Telling your childs school that you are seperating?

BLUEBIE

Is this something you would do? Kids seem to be coping ok on the whole. Slightly more attached to mummy than normal. Have had the odd day sick because of things though. Its secondary school age so not babies, 12 - 13 years old. Don't know whether to inform them at this stage just so they can keep an eye out for any odd behaviour?

Thanks

BEE

X

whitewing

I would give them a quick call or drop an email to an appropriate person (depending on who you are most comfortable with).

tanith

I agree you need to notify someone , teachers might pick up on subtle changes in your kids that you aren't aware of.. I'm sure the school also appreciate that sort of input from parents just so they are aware of changing circumstances.

GobbledyGook

I would tell them. Even though they seem to be coping well even you are noticing slight changes in their behaviour so that may impact on them at school (or be magnified).

MrsManda

I'd talk to your children before talking to the school to let them know why you think you should tell the school and get their opinion. Allowing them a say gives them a little control over a situation in which they are essentially powerless which could be helpful.

It's not the same situation by any means but I had issues when I was around their age which were out of my control and it was obvious my school needed to be aware. After discussion with my mum I decided that I would feel better talking to the head of year myself. My mum agreed, with the provision that I told the teacher that if she wanted to speak to my mum she could do.

peachyprice

I would tell their form tutors.

thegirlintheattic

Quick e-mail or phone call will do wonders. Not only can we watch out for odd behavior (and be more sympathetic), it avoids awkward situations e.g. Are mum and dad coming to parent's evening?

It's very common for mum or dad to let the school know they are separating. Same as pet/grandparent/neighbor died, dad moving away from work etc.

angelil

^^ It's also a good idea to let them know who the "main contact" will be (if it's not still going to be both parents) and how you would like to be addressed (if either of you are changing your name following the separation). You have no idea how many times as a teacher I have been caught out by addressing an email to "Mr and Mrs X" when it is only Mr or Mrs X at home...simply through never having been informed...only to feel like I have embarrassed myself by not knowing.

lika_86

Agree that if nothing else, the school should know for having contact details for both, also (I don't know) but I imagine that schools may duplicate things that are sent home (eg. reports) if you let them know. They normaally mark that stuff in the register so that letters etc are correct.

mintymoneysaver

I think you probably should, although to be honest I haven't. We separated just before the Easter holidays so they ( 18 and 14) were only in for 2 days after we told them, then had two weeks off. They seem to have taken it so well that I keep forgetting to tell the school!

Mrs.W_2

BLUEBIE wrote: »

Is this something you would do? Kids seem to be coping ok on the whole. Slightly more attached to mummy than normal. Have had the odd day sick because of things though. Its secondary school age so not babies, 12 - 13 years old. Don't know whether to inform them at this stage just so they can keep an eye out for any odd behaviour?

Thanks

BEE

X

If the parent becoming a NRP wishes to receive end of year reports, to be kept up to date on school events etc, then the school will need their new address.

Wishing you all the strength to cope well with this upheaval.