Help

Emmzi

ahh ok. grudge situation and will persist asking same question until they get the "right" answer.

OP you may have a long wait. Also it isn't your house. Why don't you get your partner to post here so we can have their side of the story?

shortbread

Yes it has been going on for a long time.....I'm not understanding the point in confirming that??? I'm looking for information regarding rights etc.....Being told to sell is great advice, but again its not what my partner wants to do....Am I being judged on that??

This post is simply anxiety from this stage in the situation. Obviously things change and have as his ex keeps changing what she wants.


I've come here for actually advice....had the original Sell it been an option we wouldn't be here now......
I fully appreciate peoples input and as its an open forum people can say what they want. However I am asking for genuine information...His ex doesn't want it sold now, she wants it as an investment according to her solicitor,but that's simply because she now wants to live in it. She wasn't interested in it for the last 3 years though.

I guess its easy to judge and give advice , but until you are in someones situation then its hard to grasp the reasons behind certain decisions. Whilst I think it would be a good idea to sell, I can also see why my partner wouldn't want to as he paid around 146k for the house selling now he'd be at a big loss.He wouldn't get back on property ladder into such such a nice house and hes worked really hard for 20 years to be able to have a house like this.

So I can see reasons why he wants to keep it.....if it was as simple as just selling it then I guess I wouldn't have been coming on here for the last 18 months or so....

shortbread

Emmzi.....its not a grudge situation, why do people like to make assumptions. I have been asking for advice as different situations have arisen. Things constantly changed and its not about waiting for the right answer its about wondering if anyone actually has information rather than just judgments or soapbox attitudes!!!! I know there are people on here who actually know what they are talking about and for this I am very thankful.

People don't have to read these posts do they. I appreciate everyone who offers advice as when something is causing such grief its good to know there are places with people going through similar.

Im posting my partners side of the story....its on his behalf..why would I come on here and lie about him??

Its not my house correct....but I'm doing this to try find some kind of information that may help him simply because his ex keeps changing the goal posts and making different demands every so often...

Emmzi

But you have had advice, and chosen not to take it. Not sure what is different now except ex wants to live in the house instead of your partner? there's still no money in it.

If your partner will not do the logical thing you need to ask yourself
a) how long you are going to keep making it your business
b) how long you are going to prop up his poor financial decisions
c) why he wants to keep himself tied to someone he is meant to not love any more.

Me, I'd be out of there like a shot, but I do have a tendency to dump first and ask questions later.

Try the relationships board for tactics and a second opinion, there is nothing new to tell you about the legal position.

Either or both of them is entitled to live in the house. End of story.

shortbread

Emmzi I wanted to know if anyone knew about his rights as she has said she wants back in and will go to court to keep him out...Id say a lot has changed since previously when she wanted it sold!!! I wanted to know information about where he may stand with regards to this such as does he have to agree etc...what if he doesn't?? Someone mentioned her having to pay him rent? Again its not about advice on selling it, its about advice on his rights, not what people think he should do.


Its my business when i see my partner losing sleep over it, its my business when my partner asks me to find out if I can get any information on here.

It may seem logical to you to sell but if it was your house that youd paid for the last 20 years, maybe then it wouldn't be so easy to walk away from if you didn't think you'd get back on the property ladder. It is easy to give advice on what YOU think he should do, but its more about actual INFORMATION on his his actual rights rather than people saying I think you should sell, I think you should sell....Obviously I do appreciate the input, but I guess you are simply missing the point of He's seeking Information rather than someones thoughts on what he should do. There is always someone who knows more about his legal position than we do.....Thats why I continually ask for information here as so often I find out things I didn't know. I guess I prop up his financial decisions because I was actually living there and well more often than not you usually help out those you care for when you are in a relationship??? So Im really not looking for relationship advice!!! As for staying attached to her, this is something he has been trying to end..wanting to keep the house and have her off the mortgage isn't staying attached to her is it??

mgdavid

what does your solicitor advise?
if you haven't been to see one, go now !
or would you rather wait until you hear what you want to hear - and believe what 'some bloke on the internet' said??

marliepanda

I think someone mentioned did HE pay HER rent, not the other way round.

Why would she pay him rent?

shortbread

Hes already paid 3k in solicitors fees to no avail, and right now doesnt have the cash to go to a solicitor.As for paying rent I have no idea what thats even about...rent was mentioned and Im assuming if he was to pay her rent then the same would apply if she lived in there....

marliepanda

It simply reads as a situation where no one is ever going to come out happy.

You say she 'didnt pay a penny' on the mortgage whilst she lived there. I think this is an unfair statement, she paid other bills. She contributed her salary to the household. Just because the mortgage came out of your partners account, does not mean that he solely paid the mortgage. They were a couple. They had a joint financial commitment. She was contributing to the household expenses so your partner did not have to pay the himself.

If you are not living in the house, I would say she has more right to live there than the man your partner is allowing to live there.

Considering your partner didnt pay her rent for her half during the time she did not live there, I do not see how you could ask her to pay it now.

If you 'allow' her to move in to her own home, and then lose your Pub home, how do you think you will kick her out? You won't be able to.

It is only ever going to cause way more worry and heartache than it is worth...

shortbread

Yes it is a horrid situation that could have been solved 3 years ago...alas it wasnt. Yes she paid bills, but Im simply pointing out that he paid out the mortgage and always has.
As for the rent...this is simply something I've learnt about. If shes excluding him from the house then he may well be advised to do this. She was never excluded she chose to leave.

I dont think I mentioned kicking her out if we lost our accommodation,but surely then my partner would have every right to move back there?

You are correct it is more bother than its worth....but I cant force my partner to just give up and let go of trying to hold onto something hes worked hard to get.