Sleep deprivation

Nicki

Does anyone have any tips for dealing with this?

DD has epilepsy and has just started to have night time seizures. She had a big one last night about 3 in the morning which lasted a couple of hours from beginning to her calming down and falling back to sleep. She is off school today recovering. I also have a 2 year old at home to look after, and a 12 year old who likes a lot of parental attention until he goes to bed at around 8.30, so I struggle to catch up on missed sleep when this happens and am feeling ratty and a bit stressed.

Mado

Not really, but you can have sympathy.:grouphug:
Try to catch a nap when your 2 year old has one.

It's not easy to function without sleep.

Gigervamp

Mado wrote: »

Try to catch a nap when your 2 year old has one.

This is what I was going to suggest. My youngest slept very little, even when he'd started school he kept waking in the night, didn't go to sleep until midnight and was up early.

I made sure that I always had a nap in the afternoon. I don't think I (or he for that matter!) would have survived if I hadn't!

Nicki

Thanks. Only trouble is that DD won't have a nap with the 2 year old and she needs pretty constant supervision too. She's 10 with severe learning difficulties and no sense of danger.

More strong coffee it is then

Mojisola

Nicki wrote: »

Thanks. Only trouble is that DD won't have a nap with the 2 year old and she needs pretty constant supervision too. She's 10 with severe learning difficulties and no sense of danger.

More strong coffee it is then

In that case I think you've got to call on other people for help. There's a good reason why sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture and, if you look up some of the scientific studies on it, you'll see the effects it has on the body. For instance, someone who is really sleep deprived is a more dangerous driver than someone over the drink/drive limit.

elsien

I can second that - the two times I've driven my car into stationary vehicles have been when I should have been sleeping in at work but had disturbed nights and got very little sleep.
Is there anyone you trust to sit with dd who she'd be happy with (and who's available at short notice) while you and the 2 year old have a quick zizz? Even if it's only an hour or so.

gingin_2

Not moneysaving but when I am not feeling well and am in full charge of the children I go onto amazon and pick up some bits that I know will keep them amused. Books, dvds, craft stuff. At least with that you can put a dvd on and try and snooze on the sofa, whilst they are amused. You can order today and the things will be with you tomorow morning.

kingfisherblue

Sleep deprivation is something that I understand very well! My son has special needs and at 14, still has to be fed orally up to four times a night, every night. He also has breathing problems and severe reflux.

A few suggestions:
* sleep when the two year old sleeps - it may not be possible whilst your daughter is off, but try to do this when she is back at school. Even if you don't sleep, you can rest and this can help when you have another disturbed night
* ask family or friends to help out so you can have a sleep
* ask Social Services for a carer's assessment - you might be able to get Direct Payments for someone to look after your daughter for a few hours a week. If you can, it is possible that the person you employ will also look after your other children. I've done that, and during your 'me time', you can do whatever you want, including sleep or rest
* slow down on other things. Leave the ironing pile or the dusting and just sit down. It isn't worth tiring yourself out more by trying to keep up with housework
* learn some relaxation exercises. Breathe deeply and slowly. Let your mind empty if possible. You can do this whilst the kids are playing - just sit on the settee or go into another room. OK, so it is difficult, but it can be done with practice
* let the kids watch a DVD or do something else that requires minimum input from you. I don't agree with the TV being used as a babysitter, but there are times when you just need a bit of peace - aqnd this sounds like one of those times!
* if you have a husband or partner, get him to take over when he comes in from work whilst you go upstairs to have a peaceful bath or a rest. Yes, he may well be tired as well, but has he been up during the night?

I'm single, but my kids see their dad every Saturday. For the few hours they are with him, I sleep. I sleep deeply, more deeply than overnight, and I think it is because I am not listening out for my son.

shegirl

As above,I'd ask for a Carers Assesment.You may either get Direct Payments or respite provided.We weren't given direct payments as finding anyone to do anything with DS would be very difficult (something I'm looking into now though),especially with him needing 2:1.But he goes to a respite centre every Friday from 3:30 until 10am Saturday morning.It's a god send -he's safe and occupied and I have freedom,peace and can sleep without being stressed,woken and worried.

It's not easy not being able to nap when you're sleep deprived or feeling ill.I tend to give DS a little extra time on his laptop or console so I can have a little bit of peace,although need to keep myself awake so usually end up on here LOL

Is there anyone you can trust to watch DD while you have a sleep?

I guess I'm a little lucky in that I've never slept as much as many people so in that respect it's not so bad for me,if I get emotional though it's a different matter as that just makes me want to sleep:o As long as I have stimulation of some kind I'm ok,it's just hard to have any!

I'd definitely look into having a Carers Assesment done though

Also,if you're interested,apparently there are respite holidays around for both the carers and the kids (I'd only ever heard of one or the other before) which is something I'm looking into -go on holiday together and these places (when I manage to find them!) have experience an qualified workers who'll do activities with the kids while you do something else and relax there.Sounds great!Now I just have to find where on earth they are!!!

cobbingstones

You have my sympathy.

best wishes on getting it sorted and remember to look after YOU