Is money everything?

sweetdaisy

I am in a similar situation so understand how you feel. I am in a job that pays well, been there for a number of years, but the 45-60 mins commute (each way) to work means that my fuel costs are rising and I don't get to spend as much time with the children before they go to bed as I would like .

The working environment is also challenging, our youngest Son has just been diagnosed with a genetic disorder (luckily it's not life threatening), however it has put everything into perspective and I don't want to be in a job which has added stress and I just want to be in a job that I enjoy and be closer to home, so that I can spend more time with our children.

I have started looking for a new job and having worked out our finances, if I take a job closer to home I can afford to reduce my salary by approx £4,000 a year. As long as we have enough to cover the bills, put some money in savings for emergencies etc then we will manage.

Maz

You can always make more money, in some way. You may be a bit skinter than you're used to but as long as you can manage, so what?

But you can't make more time. When it's gone, it's gone. There is no magical time deposit account that you can dip into to recover your losses.

Dunroamin

Would a compromise solution be to move nearer to your job and lose the long commute? Money isn't everything but you might regret stalling your career if you go backwards at this stage.

Smudger78

sweetdaisy wrote: »

I am in a similar situation so understand how you feel. I am in a job that pays well, been there for a number of years, but the 45-60 mins commute (each way) to work means that my fuel costs are rising and I don't get to spend as much time with the children before they go to bed as I would like .

The working environment is also challenging, our youngest Son has just been diagnosed with a genetic disorder (luckily it's not life threatening), however it has put everything into perspective and I don't want to be in a job which has added stress and I just want to be in a job that I enjoy and be closer to home, so that I can spend more time with our children.

I have started looking for a new job and having worked out our finances, if I take a job closer to home I can afford to reduce my salary by approx £4,000 a year. As long as we have enough to cover the bills, put some money in savings for emergencies etc then we will manage.

Thanks for your reply, it does seem like a similar situation with the exception of your sons condition which I'm really sorry to hear about. In terms of my commute it's 1.5 hour each way so 3 hours a day if there aren't any traffic issues. It basically means every day is 12 hours for me and whilst I can and do work from home on the odd day it doesn't really compensate for not getting home in time to bath my son regularly etc..

Another poster commented that they'd be willing to take upto a 20% cut and that is pretty much what I'd be looking at. It is a lot but the salary I would be on would still be a relatively good one, we'd have enough to pay the bills and I would reduce my travel costs by around £100 p/mth which would slightly lessen the impact. I'd also get to spend more time with my son which as other posters have commented is time you cannot get back..

So I think I know the answer and it's been reassuring to hear everyone's views reflecting my own thoughts.

Thanks everyone!

Smudger78

Dunroamin wrote: »

Would a compromise solution be to move nearer to your job and lose the long commute? Money isn't everything but you might regret stalling your career if you go backwards at this stage.

Hi,

Thanks for the suggestion however I'm afraid that wouldn't work for us as we rely heavily on grandparents who live close by for childcare.

wantsajob

It seems like it when you have none.

sweetdaisy

Smudger78 wrote: »

It basically means every day is 12 hours for me and whilst I can and do work from home on the odd day it doesn't really compensate for not getting home in time to bath my son regularly etc..

I'd also get to spend more time with my son which as other posters have commented is time you cannot get back..

A couple of times last week, DS2 went to bed early as he was tired, so I didn't get a chance to give him a cuddle and his bottle before bed. DS1 who goes to bed a little bit later (he's almost 4 years old) sometimes asks to go to bed early as school tires him out, so when I get home from work I have around 30 mins to bath him, get him ready for bed and read a story. It would be nice just to have some more time with him, so that his bedtime is not rushed.

A few people have said to me that 'they are only young once' and you can't get this time back so enjoy it. So this is what I intend to do. Good luck on hunting for a new job .

princessdon

As 10K is only 20% of salary then I think the answer is pretty clear. Despite what people say about "money isn't everything" to live on the breadline, be unable to enjoy certain activities and to have money worries isn't fun either.

This isn't the case with you so I don't think you have anything to loose.

My OH worked 80 hours a week and never had the phone off his ear - clearly no work life balance. He was made redundant and took a job on same money that was 9-5 close to home. He HATED it, missed the challenge, missed the buzz, missed the thrill of loving work.

I made him leave (yes it was nice having him home everynight but a bit after the stable door closed as the children were older at this point, 4 years prior I'd have made him stay in the job).

We have now compromised as he works away, but works from home a lot and has picked the kids up from school more in the last year than all previous years multipied by 10. The school wouldn't know him this time last year, but he's not quite a regular on the school run, but I'd say 3 out of the 10 runs a week when averaged out.

It's a lot to think of and as I say, my kids are a bit older but if 100% honest when they were pre-school I'd have given my arm and leg for a hand at bedtime.

somethingcorporate

I'd do it in a heartbeat to be with my family. I'd give up my job to spend time with my daughter. To be honest given she is dead I'd give up my arms and legs just to see her one last time.

You only have one family, make the most of them.

Angelicdevil

Definitely not.

I view it from the other way, I could easily earn £20-30k more in my current role if I went to work in London, however, you could not pay me enough to take on that commute!

I love the fact that I will be home in 10 minutes instead of contemplating a 1hr + tube & train rush!