7 Month Old Refusing To Nap/Go To Bed

eyelinerprincess

Had a bit of a nightmare the past week or so in that DS won't nap to the point he gets exhausted and frustrated at this.

When he starts to show signs of getting tired, he gets put in his cot where he will scream, roll onto his front (and scream about this), cry, shout on "dada" or "muh", moan and generally do everything except sleep.

He's slept in his cot for around three or four months now, as he wouldn't entertain the thought of his crib and prefers to stretch out rather than be confined. Since he's been in his cot, he's been fine until last week.

We've tried controlled crying but TBH I can't face it at times, and it's all I can do to stop myself taking him out.

He does go to sleep most of the time, but sometimes after half an hour or more of fussing. Last night I found myself telling him off and it seemed to do something as he was silent a few moments later, but I can't keep shouting at him to make him go down.

Help?

hngrymummy

We had a similar problem with our son. The only way we could get him to spend any time asleep in his cot was to make sure he was asleep before he went in. If he woke up he would start screaming straight away. After many months of trying to get him to settle we decided to put him in a bed. Now he goes to sleep with no crying, and when he wakes up he doesn't start wailing. We do have to be very strict with him about staying in bed through.

Our son just hated his cot, and it got worse and worse until we couldn't even carry him near it. He'd start crying and clinging on, just in case we were about to put him in it.

A friend of mine put her son on a mattress on the floor from about 6 months due to similar problems. She thought that a bed at that age was just a little bit too high off the ground.

I hope you find a solution, as I know it's very wearing.

meritaten

first of all - shouting at him wont help.
Perhaps you should just put him down, give him his cuddly, blankie or whatever and LEAVE the room.
ignore him, hoover or put the tv/radio on. don't go creeping back and listen - I swear they can sense you there and will play up even more!

try not to get tense at nap time! easier said than done but if YOU are tense baby will pick up on that. try to be calm and relaxed and put baby down with soft words and reassurance that you are right downstairs.
PERSEVERE! it may take a few days, weeks or longer - but baby will get back into the routine! please try to resist taking baby out of the cot before naptime is ended.

I do have to say that 7 months is when a baby is taking more interest in the 'things around them'..........could he think he is missing out by being put to bed? my youngest grandson always happily napped in his pushchair (I used to take him for a stroll after his lunch) but would wake immediately on being placed upstairs in his cot if the weather was too bad for our outing!

kezlou

This may seem harsh, but when both of my children got to this stage, we just kept them awake without a nap.

Its hard but once you keep them amused they go past the tired stage and then want to go to sleep themselves by 6pm and slept straight through till 6am the next day.

I'm warning you though it is hard, they will scream, shout and play you up something chronic simply because they are tired. But to me it sounds like your son is ready to stay awake for longer.


Meritaten's advice is great, i agree kids do a sixth sense and know when your listening in!

ClareEmily

My 21 month old still definitely needs one 2 hour nap a day and normally we put him down after he has had his lunch so he has a full tummy.

Look for the early signs of tiredness, rubbing of eyes, holding of hair, sucking fingers or thumbs.

At 7 months to be honest he probably sat on my lap and dozed on me then I put into his cot, making sure his room was quite dark, and he was covered with a blanket and had a favourite toy with him.

At bedtime make sure you follow the same routine, we do, dinner, milk, teeth, into pjs, quiet play, watch "In the Night Garden" and sing to the bedtime song, then into sleeping bag and take to his cot with his toy buses, I then ask him to put his buses to the side of him and to put his thumb in, then I leave the room. Normally he goes straight down, but if not I give him a cuddle and try again, I never leave him to cry.

emsywoo123

ClareEmily wrote: »

My 21 month old still definitely needs one 2 hour nap a day and normally we put him down after he has had his lunch so he has a full tummy.

Look for the early signs of tiredness, rubbing of eyes, holding of hair, sucking fingers or thumbs.

At 7 months to be honest he probably sat on my lap and dozed on me then I put into his cot, making sure his room was quite dark, and he was covered with a blanket and had a favourite toy with him.

At bedtime make sure you follow the same routine, we do, dinner, milk, teeth, into pjs, quiet play, watch "In the Night Garden" and sing to the bedtime song, then into sleeping bag and take to his cot with his toy buses, I then ask him to put his buses to the side of him and to put his thumb in, then I leave the room. Normally he goes straight down, but if not I give him a cuddle and try again, I never leave him to cry.

