could anyone advise me on what to do please?

frostman

ok, i have a child with a woman im no longer with child is 1yr3months.

ever since her birth its been a nightmare, finding it hard to cope, the childs mother is a bully basically.

We had an agreement where i pay her £30 per week via standing order. we agreed £20 before but she called csa opened a case then £30 was mutaully agreed. now today she calls csa telling me she wants £40 to be put in her account(on the phone she told me thanks for the money i can go shopping now).

she denies access, if i dont pick her up on time or have her on csertain days its always "ill call the csa".

when csa called today they said she could back date up until the child was born, i pay £30 but csa calculate it at £42. I have paid for so many things for the child thats why we agreed £30.

but she keeps pushing and now my friends are suggesting not paying and waiting till csa get in touch.I have no problem paying for my child.

im just a dad who wants to do the right thing, can anyone help me out.like i say i will always pay my way but this woman is trying to control and ruin me.

**so as its stands csa have case open and im now paying £40 a week.**the bloke on the phone was desperate to give her my money, she is on benefits aswell, never worked a day in her life.

cte1111

If you have no other children, then you are likely to be assessed at 15% of your net pay. If this is what you are currently paying, then that's good.

If you are going to stop paying (not sure what the grounds are), then make sure you put aside at least 15% per week / month so you are ready for when they do catch up with you.

If you want to carry on seeing your child, then I would also suggest that you make sure you keep to agreed arrangements for access, e.g. making sure you arrive on time and stick to the days that you have agreed.

They can only backdate child support from when the parent with care started the case, so if your ex started the case whilst you were paying £20 a week, then the CSA might well consider that you owe arrears of £22 a week for the period between the case being opened and now.

Hope that helps. It's not easy parenting with someone that you no longer live with, but if you want to be a genuinely active Dad, then you need to ensure you keep your side of the bargain.

frostman

well the bloke from csa said they would backdate from when the child was born? i dont get it.
i do overtime mabye twice a month aswell, this is the reason the ex wants more money.
i guess i would owe a fair bit of money if it gets backdated to the first claim, but the way this woman acts im just thinking it will be easier as she is not "the boss" as she tells me she is.

so its pay £40 a week and wait untill she wants more money and gets the arears or i have to let csa take controll of the whole situation and pay the correct money without arrears in the future.

PreludeForTimeFeelers

If the case has been set to maintenance direct (where you pay the PWC directly) then the CSA can't backdate the collection to the start of the case, only to when the PWC has asked for the CSA to collect on her behalf. (there may be arrears suspended from the very start of the case however)

PreludeForTimeFeelers

frostman wrote: »

well the bloke from csa said they would backdate from when the child was born? i dont get it.
i do overtime mabye twice a month aswell, this is the reason the ex wants more money.
i guess i would owe a fair bit of money if it gets backdated to the first claim, but the way this woman acts im just thinking it will be easier as she is not "the boss" as she tells me she is.

How much is the actual assessment for?

I think the bloke from the CSA has advised you wrong, to be honest.

frostman

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

If the case has been set to maintenance direct (where you pay the PWC directly) then the CSA can't backdate the collection to the start of the case, only to when the PWC has asked for the CSA to collect on her behalf. (there may be arrears suspended from the very start of the case however)

she opened a case about 5months ago but then closed it down.
the latest one opened today and we have mutually agreed £40.

so today is the only date she can get backdated from?

i get paid 280 after tax so £42 according to csa calulator and £48 according to this csa advisor today.

kevin137

It would be £42 through the CSA on £280 net, and probably a lot less hassle if you just used the CSA, you get into a routine if you pay from the start and there can be no arguments as such if you pay by DEO.

That way it is deducted form tour ages and you can't miss. It will also take the control of the ex away from you, as any delays as long as the DEO works is purely down to the CSA then...

The big problems with the CSA arise if you are evasive to start, rack up arrears, constantly change jobs etc, but if you pay regularly and keep a job a while, there is no reason to really fear them...

The case would run from day of being opened, so if it was opened before but closed with no arrears, then it can only run from today.... Don't be scared of them, ask for everything in writing, and any conversation you have by phone out in writing and send recorded delivery, it gives you a record of everything with proof of receipt.

