help with my grooms speech please....im terrified!

ianbar0

hello, i am looking to sort my speech but i am incredibly terrified! i don't do speaking in front of people at all! has anyone got any tips of any type what so ever!

SqueekyMouse

Congratulations on your wedding

I hate public speaking too, luckily for me, I was the bride at my wedding so didn't have to!!!!

Don't stress too much, your speaking at your wedding, it's a happy occasion where you're surrounded by friends and family, they won't be judging you. It's not a job interview/huge career altering presentation type thing


But as for practical advice:

Speak from the heart and you can't go far wrong

Don't try to include too many jokes in case they bomb which will make you uncomfortable

Although it's not the traditional way, can you do the speeches before the meal so you have less time to worry before you have to speak, and then can relax and enjoy your meal?

Whenever I had to do any public speaking I would learn my speech by heart and take along notes or the whole thing written in full to jog my mind if I got lost. Often having the security of cue cards was enough, and I didn't need to use them. Although it would look better if you didn't read from a script, if you have to then who cares!

Toast your bride, tell her she's beuatiful and say thank you to her Mum and Dad for raising such a wonderful daughter!

NAR

Start off with "On behalf of my wife and I" (cheesy but goes down well!)

First of all welcome all the guests belatedly to your special day, especially those that have travelled from afar. Thank them all for their wonderful gifts, which you look forward to adorning your home.

Then the following: -

1. Thank parents for having a beautiful daughter;
2. Thank best man for doing a great job, even remembering the wedding rings;
3. Thank bridesmaids for supporting "my wife" on this most special day and congratulate them for looking so beautiful;
4. Thank your bride for making this the most special day in your life and you are looking forward to many more of them.

Ask everyone to stand and toast the bridesmaids for doing a wonderful job (give them their gifts if applicable).

Sit down and feel smug for a job well done!!

Short, simple and to the point is always best for nervous grooms.

ianbar0

thank you for both your advice, u have insisted on doing the speeches before meal...i love my food no way i am wasting that lol i am ring to make it short anyway and stay away from any real jokes, its bound to go wrong! i will call a toast for friends and family who cannot be there but are in sprit etc my mum passed away a few years ago and my gran only a couple of months ago, and my fiancee has people missing too. i think i will have notes with me, yes would look better without having some notes but better to make sure i say it all correctly!

somethingcorporate

Luckily the grooms speech is traditionally quite formulaic and covered realy well in NARs post above.

Do get it out of the way before food, I hardly touched my main course because I was so nervous. If you run out of things to say start crying, it's a great way to bring any speech to an end :P

angelil

My husband's speech was VERY short and sweet last year. He had a post-it note with "thank bride's parents...thank bride"...and that was all!! (Obviously he SAID a bit more than this but it just goes to show you don't need much necessarily.) Seemed to go down fine

meritaten

and dont make the mistake of thanking the barmaids instead of the bridesmaids as the groom did at my daughters wedding!
flustered him so much at the gales of laughter (he hadnt realised he had said it) that he could hardly speak the rest of the speech!

try to relax hun . focus on a friendly face and begin - every time you thank someone look at them! write a short speach and speak slowly and clearly!

eamon

Use the old standby of imagining that the audience are naked. Not many people can ad lib so don't be afraid of having & using short notes. Just be certain that you thank everybody that needs thanking. Short & sweet is best. Leave all the nonsense stuff to the bestman.

room512

My husband wrote his speech in the horse and carriage on the way to the reception! He wrote all of five words and made it up as he went along! I had checked and double checked that he had written it before the day but he obviously didn't tell me the truth. His excuse was he didn't want to read it, he wanted it to be from the heart!

robbiecaratiger

Congratulations Ian !

I got married 7 years ago and I was nervous too

That was.... Until I stumbled upon a great website where previous people submitted their speeches for other worried souls to learn from. Read these and you'll get a flavour maybe for what you want to say?

http://www.hitched.co.uk/speeches/speechhome.aspx

Good Luck

motherofstudents

Short and sweet is good. Thank the guests for coming and sharing your special day. I think mentioning your mum, gran and whoever else is missing is a lovely touch but I would never get it out without crying. But that's ok too, it's your day and the bride's and people will be willing you to do well so try not to worry ! congratualtions to you both and I hope you have a lovely day, and more importantly a wonderful life together.