cards. We just rub each other up the wrong way and I think we would be better off apart.

I put a £30k deposit into the house (money I had made on the sale of my previous house which I spent a year rennovating) and he put in approx £1.5k.We privately signed a declaration of trust each with a witness that states that should we split and sell the house, I would get the first £30k of any money made. I have this declaration of trust. It was never given to a solicitor.

We each pay 50% of everything, including the mortgage.

My question: he's just said the declaration of trust means nothing. Is this the case? Do I stand to lose everything? I'm 6 months pregnant so not thinking clearly and could really do with some advice please

amyloofoo

Firstly, I can understand how upset and stressed you must be feeling to be facing all this whilst also being pregnant. It must be very hard at the moment to think things through completely logically and impartially, so please forgive me asking the following question: do you think a split is really likely, or are there stresses at the moment due to pregnancy, financial worries, etc that could be sorted with some help, i.e. relationship counselling?

If a split really is on the cards then you need to seek legal advice as soon as possible. I'm really not sure where the law would stand on the declaration of trust; it might not give you a concrete 'win' in terms of any future legal disputes, but I doubt it 'means nothing' as it's something he's voluntarily entered into and you've acted on that basis.

As I've said though, seek legal advice as I suspect there's very little concrete information that can be given over a forum on your specific circumstances.

newbutold

moneypuddle wrote: »

I put a £30k deposit into the house (money I had made on the sale of my previous house which I spent a year rennovating) and he put in approx £1.5k.We privately signed a declaration of trust each with a witness that states that should we split and sell the house, I would get the first £30k of any money made. I have this declaration of trust. It was never given to a solicitor.

We each pay 50% of everything, including the mortgage.

My question: he's just said the declaration of trust means nothing. Is this the case? Do I stand to lose everything? I'm 6 months pregnant so not thinking clearly and could really do with some advice please

I cannot answer your question really, other than from similar threads I have read previously I think your partner is wrong. please seek proper advice.

Firstly though, please, please lodge the declaration with a solicitor, even if it's just for safe keeping. You don't want to find it goes missing.

ikkle87

Hun are you sure this is on the cards and not just hormones and stress etc. I could happily kill Ant some days but I know a lot of it is hormones and me being ill and him not understanding then winding me up. Hope your ok xx

dizsiebubba

Moneypuddle - some days I want to kill my OH and even threatened to leave him at the weekend (and I thought I was being serious!) even though he really is perfect and an amazing man... I think you need wait a bit longer and see how your hormones settle down xxx

DVardysShadow

dizsiebubba wrote: »

Moneypuddle - some days I want to kill my OH and even threatened to leave him at the weekend

Just kill him. It avoids an embarrassing climbdown afterwards.

moneypuddle

Sorry for not replying last night. I wrote my original post in bed, then I must have dropped off. Welll…. I think its partly hormonally fuelled yes, but we’re just not getting along and because we’re both quite fiery we end up shouting and screaming at each other. Neither of us will back down. I definitely do not want to be a single parent at all, but also don’t want a baby brought up around shouting and upset. I also couldn’t afford to live here by myself (mortgage is £820/month), so would have to sell if we split. I just want to know I would then have my £30k to put down on another place for myself and baby.

If he stopped paying his half of the mortgage where do I stand? Would they pursue him for his half, or me for his half?

Horrible situation!

BitterAndTwisted

If the mortgage is in joint-names then there is no such things as "my half" or "his half" of the mortgage-liability: you are both equally liable. Mortgage-lenders often chase the party who is most easily found.

What is the reason you drew up and signed this Deed of Trust but never had it notarised by a solicitor? I fear you may be at risk of discovering that it's invalid and your £30k investment may have to be shared with your OH on sale.

Seek legal advice immediately!

Pee

You need to see a solicitor and fast to work out what your options are so that you can decide what to do for the best.

You obviously need to think long and hard about whether it really would be best to split with the father of your child and it might be worth considering options such as relate.

(It won't be invalid just because it was done without a solicitor, but if your OH didn't have the chance to take legal advice or it is badly drafted or if there isn't £30,000 equity left in the house...)