If a case has been opened, the other thing you must remember is do NOT pay anything else direct by any payment method...!!!

frostman

kevin137 wrote: »

It would be £42 through the CSA on £280 net, and probably a lot less hassle if you just used the CSA, you get into a routine if you pay from the start and there can be no arguments as such if you pay by DEO.

That way it is deducted form tour ages and you can't miss. It will also take the control of the ex away from you, as any delays as long as the DEO works is purely down to the CSA then...

The big problems with the CSA arise if you are evasive to start, rack up arrears, constantly change jobs etc, but if you pay regularly and keep a job a while, there is no reason to really fear them...

The case would run from day of being opened, so if it was opened before but closed with no arrears, then it can only run from today.... Don't be scared of them, ask for everything in writing, and any conversation you have by phone out in writing and send recorded delivery, it gives you a record of everything with proof of receipt.

If a case has been opened, the other thing you must remember is do NOT pay anything else direct by any payment method...!!!

thanks thats very useful. my only concern is i have done overtime say 2/3 times a month which takes wasges up to 350 but its not gauranteed overtime. some months i wont do any. Would i be correct in assuming if i lay off the overtime, get the wage back to 280 for say 6 months, then call csa up and get it all done officailly this will be ok? i am paying her £42 pounds from now and the case opened today.

you say dont pay anything direct? should i not pay her the £42 pounds this week and just let csa get on with it?

PreludeForTimeFeelers

frostman wrote: »

she opened a case about 5months ago but then closed it down.
the latest one opened today and we have mutually agreed £40.

so today is the only date she can get backdated from?

i get paid 280 after tax so £42 according to csa calulator and £48 according to this csa advisor today.

Do you know if the previous case was fully closed, or whether it was just suspended? Could be worth giving them a quick call and asking them to confirm the effective date for the start of the case.

If you've mutually agreed £40, does this mean she's going to withdraw the case again, or will you both just have this one set to 'maintenance direct'?

If you want to pay her directly this week then make sure you do this electronically, and set a reference as 'child maintenance', plus ask her to sign a receipt. The alternative is to pay that money to the Csa, who will then send it to her once the assessment has been carried out.

With regards to overtime, Csa will usually average out your wages from the last two or three months. If there is overtime on one of your Payslips then it will be taken into consideration. Choosing not to do overtime for the purposes of an assessment could be counterproductive, remember that your assessment is only 15% of your income so it isn't as if you have to hand over all the extra overtime cash. Also, it means you're more likely to get her calling for another assessment once you start up the overtime again.

kingfisherblue

Another point to consider - if you are buying things for your child in addition to paying maintenance, you should remember that you don't have to. So when your ex says that the little one needs XYZ, you can point out that the maintenance that you pay can be used.

A good example for this age is shoes. Decent, well fitting shoes are not cheap, and kids grow quickly. You can, if you wish, contribute more for larger expenses or one off items, but you are under no obligation to do so. You already pay through maintenance. It is up to your ex to budget for these things.

As she is on benefits (I am assuming income support as she is classed as a lone parent, and you say she has never worked), she will not be paying rent or council tax. She will receive child benefit, child tax credits and income support, in addition to any maintenance payments.

iluvfreebies

op - a csa case will never ever be backdated to the childs date of birth - this is impossible as no matter how early a claim is made child benefit must be in payment before it can be processed - the e,date of the case will be the date that they advised you of the application - either by phone or the date the forms were issued to you. If the case was assessed through the agency and then set up as payments being made directly the agency would not be contacting you to tell you what you have to pay - are you sure it was someone from the csa that called you? if the pwc is going to mess you around it may be easier to pay your assessed amount through the agency and not pay for any extras as this is what the law says you are legally entitled to pay - of course if you wish in addition to your payments you could perhaps set money aside for their future. i would speak to the csa and confirm that it was them that contacted you - if the pwc is looking the same amount as what would be paid through the agency i would pay through them so she cannot manipulate the payments when she pleases but just make her aware no extras will be bought.