Cost of attending a wedding as a family

YORKSHIRELASS

I asked for help a while ago for ideas on dressing our kids to attend a family wedding. Well the wedding was on Saturday, it was a fantastic day and we all really enjoyed ourselves.

I thought it might be helpful for someone else if I posted how much we spent in the end. Of course we appreciate that the bride and groom spent a fortune on the day and I dont want to sound like I am being mean or stingy! I got some great advice on here before and it really helped.

We ended up dressing the boys quite casually, chinos, shirt and converse type shoes. This worked really well and I actually think they looked really smart. I spent £33 on clothes and shoes for the kids but they will probably wear most of it again. A friend offered to lend us some shirts but in the end it never materialised so I decided to just buy them something new.

Hubby bought a new shirt and tie - £8 from Asda. I just wore clothes I already have.

We spent £20 on the wedding present and £30 on drinks at the reception. Neither of us are big drinkers and wine was provided with the meal.

So that was £91 in total. I really dont think we could have done it for much less and I am quite happy with that. It was a lovely day and worth every penny.

Brighton_belle

:T Well done. So glad you had such an enjoyable day. For what it is worth, I think it is irrelevant how much the bride and groom may have spent on the day. I don't think guests should ever have to spend a penny they can't afford (including presents) on any one else's wedding.

TheConways

Weddings are quite expensive to attend. We have been invited to four this year, and three of them require a flight plus 1-2 nights hotels (that said, we do live abroad in Europe).

I'm wearing the same dress to all of them (all of them will have a different set of friends present).

One key thing that riles me at British weddings: the way UK venues rip everyone off for drinks. A cash bar is normal in the UK generally because venues will not allow the happy couple to supply their own drinks - whereas this is the norm on the continent. Where there is a cash bar in place, the prices are often extortionate - and hence understandably, the guests pay their way as the couple cannot afford a 10k bar bill.

Penny-Pincher!!

Glad you had a lovely day and at least the majority of your purchases will be reused.

puffinmuffin

TheConways wrote: »

One key thing that riles me at British weddings: the way UK venues rip everyone off for drinks. A cash bar is normal in the UK generally because venues will not allow the happy couple to supply their own drinks - whereas this is the norm on the continent. Where there is a cash bar in place, the prices are often extortionate - and hence understandably, the guests pay their way as the couple cannot afford a 10k bar bill.

We have been known to bring our own spirits because of bar prices in hotels. When we got married the bar prices were one of the things we always asked the venues. Many of our guests were already travelling and paying for accommodation. Lots told us how astounded they were at the bargain bar prices!

We only have one wedding this year so i will be wearing a dress from last year and we have booked a travelodge instead of the wedding hotel. i will give a generous gift as it's a good friend.

Nan63

We have often phoned the reception venue (especially if it's in a hotel) to get the wine list and then sourced the wine ourselves and strolled in as bold as brass with a few bottles to the evening reception. I have 2 'wedding' outfits that get recycled with different accessories and my husband has his full kilt outfit we bought years ago and has paid for itself 10 times over now!

We really can't afford to spend any significant amount nowadays but don't want to miss out on sharing these lovely occasions with our family and friends so go with this system. It works for us!

piglet25

I'm going to family wedding in which paying for your own meals is obligatory so theres nearly £100 quid, plus pressie ( they have requested cash ) and new clothes, plus time off work plus any drinks we may consume, alcoholic or soft, plus cost of travel - some people know how to take the p!ss.

Valli

piglet25 wrote: »

I'm going to family wedding in which paying for your own meals is obligatory so theres nearly £100 quid, plus pressie ( they have requested cash ) and new clothes, plus time off work plus any drinks we may consume, alcoholic or soft, plus cost of travel - some people know how to take the p!ss.

Might get flamed for this but if I were arranging a wedding and expecting guests to pay for their own meals I would be requesting NO gifts at all. IMO that's taking the proverbial!

YORKSHIRELASS

Never heard of having to pay for your own food at a wedding, that seems a bit mean. I suppose if you really want to be there you have got to do it.

When my brother got married we spent about £600 on the wedding. That was back in the days when I had my head well and truly in the sand financially. There was a hen night and stag night to go to, travel, accommodation, a wedding present, meals the day before and the day after, drinks, clothes etc. I remember one nights B&B at the wedding hotel was £120 for the four of us. It was one of the best days I have ever had but I had no idea how much it was going to cost!

killerpeaty

For my brother's wedding I think I spent money on some gifts (about £30 some silly gifts for them both) and the train journey back home. I was a bridesmaid so the dress was bought for me (is it acceptable to wear it to someone else's wedding next year?), the accommodation was rented as a family (2 little holiday hut things) and my parents insisted on my not paying for my boyfriend and me which is fair enough as I was a student and most of my money was spent during the year on hospital trips. My drinks (a whole 4 of them) were paid for by the boyfriend as he had pockets and the wedding gifts were from both of us.

However, one of the 4 year olds there was dressed as Dr Who (Smith) and he looked fabulous. It was great, anything he had to get dressed up for and he was Who-ing it up! Weddings, parties, halloween...

piglet25

Thats my point - i dont want to be there They had a christening and said 'oh theres meal after at .....' so back we all went and it had all been ordered and then everyone had to pay, same for birthdays. They want what they cant afford and if it was me I would take close family for a meal and than have a buffet in the evening for the others. I think its just plain rude and it leaves a nasty taste in the mouth as people resent it. Get this then - they took her mother out for a mothers day meal and it was two for one and cos her dad went they told him he had to pay for his meal, so they never paid any for the mother :O but then told everyone they had taken her out for lunch They are dream MSE'rs!