DH IS NOW MY EX what do i do

fizzel81

dh left 13th feb, ongoing problem that just could not be solved, we are in army housing so its not a problem untill 93 days are up, i then have to find the rent untill i get moved back to my area of choice (sevenoaks)

i went to the job centre and filled forms for IS but cannot claim HB as i will be moving to another area, how the heck as im supposed to pay any rent once my 93 days are up and untill i move?

at the moment the only money i have comeing in is my child benifit , ctc was stopped the day i rung them, im waiting for the forms to re submit a claim to them based on me as a single parent, and im going to have to sit and wait for IS to be sorted out

basically help please, im stuck as 40 odd child benifit doesnt cover much, ex dh is not paying mantence untill april as he had to do letter etc and put in it when he intends paying, also i have some debt ex has said he will pay this but is there any formal thing we can do so he doesnt go back on his word

janb5

Hi Fizzel- I`m sorry to hear your news. Are you married to your partner because surely the army should help you. Your youngest is only 9 months and you have two others. I would speak to them for advice. Have you any family in Sevenoaks- hope you have some support.

Firehorse

Hi Fizzel,

Sorry to hear your news too, being a forces ex-wife myself I can sympathise with your predicament. However, we had already left the forces before we became divorced.

I appreciate that you'll want to move back "home" asap, but could it be possible to register for local council accommodation. I know there is always a waiting list. The forces will want their accommodation back, if they evict you, you'd be homeless through no fault of your own, would the council then take you on? It would be difficult, you could end up in temporary accommodation etc. If it worked, and when settled, would it then be possible to apply for a house swap back into your home area.

Another thought, we were in the forces years ago, but the accommodation is always registered and the responsibility of the enlisted member, in this case your dh. If he gave up the property, again you'd be evicted.

Perhaps I shouldn't even be suggesting this stuff. Anyway, wishing you all the best.

Morglin

Have you tried the Services Welfare?:

http://www.modoracle.com/?page=http://www.modoracle.com/service_welfare/service_welfare.cfm

They may be able to help you push for a home with Sevenoaks Council.

Lin

Ivrytwr3

There was a situation at a base i was at a few years ago, husband left wife with 2 young kids and refused to help; they were in military housing too.

The army refused to help and said it was a private matter (fair enough), but then as she was wanting to move back to her home town she hit the same brick wall as you did.

So the wife decided she wasn't going to make life easy as everywhere she turned no-one would help, she did not leave within the 93 days stating she had nowhere to go to. The housing people had to go through the process off eviction which itself takes a few months.

The military upped the rent, as a way of forcing her out, and threatened all sorts of legal action, but she held fast and the council (or whoever pays housing benefit) paid her rent until accommodation could be found at her chosen area.

She also had visits from the Padre sympathising, but basically telling her she had to leave, but she also got visits from SSAFA and other caring agencies, but it took extreme action before all of this was made available.

Things may have changed, but this is what she had to do to get the help she wanted.

Almost_Redundant

I think you will find that your rent is deducted from your husbands salary, so until he hands back (marches out of) your quarter he will be paying it. The length of time you can stay will ultimately depend on how much they need your house.

Spendless

When this happened to my SIL she was offerred a council house in her home town cos she was classed as homeless. IIRC She wasn't allowed to refuse the choice and had to take 1st thing offered. This was early 1990s so no idea if things have changed.