Good to know you have an identical routine to me and my DS (19 months) (minus buses) so you can step in and babysit :rotfl:

ClareEmily

emsywoo123 wrote: »

Good to know you have an identical routine to me and my DS (19 months) (minus buses) so you can step in and babysit :rotfl:

lol hey and vice versa, wish he would get attached to a nice cuddly teddy, buses aren't much fun if they get laid on, I have a strange child.

SqueekyMouse

The only way I could get my DD to sleep until she was 9 months was to feed her to sleep and then I had no chance of putting her down without her waking up screaming, so she napped on me. It was not ideal but I got some lovely cuddles! Since then we've started putting her in her cot awake after her feed and we do pick-up-put-down. It's worked brilliantly for us. The first day it took 1h 30min, the second day it took 30 min... but now I just pop her in her cot and lay down on the floor so she can see me. She goes to sleep within a couple of minutes.

Personally I don't like leaving a baby to cry it out.

At your LO's age, he might be going through separation anxiety, and have just realised that when he goes in his cot, you go away - so maybe just stay with him taking gently to him and maintain physical contact with him untill he goes to sleep. It might take some time, but stay calm and be patient with him. I think the most important thing is to be consistent, they can smell weakness. Once you decide it's naptime, don't give in until he's fallen asleep even if it takes you 2 hours to get him to go to sleep and he wakes up after 10 min, he's still learnt what to do, and next time he'll hopefully be slightly more cooperative.

He'll learn what to do at naptime again, it'll just be hard for you until he does

Blue_Monkey

Oh you have my utmost sympathy... DD (6.5 months) has never napped well and I'd say from 3-6 months she only napped in the pram - great for my weightloss as I was walking the streets all day but not so great for my sanity (or the housework). If I tried to get her to nap in the cot it might take 45-60 mins of PU/PD, patting, singing etc just to get a 25 minute nap out of her..........

The past couple of weeks I've been trying to spend more time at home so she naps more indoors as I figured I was encouraging the pram-naps and unless she had the opportunity to nap at home she wouldn't ever learn to do so.

Anyway................. I don't have any secrets or tips as we're still working on it ourselves (she'll nap upstairs but I have to feed her to sleep and lay with her on our bed, she'll wake and cry as soon as she's put in the cot but that is my aim)... BUT a few things you could look up that have helped me understand a bit more about baby sleep are:

www.babywhispererforums.com
Elizabeth Pantley's books - No Cry Sleep Solution and No Cry Nap Solution
a technique called Gradual Removal

Otherwise, could you try letting him sleep somewhere else for a couple of days/nights and then re-trying the cot? I know this is dangerous ground in terms of him liking the new place and not going back in the cot, but I've found with DD that sometimes having a break from the current way of doing things then going back to it afresh has helped, almost like resetting things IYSWIM.

DD used to cry every time we got half way up the stairs for a nap - it was a though she knew our nap-battle was coming... In the end I made sure we spent a lot of time playing/laughing whilst she was in the cot/in our bedroom (where her cot is) so that she "forgot" the negative association and learnt to like it. Actually, try googling "cot-phobia" too and I think there are some suggestions from the BabyWhisperer on how to tackle this.

Good luck... I'd say that naps have been the one thing I've REALLY struggled with since having DD. I'm still cross with myself/guilty for not "getting it right" still now 6.5 months on. But she did sleep for 2hrs 28mins this afternoon (granted I was laying next to her with my boob out but at least she did sleep which probably means I'm replacing the pram-nap-habit with another bad one and of course I was starving hungry as this was over lunchtime and I didn't dare move off the bed for fear of waking her, but at least she slept!).

floss2

Why not try putting him in his cot before his normal nap time (i.e. while he is relatively happy and not over-tired) with a few toys while you are pottering around him - putting washing away, tidying up, cleaning his bedroom window etc, just so he can see he is not losing you. You can do this at anytime of the day - just as long as he gets used to the cot as somewhere to relax rather than scream & fight.

As he gets more used to it, you can extend the times he is on his own a little at a time but always come back in to him and potter in his room (don't talk to him) and you will find that he will drop off when he is tired because he is relaxed, rather than fighting sleep because he doesn't understand that you are coming back.

We had the same thing with DS2 and this was the advice from my health visitor back in 1988.

sassyblue

Is he hot or is the room hotter than normal as the weather has been stuffy??

I followed baby whisperers advice, two yawns and DS was put in his cot to go to sleep, could be that your DS has altered his pattern so by the time he shows signs of tiredness he's overtired.

It's tricky when the goalposts start moving, and once you've figured this out he'll change something else. :cool:;)