Please help with 15yr old self harming and anxiety attacks

hollyh

I really don't know what to do about my Son. Yesterday i had to pick him up from school at lunch time because he had an anxiety attack and had scratched his arms to shreds. He'd done the same the day before in an exam but not to the same extent. He said the day before was because he didn't know the answers to the questions and panicked that he'd fail. Yesterdays was because he was in drama and they had to do an exercise using only eye contact and he freaked out.

I took him to the Dr's and they weren't very helpful to be honest. He just gave a suggesstion for a book to read and that was that. I went to the chemist and bought something like kalms but suitable for children 12+. We spoke and he said he was worried about it happening again but he'd calmed down and was fine this morning when he went to school.

He came home from school today to tell me he'd done it again. Then he got angry at his 6yr old brother and threw his toy out of the front door then smashed up my sunglasses when i told him off. He did calm down and say sorry after a while. I was supposed to be going out but am scared to leave him.

He's gone upstairs and i've just had a look at his facebook. There were loads of messages to and from friends these last few days. He told loads of people about it and quite a few have said he was faking it. He also put a status up saying about the anxiety attack but also the fact he's on medication. He's also said that he's been hearing voices again he hasn't told me this and people are disbelieving him. I deleted the status because i don't think it's the right place.

I just don't know what to do. He had an attack like this a few months ago when i'd taken something precious off him for punching his brother. He was pacing around the house saying "she's taken it she's going to burn it" and i couldn't talk sense into him at all. It took ages before he calmed down but then it hasn't happened again until now.

nickyhutch

Take him back to his GP (a different one if you have more than one at your surgery) and tell him what you've said on here.

Keep him off Facebook.

hollyh

Thank you yes i will keep him off school tomorrow and take him.

j.e.j.

nickyhutch wrote: »

Keep him off Facebook.

definitely this ^^^^^

You could get the opinion of another doctor or maybe the school has a welfare officer you could confide in? It is hard to know just from reading a post to what extent his behaviour could be attention-seeking, or teenage emotional problems, or a more serious mental health issue (hopefully it's not the latter).

Gingham_R

Your GP should not have dismissed him like that. Mental health issues in children are not taken seriously enough by some professionals.

I think he needs to be seen pretty urgently, by someone who will take it seriously. Do you have another GP that you could go to? You could maybe go without your son so you can explain all the problems without him having to sit through it again.

I'd try to remember all the points you've mentioned:

Severe anxiety
Self harm
Auditory hallucinations
the previous issue you mention
His openness with peers who are not supportive

and anything else that seems different or worrying. And think about if there have been any events that may have caused him problems.

I'd phone MIND too to ask their advice.

Good luck. With the right support, I'm sure he'll be fine.

hollyh

Thanks guys just cooking tea in between posting. There is a different Dr we could see there's plenty there but it's a bit of a lucky dip who you get to see.

POPPYOSCAR

Can not add anything else other than what has already been said i.e. back to GP asap and a word with MIND.

Hopefully, someone who has been through something like this can help you.

It must be very worrying , but the help will be out there for you.

nickyhutch

Insist when you're booking on seeing a different GP. If you can't, or another GP is just as dismissive, take your son to a local A&E/Walk-in-centre/Urgent Care Centre.

hollyh

I'll try and get him in at the other branch of the Dr's nearer our house. I only took him to the other one because it's right next to the school. I'm going to try and get an appointment with the school too they might have some suggestions.

I just feel so helpless and out of my depth. Give me a toddler any day over a teenager!

nickyhutch

Ask school your school nurse's contact details too. She'll be able to see your son and work out if there are any other services she can signpost you to that might be able to help or give you some advice.

SqueekyMouse

I experienced anxiety attacks from the age of 11, and was actually house bound for several months due to anxiety and agoraphobia. I still suffer with generalised anxiety now, but have it much more under control.

This needs treating properly as soon as possible in order for him to make the best possible recovery. I was unable to articulate how I felt as a young teenager and the doctors were very dismisive as well. I believe that the lack of care I recieved allowed things to get worse and it wasn't until I was at uni when I took my medical care into my own hands that my life improved

Defiantly go back to the doctors. If you ask at reception before you make your apt, they will be able to tell you which of their GPs has an interest in mental health.

Medication and talking therapies such as CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) will help - don't just get fobbed off with medication

Try to help your son express how he feels to the health professionals (without putting words in his mouth) because it's difficult to describe

Kalms are placebos, they probably won't help if he has sever symptoms, I believe they also make you drowsy

I agree it would be best for him not to post about this on facebook, but you have to strike a balance with him so he feels able to talk about his condition. One of the biggest hurdles I faced in getting better was embarrassment and feelings of shame because I had a mental health condition. These feelings stremed from my parents denial of what was happening and insisting that my symptoms were due to a physical problem. As a result I hid my condition from friends and didn't talk about it with my parents. The best decision I made when I went to uni was to tell my friends about my issues because it took away the shame and they gave me so much support.

You already sound like you're supporting your son completely, so I hope the last paragraph won't apply to your son, but I just wanted to make sure you understand how damaging the stigma associated with a mental health condition can be